The Mormon Church Ruined My Family
This is my story after the Mormon (LDS) Church
I had a bad day, a crap day at work. Those times when everything goes wrong. But I was in awe with myself.
I was drinking beer at 6am, a Friday morning. I was sitting outside on a bench in the smoking area.
The sun was peaking through the clouds and over the Pacific. I could smell the sea salt in the air. The salt made my eyes water, at times. Sometimes, it felt like I was on another planet.
I had just finished a night shift and it was my first beer in years. It felt like the milk and honey of life.
I lived in a big military barracks area in Japan at the time, and my coworkers knew me. They knew I never drank or swore.
“What are you doing drinking? Is everything ok?”
“Yeah, I think I figured out something.”
I enjoyed the sunlight, life, and a cold beverage without shame for the first time in a long time — without the shame of not striving for perfection.
Why?
I realized then how much I had been lying to myself. I realized I wanted to believe that I was a bad person. That I could only become perfect through the Mormon church.
I realized I was trying to believe in something that went completely against my own person and human nature.
I felt off. I felt like I was trying to be some capitalist version of Jesus Christ. I’d wear nice clothes to church, say my prayers, and do every other demand.
I did it to fit in; to please the Big Man; to find a wife that would love me for being a strong, religious man; to fill my life full of purpose.
I remember being so loyal that I’d never imagine writing something like this. But there’s been enough healing since that day. I can now write about the Mormon church and not care.
I left the church five years ago, and I don’t regret it one bit.
They hurt my mother and father
My family was never wealthy. They’d only asked for help from the church after my dad’s kidney’s had failed and he’d been unable to work. This was when I was still in high school.
At first, the church was kind. Our church branch “president” was nice even, very kind.
After a couple years though, after I was gone. The issues started. At times, I couldn’t believe it was the same church.
People with power like to remind the people under them that they have a foot at their throat — and try to make it look like mercy.
My mom liked the church. She cooked huge meals for everyone without help. She’d buy everything and cook everything.
One day, the president asked my mother to step into the office to talk about an issue.
The church president then accused my mother of causing people to leave the religion and church. My mom, not knowing anything became really sick, traumatized in a way even.
She suffered a small stroke, became overweight. Then she left the church because she couldn’t stand to be talked to like she was some sort of criminal.
The church president would then call ask what happened, why she stopped showing up. It was sick, disgusting stuff.
She still suffers from what happened, and I hope one day she can forget it all.
They broke my father down very slowly. He never asked for help, ever. He never took anything for free.
He had worked all his life. But he asked for help because the church offered in a very kind and warm way.
After a while though, the billion dollar church reprimanded my father in a meeting about how he had taken more than was fair.
“You shouldn’t even have a can of peas left over when you ask for help. If you really needed help, you wouldn’t have leftovers.”
This really happened. The president said this to a grown man with four kids.
It was the first time someone had made my father feel like a beggar. A loser. And that just broke my heart.
Too many stories to fit into one blog
These stories are just two of many that I’ve heard and witnessed. These are the moments that will stick with me my entire life.
This could be considered gossip or lies even, but I have a right to judge and write about moments that I’ve felt and witnessed.
I know good people who were turned into outcasts and made to feel like degenerates by their own “good” families.
I’m only glad that I figured out what I truly felt and believed in before it was too late. Before I married into the religion and lost all my freedom.
Now, I’m happily married, have savings, have a life of hobbies, and I’m happy with my own mistakes and temptations.
I now know that the Mormon Church, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, is not the true church by a long shot.
I know there’s good people in this organization who don’t know a way out and who are just trying to be good.
I’d tell these people that life isn’t as scary as you imagine outside the Church’s golden gates. You’ll have the chance to figure out who you really are.
Books that confirmed my doubts and helped me move on
Being sure of yourself in this case is difficult. You still have the millions of people who keep believing in the Mormon faith.
So, here’s a list of wonderful books that helped me stay strong and leave the church for good.
- No Man Knows My History: The Life of Joseph Smith — Fawn M. Brodie (An honest account of the religion’s founder and creator, Joseph Smith,)
- An American Fraud: One Lawyer’s Case Against Mormonism — Kay Burningham (Interesting story about the Church’s power over the law.)
- Lying For the Lord: The Paul H. Dunn Stories — Lynn Packer (This story is fun to read since you see how far lies can go in the Church.)
- Joseph Smith — Robert V. Remini (The first book I read. Just a good historical view that puts the “prophets” story into perspective. There were many people claiming to be prophets at the same time and place that Joseph Smith was.)
