Cancer, racism, suicide ideation, and the privilege to be a victim.
In a world where violence in chat rooms, social media platforms, and television extends to violence in classrooms, halls of government, and beyond, as a society we need to ask ourselves why everyone isn’t worthy of protection.
After weeks of conjecture, speculation, and inarguably one of the worst public relations strategies in modern royal history, the Princess of Wales announced that after her abdominal surgery in January, cancer cells were detected, and she has begun a preventive chemotherapy course. Looking frail and vulnerable, Princess Catherine sat surrounded by flowers and pleaded for privacy. The world responded. Before the evening’s end, a global outpour of support surrounded the Princess, in the likes of which I’ve never seen in my adult life.
I found it striking because…
I’m old enough to remember a fortnight ago, when it was revealed that a major political financier called for Diane Abbott, the first Black woman elected to the United Kingdom’s Parliament “to be shot,” because looking at her made him “want to hate all black women.” I cannot imagine waking up and going about one’s day, and learning that the largest contributor to the governing party of your country called for your execution. The execution of a sitting elected official who once received forty-five percent of all abuse directed to UK Parliamentarians on X (formerly Twitter).
Once again: Forty-five percent of all Parliamentarian abuse on X was directed at one individual.
It’s also worth noting that in the last ten years, two UK Parliamentarians, Jo Cox and David Amess, were murdered by extremists.
That said, I missed the scores of articles in British newspapers, journalists, and chat show presenters, calling for people to leave Diane Abbott alone and protect her peace and privacy, as done for the Princess shortly before her announcement. I missed the unanimous and unqualified public displays of support from all political leaders in the United Kingdom, and abroad, expressing their solidarity with Diane Abbott against this abuse with the same conviction as we’ve seen with the Princess. And I by no means wish to imply that the Princess of Wales is not deserving of this compassion. I’m simply inquiring as to when said compassion is extended, to whom, and under which circumstances?
More so, I’m equally old enough to remember the deeply distressing treatment of Meghan Markle.
After torrents of abuse throughout her pregnancy, the Duchess of Sussex requested privacy after delivering her first child. The response? As taxpayer funded public servants, she and the seventh-in-line to the British throne, were entitled to none. In the face of epithets, racist tropes, and credible death threats, the people had a right to see more than her child’s foot. Which is interesting, given how open Prince William is regarding the privacy of his children, and how accepted that seems to be by the same segments of the media.
I remember when the Duchess of Sussex had a private letter to her father intercepted by a tabloid, and there were serious arguments by members of the press that the contents of this letter were public information. The court of law saw differently.
I remember during the midst of this tornado of torture, when that same Duchess fought back tears during an interview when asked if she was ok, because no one else had. I remember, unsurprisingly given the circumstances, when the Duchess of Sussex revealed that she was suicidal because of the hysteria of hatred that surrounded her. I also remember a well-established journalist calling her a liar on national television and storming off the set, after this revelation.
Most poignantly, I remember watching that Duchess cry in a Netflix special, discussing how this incitement of hate made her fear for her life. For the lives of her children. How she couldn’t comprehend how indifferent people were to their safety. What I also remember is after that special, some people were more concerned about her mocking a curtsy than people wanting to kill her.
What I don’t remember is a tidal wave of solidarity.
Even today, when the heavily criticized manipulated Mothering Sunday photo was released, several journalists made the fallacious argument comparing the alterations to Misan Harriman’s black-and-white photo of the Duchess of Sussex and Prince Harry. Because four years after the couple relocated to a different continent, in part to escape these people, the “blame Meghan at all costs” narrative persists.
After Princess Catherine’s announcement, several members of the media made a clarion call to cease online speculation, mockery, and privacy invasion regarding her condition. I think that’s more than appropriate. It’s equally appropriate to note that no such call has ever been made against the abuse received by Diane Abbott, Ngozi Fulani–founder of SistahSpace, Meghan Markle, Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, former First Lady Michelle Obama, Whitney Houston, Britney Spears, Chadwick Boseman, and scores of others.
I think the global outpouring of support for the Princess of Wales is beautiful. I only wish that same understanding of privacy and protection were extended to everyone, and I ask that we interrogate ourselves as to why it’s not. At a grassroots solidarity rally organized by her constituents, Diane Abbott defiantly said, “I’m nobody’s victim. Nobody’s victim at all.” I wonder if she says that because she doesn’t see herself that way, because she knows that others don’t, or both?
Finally, on a personal note, my heart goes out to the Princess of Wales, and everyone impacted by cancer. I’ve had both friends and family diagnosed with this malicious and indiscriminate disease. Of those who were, most did not survive. Not too long ago, a close friend of mine was diagnosed with an advanced stage of breast cancer. Her children were close to the ages of Prince George, Princess Charlotte, and Prince Louis when she received the news. Today, after several rounds of chemotherapy and a double mastectomy, my friend is cancer free.
I wish the same prognosis for the future Queen of England.
