Big Hearted Ists & Isms
Whether or not you believe that you are an ist or have an ism does not negate the fact that you do. I do. We are a world of ists and isms.
Accused of an ism, may prompt defensive responses such as, “But, I’m not! I don’t vote that way.” or “I love all people, all races and creeds.”
The accused rightfully feels judged.
But what is an ism and why are we so quick to classify others and so offended when others classify us?
Social categorization is inherent. Sorting ourselves can be helpful, for infants it helps identify and build trust. Often though, social categories can be used to oppress through legislation or surveillance. Stereotyping others leads to a dehumanization, and hate crimes.
How shall we best lump ourselves and others?
We are Patriots or Nationalists and often don’t know the difference. We might hold the tenets of Capitalists, Socialists, Communists, Fascists, Marxist, Misogynists, Anarchists, Racists and Abelists and disagree on the dangers of them. Though, you really can’t just simply disagree on things that oppress others, especially in a country that offers freedom and equality for all, at least on paper. So, I could just say those ists are wrong. Blanket statement. End of argument. Right?
However, our nation can’t find agreement on those ists, their affects and reach into our society. Since many don’t see themselves as Racists or Misogynists, how can they understand systemic problems and inherent dangers to some because of the policies of others? Most of us don’t experience bias, bigotry and prejudice in the same way that BIPOC, disabled, LGBTQUIA+ and all who identify as women might. Therefore many cannot fully understand the need for change.
There’s a large swath of spiritual isms and ists that we grow up or evolve into. We might deem ourselves Traditionalist, Monotheist, Polytheist, Secularist, Nihilist, Pacifist, even as we act in measures directly opposed to those teachings.
We certainly all have some level of Egotism, and likely some Narcissism, Fanaticism, Neuroticism, Heterosexism, Humanism, Theism, Classism and Ageism.
All those ists and isms listed above…And we may not even know that we fall into a category or share pieces of an ist. We might not understand that we believe in one or more of these isms and that they overlap and even conflict.
The really interesting piece is the human inside the ism. Many ists and isms go home after work, wave to their neighbors, pet their dog, hug their families and put their kids to bed. Many isms and ists gather in a sacred place to revere something other than themselves or give back to their world in ways that feel purposeful.
What makes a good person?
And who gets to decide?
In our cancel culture, is there a downside to calling out ists and isms? And is it helpful, healthy or hurtful? It certainly feels imperative to shine a light on behavior, judgement or legislation that hurts others, but what if the “good people” feel bad when they are told they aren’t as good as they thought?
I’ve seen an entrenching on the side of “goodness” as a downside. Both sides of any battle feel justified. Perception, that is the war to be waged.
Professor Ross at Smith College was recently interviewed for the New York Times, article, What If Instead Of Calling People Out, We Called Them In. She discusses the calling out of and doesn’t condone, but asks for private conversations and respect versus public shaming and doom scrolling.. It asks more of us. She says it is a “Call out done with love.”
“Every time somebody disagrees with me it’s not ‘verbal violence.’” Professor Ross said. She goes on to point out that the, “Overstatement of harm is not helpful when you’re trying to create a culture of compassion.” Ross is encouraging a revolutionary thing, discourse.
I see these descriptions of ists and isms as a necessary education of our often unaware society. And it’ll hurt for a while. An awakening usually takes time and some amount of internal turmoil. All cycles swing and it seems we are currently on the far side of that pendulum. Only when we’ve collectively learned that labels are only tools and not weapons, will we see it swing back to a healthier place.
Who gets to claim goodness?
Is there a scale, a score board? A person may be a loving individual and still support things hurtful to others. Unless they are called on it, they look at their life overall, recognize the good they have done in their communities, the friends they hold dear, the donations to organizations of their passion and come away with the obvious conclusion that they are “good”.
They may not even realize why someone might declare or decide otherwise and therefore dismiss that person or group as wrong, crazy, insane, dangerous.
It is always easier to see the opposition as an other, a something, not a someone.
Political and corporate power relies on dehumanization.
In fact a person may think that being called an ist or ism is hateful, and unkind. Something other than descriptive of their actions.
It may hurt, it may cut at their identity. This person may not fully understand what could possibly be ‘evil’ about their particular brand of ‘good’.
Good and Evil are constructs. They are colors on a wall, simple, easy to paint in broad strokes. Like Black and White, they don’t actually exist. They are human made labels created to box others in, or steep us into a world view we prefer. Constructs lay the foundation for an identity we build and claim. Superiority is the biggest wall to demolish.
But even if Good and Evil weren’t just words and simple ones at that, they cannot describe a whole. Much like the Yin Yang, life is a cycle of opposites attracting and complimenting. Balancing of those forces is necessary, and war to achieve it, so far, inevitable. History reveals this time and again. Empires rise and fall, religions blossom and die only to spark again, with a new face, new name, more deaths, same conclusions.
Freedom and oppression rest so closely against each other, we chain ourselves to chain others.
Righteous and Malicious, those are the two angels sitting on our shoulders, if that analogy is more akin to your belief. However, equal parts of both rest in each of us. It is our actions that speak the truth of their influence.
Evil often becomes a label we apply to others, rarely one we claim in our own actions. We know our intentions. We mean well. We know a lot and have years on the competition. We are certainly more wise, more just.
Awareness doesn’t come from pointing fingers at others, it comes from research, reflection and pointing fingers inward.
That we embody an ist or ism isn’t uncommon or unusual, and neither is hating others for them.
We must address the underlying commonality. That we are each human. We must allow for that, and bridge a gap to actions that are inhumane. We must enlighten ourselves and each other. Sometimes that means calling out or admitting an ist or ism.
Unkindness does not lie in description. Taking offense to description can mean it is either unfounded or it cut too close to you. Which do we find more unsettling?
Name calling is unkind, demeaning language and unhelpful or hurtful statements are unkind. Stereotyping is not helpful. Threats are dangerous.
But description is a must. We must be able to call out an ist or ism that is hurting others and describe how. Professor Loretta Ross, was called out for calling out and that is called gaslighting, when an injustice or untruth is brought to light.
Learning how an ist or ism has affected others over time is imperative to reconciling our shared history. That can only be accomplished by owning our own biases and ists and isms individually. Injustices passed on in silence or ignorance, continue.
Humanity, what a destination. What a tightly packed and shared boat we row to get there.
To be more than our ists and isms, we must learn more than how to best negate each other. Communication, respect, discomfort, awareness, these are the tools. We each are still understanding how our voice, our vote, our tirade affects another person or group. We don’t always know how we hurt ourselves and others. Collectively we may not agree, and our world will still pit us against each other, but that only means we have to take on the burden of knowledge with more ardor.
We must learn what it means to row the boat forward for all.
