We are all guilty of shrinking our TRUE selves for various reasons: to fit in, please our family members, bosses, friends, spouses, peers or outdated belief and value systems. Let’s be real, who wants to be in front of a firing squad? This is why so many people run from the extraordinary lives they are capable of living.
A great friend made me realize years ago the TRUTH: There is NOTHING honorable about conforming and shrinking yourself to prevent others from feeling insecure around you.
I used to believe what several leaders, friends and partners had told me: “You should tone it down, Michelle, just fit in and play the game.” Many of us have heard it before: “you are too vocal, too assertive, too outgoing, too kind, too INTIMIDATING, too this, too that.”
So we adjust, we tone it down, and call it “adapting” to make it sound heroic. When really it’s all to make others feel comfortable. But losing your true unique identity in exchange for the comfort of belonging, approval and conformity is a very large price to pay. Is it really worth it?
What about the people that are looking up to you and are inspired by you? Is your legacy to show them that fitting in and following an outdated value system is the way of life? Or would you rather choose to be an example of an inspiring, MODERN DAY WARRIOR? A person who shows up real and genuine armed with courage, authenticity, and vulnerability?
Today I’m proud to be guilty of embracing who I am. If people around you judge the crap out of you, make assumptions, write you off and make it about how you make them feel, it’s because they want you to stay small. It’s not about you. It’s that you remind them of their own fears, lack of courage, lack of authenticity.
There is nothing honorable in losing touch with your true self. Don’t stay small. Don’t belong. Don’t conform. Don’t tone it down. Don’t give in to your primal instinct to fit in. If you do, you could be missing the chance to play your part in the world.
Be guilty of being the real deal, playing big and don’t miss out on your chance to truly serve the world! Circumstances are all an excuse. It’s a CHOICE and every single one of us has been given the privilege to make this choice.
