But Is There Any Chicken?
24 Days of Struggle at Yoga Teacher Training in Goa, India
Most people already thought I was a yoga teacher. Well, I mean, I guess I was a “rogue yogi”, teaching every week at a tech startup without any sort of certification.
In seeking an acro yoga adventure, I found that most acro retreats had some other aspect or activity I wasn’t particularly interested in (acro and stand-up paddleboard! acro and detox! acro and snow!). The retreat we ultimately chose included a multi-style Yoga Alliance teaching certification, and hey, a yoga teacher certification in India probably looks extra cool.
Some surprises awaited upon arrival. Namely, no hot water, essentially camping in bamboo huts, and a completely vegan diet. Oh, and India.
Nothing could have prepared me for the experience of India.
There’s really no way to describe the type of anxiety sparked by driving at breakneck speed in the improper lane past cars and motorcycles and scooters and tuktuks honking at each other constantly, narrowly missing cows, dogs, pedestrians, carts, and giant holes in the road. Constantly being followed by shopkeepers and cab drivers desperately seeking a sale, my pale skin a clear indicator of wealth. Haggling over every transaction for what amounted to a few US cents. Watching hordes of homeless dogs fighting or sniffing around, some with their back legs several degrees askew. Poverty so extreme that people literally live in dirt.
Besides the environment outside the ashram (use this word to sound fancy when describing a yoga school), a 200-hour teacher certification in 24 days is no simple feat. The course itself is the easy part, though. Yoga anatomy, yoga theory, yoga history: no problem. Yoga practice in 5 different styles: informative and fun, though physically exhausting. Asana clinics, learning the key alignments and common mistakes of 90-something poses: actually interesting.
It’s the rest that’s hard. The monotony of the same five or six vegan dishes with slight variations (lentils, so many lentils). The “coffee” (India is a tea country for a reason). The two students who can’t bear to just let the teachers talk, and absolutely must interject their uninformed opinions at the juncture of every sentence. Being surrounded 24/7 by hippie archetypes (no, really, everything you’ve imagined or seen on Awaken with JP is probably true), Living with the same person on the exact same schedule in a 200-square foot hut for 24 days, with a bathroom door made out of bamboo. A wedding venue down the street broadcasting horrible covers of “Despacito” every Thursday. Power and internet outages when I most needed to talk to people. The biggest and hungriest mosquitoes I’ve ever seen. The time difference back home, and completely lacking words to adequately describe my experience. Spending Christmas with strangers in a country that doesn’t celebrate it.
Despite all the challenges, and all the times I nearly quit, I’m now a certified yoga teacher. The scary thing is, so is everyone else in that course.
Actual Results
I am grateful to myself (as strange as that sounds) for pushing through the difficulties, because I actually learned a lot.
Years ago, I tried meditating for just five minutes each day. I gave up after months without progress, resigning that I’m just not a meditate-y type. In this training I had the first few successful meditations of my life. The purpose of yoga, I learned, is to prepare one’s body and mind for meditation. Really, that’s it. Not to get a good workout, to do the splits, or to wear those LuluLemon pants.
Needless to say, I’m in great shape now. The teachers helped me push my body into poses I’ve not been able to reach before.
I fell in love with Ashtanga, a style of yoga I’d previously tried a few times and disliked immensely. I learned to appreciate its rigor and discipline, its sequential repetition.
I learned to safely and gently make adjustments on students.
And most importantly, I received constant lessons on acceptance. Accepting myself where I’m at for the day (physically and mentally), accepting others for what they are and what they’re capable of (and what they’re not).
“Yoga is the purification of the mind-stuff”, according to the guy who pretty much invented it. I’d second that; though I have a long way to go, my mind-stuff is slightly better for this experience.
Daily Schedule
- 06:30–08:30 Asana class: Vinyasa, Hatha, Ashtanga, pranayama, meditation, or kriyas
- 08:30–09:30 Breakfast
- 10:00–11:20 Philosophy and teaching methodology class
- 11:30–01:30 Asana clinic, adjustment, or practicum
- 13:30–15:30 Lunch
- 15:30–16:20 Anatomy or physiology class
- 16:30–18:00 Asana class: Ashtanga, Aerial, Hatha, Vinyasa, or Yin yoga
- 18:30–19:30 Meditation, kirtan, Ayurveda, and group discussion
- 19:30–20:00 Dinner
- 20:00–21:00 Study time
