Time drags like a lethargic serpent…
Lessons from depression…
Time drags like a lethargic serpent, traveling in an irregular and rough sinusoidal wave.
Several moments of pain and effort, sometimes followed by success, leads to happiness. Almost euphoric moments.
Hallelujah!
Time rolls with the realization, that the euphoric state too was short-lived.
And those moments when you fail spectacularly, emotionally.
Disbelief, denial, paranoia, anger.
Days of carrying that persistent, and dense cloud of grief in the stomach.
The burden of immense grief. You question the worthiness of life.
Time crawls at an unbelievably slow pace…
Moments of boredom. Nothing happens.
You wait for some clues, some signal. Something?
No… Nothing.
Sharing helps for a while, till it doesn’t.
Monotonous talks. You hear yourself, this has already been shared, last week, last month, and last year too.
You can neither reason nor defend the cause. The mere presence of it is the truth for you.
You have nothing different to say. You don’t feel anything different.
Boring! You laugh, unknowingly.
Boredom kills. One gets bored of boredom as well.
Static, unmoving, stagnant.
That dense cloud of grief in the stomach remains. But one gets used to it.
You feel normal.
Something moved inside!
You feel like grabbing that moment. You try to make some sense, try to work on it, try to create something.
Moments pass. Nothing comes out.
That moment fizzles away.
But, you sense possibility. Yes!
You hold on to that thread.
Work, work, work!
Moments of doubt brush by.
It doesn’t matter, you tell yourself.
It’s painful, but you push yourself. Keep pushing, till something comes out of it.
Wow! You see that something has a shape.
Secretly, you like what you have created.
A moment of a smile.
After several moments of hesitation, doubts, you dare! Let someone take a peek at your creation.
An unknown one sends a signal of appreciation, from somewhere.
Moments of some smiles.
Moments of happiness.
Moments of Euphoria.
Hallelujah!
That lethargic serpent, however, is already on the move!
