Should I quit drinking right before I go through something terrible?

Every other week I’ll answer one recovery/addiction related question posed by Anxy readers, based on my experience. This isn’t meant to diagnose or provide medical advice — that responsibility lies with physicians. The author is not a licensed medical professional.

Dear Katie,

I know I need to quit drinking. Friends and family keep commenting on how much I’m drinking and — more than that — I’m just really sick of waking up with significant gaps in my memory. Here’s the thing: my grandma has been sick for awhile. We know the end is coming in the next few months, maybe sooner. I can’t fathom the idea of going to visit her in the hospital and not be able to drink when I get home–that just seems too hard. At the same time, logically I know it’s ridiculous and I should just do it now. Am I setting myself up for failure if I try to quit drinking right before I go through something terrible?

Scared

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Dear Scared,

I am so sorry about your grandmother. Drunk or sober, it’s an incredibly painful situation. And I absolutely understand the desire to have booze with you as you go through it. Why wouldn’t you? If you drink the way I drank, it’s probably been your comfort for a fairly long time. I also want to commend you on the fact that you’ve recognized that you need help with this and you want to take action. That’s no small feat and I commend you for it.