WHO DECIDES IF YOU’RE A WRITER?
This is for the women before us who never used their voice.
If the answer to this question is anything other than YOU, than that’s sad. If you decide to wait for someone other than YOU to decide that you are a writer, it’s a terrible loss — -for you and for the world — - because the world need you to make your art!
I heard this wonderful advice from Author Liz Gilbert on her podcast Magic Lessons.
“Write yourself a letter from your older ancestors — especially women in your family who never got to use their voice. They remained voiceless because in their generation there weren’t nearly as many opportunities to speak out or use their voice.”
She suggested to write a list of every woman (grandmother, great grandmother etc.) in your families history who never had a voice. In my case, both of my grandmothers were in very unhappy marriages.
Their ‘job’ in life was to raise kids. My dads mom endured an intense controlling husband who beat her up often. My moms mom barely escaped Russia, as a Jew, and her whole family was wiped out. She was the only survivor in her family and suffered a lifetime of sadness and ‘voicelessness’.
So, of course neither of my grandmothers had a public voice.
PUT YOUR VOICE OUT THERE!
People seem to be afraid of criticism or rejection which is an excuse they make for not using their voice, but to be criticized is the tax that you pay for having a public voice! To be rejected is the tax that you pay for having a public voice!
There is a very simple way to make sure you are never criticized or rejected and that is to never have a public voice.
People choose that all the time. People choose to make quiet art in a room alone for for themselves only. That’s fine. That’s their right — - but there is only one way that you wont be rejected or criticized and that is to NOT share, or publish your work.
If you’re not putting your stuff out there because you’re afraid of criticism and rejection than you’re not willing to pay the tax that comes with the tremendous privilege of having the OPPORTUNITY to have a public voice.
You might be the first woman in the entire history of your family who had the possibility of speaking out freely. There might be endless generations of women who came before you who might be begging you to use your voice because they couldn’t or wouldn’t. If you remain as quiet as they were, when they were oppressed and had no options, you are somehow doing a disservice to them. They want you bigger than they were.
We also have the privilege of making art that people hate. What a lucky thing to do that with our lives.
LIZ GILBERT
We should remember that even though we want people to resonate with our work, we also have the privilege to make art that people don’t like!
When I’m feeling really small or fearful or doubting my voice or whenever I feel like going in a corner and hiding my work from the world, it helps to think of my mother, grandmother and her grandmothers grandmother who might’ve given anything to have the chance to be a presence in the world.
They died voiceless.
Today, I feel them all standing behind me sometimes saying — put it OUT THERE woman!!GO! GO! GO! BE BRAVE!! If you cant put it out there for yourself , put it out there for those of us who never had a voice.