D i s c o n n e c t e d as a GHC Fellow
That moment, when you feel all alone
Thousands of miles away from all your friends, family
Everything you call home
Every situation, you’re the only one that looks like…
You
And people tend to group towards those that are similar to…
Them
So while everybody groups together who are similar then…
That feeling of loneliness hits…
Over and over again
My fellowship year was filled with experiences of being
A little bit dejected
At times neglected
But there were so many memories that were…
Unexpected
With that said….
I present to you my story about feeling so…
D i s c o n n e c t e d
-Fin
Eishhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
A little too heavy, right? You must forgive me, but my Global Health Corps Fellowship was quite the year for me.
I mean, this was the first time I was ever away from home. And for my first time away, I chose for it to be 8,000 miles away on the other side of the world!
Go big or go home!
Hmmmmmmm….
Yeah go home — that sounded like a good plan to me.
I didn’t want to go home for the obvious reasons. Of course I felt disconnected from my family, best friends, people that I was used to seeing and talking to every day. But homesickness came and went for me. Like I missed being home, but then I started getting used to life in Malawi. The other disconnections in my life were what made going home early so appealing.
For starters, I had expectations going into my organization that I would have more of a role, or any role for that matter…
Coming from a hectic year of being a City Year Corps member, where my days consisted of chasing down rogue children, constantly improvising activities and lessons, preventing poorly timed fights, and of course giving “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you” hugs, sitting in an office all day was not what I expected or wanted.
I would see the work and projects that other fellows got to do and was “happy” for them.
Even while I was in the office, there was a disconnection from being involved in office conversations because most people spoke in Chichewa. Just being a different race from other fellows and expats in the country made me feel ostracized and completely out of place. And the cherry on the top was that I was literally disconnected so many times when trying to talk to my fiancé over WhatsApp.
Forget that GHC was an opportunity I’ve always dreamed of, and never did I think I would have the chance to become a fellow. Feeling like an outsider in every single aspect of my life made me want to go home and be like “nah homie, this ain’t worth it”. I even wrote down all the weeks I had left as a fellow and crossed out dates each week until the end of the fellowship.
But my story does not end there…
No not even close…
During my fellowship year, I grew disproportionately more than any other time in my life.
While feeling so disconnected, I had a choice. The choice was to keep feeling disconnected, or to make the most out of this experience. I chose the latter and started saying yes to more opportunities.
And because of that decision, my life changed forever.
By exposing myself to new events, activities, and people, I found the coolest group of friends who shared the same passions I had.
Because of the friends I met, I got an opportunity to co-organize the #WeDemand TEDx Lilongwe Youth Viewing Party for over 150 youth to have a platform to voice out their demands for what they expect from their government, policy makers, and peers.
I was able to work with my friends and be a facilitator for the Ticheze Youth Forums that have taken and will take place in four major cities in Malawi.
Brah I was disconnected for a while…
But because I started getting uncomfortable, I reconnected to embrace a new experience, group of friends, and way of life.
Getting uncomfortable is not easy though! If it were easy, everybody would live in a different country, doing this or that.
And it shouldn’t be. Nothing extraordinary in life should come easy — where’s the fun in that?
But you know what’s really easy in life? Giving up. Quitting. Peace-ing out, my dude.
Don’t be a loaf of garlic bread. ;)
It seems pretty obvious that with great achievements comes great struggle. But too many of us, including myself, look to give up when things get too challenging.
If you want to follow your dreams, apply for GHC, and become a leader in the health or social justice field, I’m telling you now you have to be ready to fail. You have to get out of your comfort zone and have uncomfortable conversations and experiences. You have to be able to face your fears that keep you from shining your light to the world.
You also have to, dare I say it — get d i s c o n n e c t e d.
Thank you for reading my story. You can follow my journey at aspiringentrep.com.
