Meet a Professional Rememberer

From what I’ve read, many Aspies have better than average memories of events that took place long ago.

I definitely do. And to that end, I invite you to play a little game. I’ll share some of my recollections about growing up, and offer up a few puzzlers to test your distant recollection.

Can I quote chapter and verse on the only home run I ever hit in organized baseball? Verily, I say unto you. The 181-foot drive came off Jason Harris in Little League. My coach, Mr. Crigger, met me with a giant hug. Despite my heroics, the Jaycees lost to the Mattie Roundtree Garden Club, 4–1.

Can I recall the telephone numbers of my best childhood friends? Naturally. Bill S. could be reached at 628–3025. Bill W. answered to 628–3369.

The first 45 rpm record I bought with my own money was “Tom Dooley” by the Kingston Trio. I was 9 years old.

WCYB, the television station in nearby Bristol, Va., hosted a program called Classroom Quiz. Teams of three high school students answered questions. I was a member of the Episcopal Church Senior Youth Group that was selected to appear. We won in consecutive weeks before losing. Questions I answered correctly were about the statue of Admiral Lord Nelson in London’s Trafalgar Square, the catapult as an ancient weapon and the dingo dogs of Australia. I whiffed on the one about the Rockettes at New York City Music Hall.

The first time I danced cheek-to-cheek was with Barbara P. at a dance party in Roger P.’s basement. I was in the sixth grade.

The only time I farted loud enough for everyone in the room to hear was in Mr. Elton’s ninth-grade algebra class. He stopped in the middle of the simultaneous linear equation he was solving at the chalkboard and said, “Thar she blows.”

Did you, like me, have a paper route when you were a kid? Like me, did you hoof it? Could you retrace your steps? How many customers can you name? Who were the ones who never paid on time? Did you have any special requests as to where you place the newspaper?

What was the first manual-shift vehicle you drove?

When was the first time you visited your state capital?

In elementary school, where did your class go on field trips?

Growing up, what were (are) the call letters of your hometown radio station?

When was the last time you played tackle football?

When was the last time you hitchhiked?

Like me, you had to climb the rope in PE class. Recall who could get to the top and who couldn’t.

Think of the boys and girls you knew in school. Now think houses of said individuals. For whatever reason — doing homework, playing sports, watching TV, exchanging dolls — count the different living rooms you’ve been in.

According to your parents, what were the words you butchered the worst as a toddler? Mom and Dad said I was in first grade before I stopped saying “windmill schipers” when I meant “windshield wipers.”