Where are my regrets? Nowhere, because I have nun.

Photo by nick Kaufman on Unsplash

Already fucked up my chances,
Guess the gun’s pointed at me.
I’ve been moving slow,
I’ve been moving careful,
I’m too nice for my own good.
I’m too precise for my own hood.

I just wanna lay it down.
I love my Lana Del Rey,
I should listen to her more,
And pray to Jesus everyday.

My life is a masterpiece,
Too perfect to display,
I hate the feedback I receive from my mother,
Always got something to say.
Loneliness is sometimes happiness but when sadness kicks in, I think to myself, you chose to have it this way.

I hate the missing bruises on my skin.
Sherlock Holmes painted my masterpiece a yellowish gray.
Goosebumps on my skin,
I think it’s from my poetry.
Hairs raise up, then rise up.
Down by the bay.
My romance is left in Gotham’s East End, down by the presidential’s bay.
Cryings not the way.
There must be another way.
There must be another way.

Caged like a foreign princess,
Beauty aging each second of flesh.
But we don’t have all things in common,
She knows her future and I’m just a loser,
Not a picker but a chooser,
In my first world filthy rich country.

Already fucked up my chances,
I’m not going to the dances,
But I still got to remind myself that everything I say, do & see,
I live it with no regrets.
Even being in the hands of a consensual rapist,
Willingly putting myself on the line,
I won’t regret to be bold instead of shy.
I will therefore make an oath to myself no regrets till’ I die.
I need to keep my secrets ashore.
Keep more secrets for my sanity.
I need something personal to hold onto,
For the rest of my eternity.

Ugly girls get the boyfriends first,
I still need confirmation on this from my future, but for now this is the motto I’m living on.

Ugly girls get the boyfriends first.
Pretty girls are saved for marital last.
Trust me on this,
Signed
Pretty girl

“I love you ray,” I say.

“Where is your real boyfriend?”

“I don’t know, I don’t have one yet, but can I still hang with you?”

“Yeah baby anytime.”

“Okay ray I love you.”

“Love you too pretty girl.”

Laughs cutely both him and I.