How to be a Better Mentee: A Response to “How to be a Better Mentor”
About a week ago, one of my mentors shared an article he wrote titled “How to Become a Better Mentor & Why I Can’t Help You.” It talked about his experience with mentoring younger designers and the lessons that he created to help people become stronger mentors.
I instantly fell in love with the article, not only because he put himself out there and shared how he mentors, but he related it to my all time favorite movie “Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse.” I commented on his article letting him know that this article meant so much to me.
Fast forward a couple hours after, he challenged me to write an article on the mentee side, sharing my side on this topic and relating it to the Academy Award winning movie. Well Jarell, here it is: my take on how to be a better mentee.
Don’t take every piece of feedback to heart
We’ve all been there: we go to a mentor session and the mentor is firehosing us with information. You feel overwhelmed, and you feel even more lost as opposed to having a clearer sense of direction on where you should go.
This is a problem I faced very early in my mentee journey, and the best piece of advice I have for that is to not take every piece of advice to heart. Even if the person you’re talking to has years of experience, you know yourself the best and should prioritize the feedback that is going to help you the most.
A useful technique I used was something that I learned in my UX bootcamp: affinity map. Literally UX your mentee journey by writing down what your mentors are saying and seeing if there’s any repeating patterns. It’ll help you see what is most important to focus on at the moment.
Be open-minded and listen in
This is a bit counterintuitive to what I said earlier, but I found that the best advice that I got from my mentors are the ones that I wasn’t even looking for. When I was looking for feedback on my portfolio, sometimes my mentors would shift the conversation into a completely different topic, and that’s completely fine.
It’s okay to have a plan when going into a mentor session, but also be open to the idea of letting the conversation shift around. This is a conversation and you should allow it to flow naturally and not feel forced. Listen to your mentor so you can identify why they’re telling you the things that they are saying.
Treat mentorship like it’s a relationship
I’m not saying to go out and date your mentor, but you should treat it as if you were going out with someone romantically. Not everyone that you’re going to meet is going to fit your vibe, so stick close to the ones that you can organically make a relationship with and feel comfortable around.
I’ve met with several mentors, and out of the 20+ people who I met on ADPList, LinkedIn, and within the GA network, I only consider 5 of them to be my mentors. Not saying that the others didn’t provide me mentorship, but those 5 are the ones that I still keep in touch with, and try to meet on a regular basis.
You are your own person
Listen, we all have aspirations and people who we want to be, but remember that you are your own person. As my boy Steve Jobs puts it:
“Time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.”
So use your mentor as a guiding point as opposed to someone that you have to become.
My own life experiences and learnings are unique to me, and it’s what makes me, well, unique. Cultivate your journey and self-reflect on what you learn and experience so it gives you a clear image on how much you’ve grown and evolved. It may seem scary, but trust me, you won’t regret it.
Now go out there and kick some butt!
I hope this article helps you out. Being a mentee is actually kind of tough, but if you consider the things that I wrote here (and again, taking it with a grain of salt) you may find that being a mentee is one of the best things ever. Who wouldn’t want to watch themselves grow into the super hero that they aspire to be?
If you’re someone who’s looking for their Peter B. Parker, check out ADPList as there’s over 2,000 mentors there who can help you on your journey to become the next Spider-Man. You may also have some mentors within your existing network, so check out your connections on LinkedIn and see who’s there.
One last piece of advice to wrap this up: if you’re someone who is scared of mentorship, just know that it’s a leap of faith. You’ll never know who or what will help you on your journey, so be open to try things out. Because if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be where I am now writing this article to you all.
If you found this helpful, feel free to check out my other articles! Connect with me on LinkedIn if you want to keep the conversation going, and check out my YouTube channel to see me interact with other beginner and senior designers within the community.
Want some mentor recommendations? Check out my ADPList profile and my post on how to look for mentors.
