Attention Major League Baseball! It’s time to clean house.
And I’m guessing that for all you old white men who run MLB and own teams, cleaning house means only one thing — get a woman to do it.
You are right! You need a woman — probably a whole team of females! — to clean up the mess you’re making of this season and of the game itself.
Where to start? How about finding a middle-woman to run the negotiations between the owners and the players?
How about the Commissioner’s Office? A woman’s touch there would go a long way toward sprucing up the place.
Ownership? Certainly there are some smart businesswomen who wouldn’t mind buying a share of a team that sweeps in profits faster than you can light a big cigar.
Need some ideas? Have you read anything but the Dow Jones lately? If so, you may have noticed there were several women candidates for the Presidential nomination.
Have you looked at the Supreme Court recently? At least one of the justices — who just happens to be female — is a committed baseball fan.
You might check out some of the District Courts where there are even more women handing down decisions — something you don’t seem to be able to do.
Peek into a few corner offices and you’ll notice high heels under many of the desks.
Head to a university campus or two and you might learn a thing or two from some of the outstanding administrators of the female persuasion.
If you need more ideas, go home and ask your wives. They’ll be able to help you out . . .
. . . while you grab a broom and start cleaning house.