Election 2020: The Aftermath and How I Feel
Election 2020. One of the most stressful weeks I have ever faced. I know I wasn’t the only one, but I could not focus on school AT ALL. Usually I don’t necessarily like to have my main focus on politics, although it is really interesting. But the fact that this election was one of the most important ones and so many people had so much at stake, I can only imagine the stress and anxiety it came in, especially because the two candidates bidding for the presidency would determine how the policies in the United States would continue to shift in the upcoming years.
As someone who had a lot to lose (my healthcare, LGBTQ+ rights, my family risking deportation, etc) if the election would turn out for Trump, I was just praying and manifesting for it to all end up well. It was just a struggle getting by and dealing with the discrimination, racial slurs, and other factors because as a Latino living in a low-income community in the South East Los Angeles area, I already have to deal with enough hardships in my personal life. Throughout election week, I was glued to my laptop watching CNN almost 24/7 to see the updates on each state. Of course there were some states that did take a bit too long to count their ballots (cough, cough…Nevada), but ultimately Pennsylvania called for Joe Biden, leading him to win the election. Unfortunately, I slept through the moment they announced the winner, but as soon as I saw my phone and it announced that Biden won, there was this weight that lifted off my shoulders and I let out a huge sigh of relief. I did not realize that this election was affecting my mental health.
For the first time in four years, I had this feeling like we weren’t going backwards anymore. With Trump, it felt like we were reversing in time and undoing everything that all people have been working for. Although Joe Biden is not my preferable choice personally, I would rather settle for him and not deal with another four years of an administration that doesn’t care about its citizens, especially the people of color, low-income, the middle class, etc. Now that the election is over, we can all begin to progress and try to improve as a whole. At the same time, that will be difficult based on how the country is divided mainly because of Trump. At the same time, it’s better to start off somewhere new and different because from there we can develop and improve step by step.
How will we get through this? I’m not quite sure, but I feel like we’re just going to somehow wing it, and make it through and become somewhat united. It’s like if I decided to bs an essay and I somehow manage to get through it and finish before the deadline.
We went through a lot these past four years, but I just felt like coronavirus was the cherry on top. Although it’s been six months since this quarantine all started, I felt like I learned a lot about myself, but especially the election. I never cared to pay attention about politics since it’s not really my thing, but at the same time I was given a rude awakening and quickly found out that having four more years with Trump could have been the end of us to an extent. Watching the President’s behavior and seeing how he deals with world leaders and other influential figures made me realize we are in a huge hole, especially losing allies and relationships with people across the world. That’s where the stress and anxiety came in and I was not ready to deal with the uncertainty that was coming upon us. However, I felt like I became empowered during 2020 in some way. I gained more knowledge about what’s going on within the United States and around the world. I began to educate myself even more about topics that were barely mentioned up until now such as BLM, white supremacy/domestic terrorism, the effects on voting and its impact, and many other various topics that are so important to be talked about.
Once the election hit, I was a complete mess and couldn’t pay attention to any of my classes and even decided to skip a couple (but did go back to watch the recorded lectures), and watched CNN all day slowly waiting for the results and barely getting any sleep. Every time there would be a new update I would literally go out of control and and try to get my emotions put together; it was like a roller coaster, and at one point I self diagnosed myself with bipolar and mood swings.
At the end of the day, I just really hope things just get better, so we can finally focus on the future instead of holding onto that fear, anger, and frustration that I had felt for the last four years building up.
