Gaslighting — a close look at people who guilt trip their loved ones.

Kiddy Vijay
Any Idea Any Style
Published in
4 min readOct 13, 2023

Gaslighting refers to a deeply manipulative and damaging behavior in which individuals deliberately manipulate the perceptions and emotions of their loved ones, causing them to question their own experiences and sanity. This psychological phenomenon, often deployed by perpetrators in emotionally abusive relationships, aims to exert control and power over the victims by making them doubt their own reality.

One of the most insidious methods employed by gaslighters is guilt tripping. This involves the intentional manipulation of another person’s guilt to change their behavior or gain the upper hand in a relationship. By exploiting the caring nature of the victim, the gaslighter instills a profound sense of guilt, thereby influencing their perception of reality.

Through guilt tripping, the gaslighter seamlessly intertwines manipulation with affection and care, creating a toxic web that is difficult for the victim to recognize and escape. The gaslighter often employs tactics such as emotional blackmail, constant criticism, and distorting reality to make the victim believe they are responsible for any negative outcome or conflict in the relationship.

The consequences of gaslighting and guilt tripping can be devastating. The victims may experience a range of negative emotions including self-doubt, anxiety, and depression. Their sense of self-esteem and self-worth erodes over time, as they internalize the gaslighter’s negative narrative. They may eventually lose trust in their own judgment and become emotionally dependent on the manipulator.

Gaslighting and guilt tripping are destructive behaviors that have severe psychological impacts on the victims involved. Understanding the dynamics of gaslighting is crucial in order to identify and address such manipulative tactics. It is important to foster healthy relationships built on trust, respect, and empathy, rejecting any form of emotional manipulation or abuse.

Story of Anna

Gaslighting is a manipulative tactic that can have profound effects on the victim’s mental and emotional well-being. When a husband gaslights his wife, it can severely impact her self-confidence and self-worth, leading to a toxic dynamic within the relationship. This essay will explore the hypothetical story of Anna and Rishi, who have been married for three years, to shed light on how gaslighting can erode the very foundations of a person’s identity.

Anna, a hardworking and ambitious woman, has always been determined to succeed in both her personal and professional life. However, ever since she married Rishi, she has found herself constantly doubting her abilities and accomplishments. Rishi, while initially supportive, has gradually started gaslighting Anna, undermining her confidence in subtle yet insidious ways.

It begins with small comments about Anna’s work or appearance. Rishi dismisses her achievements, labeling them as insignificant or unworthy of praise. Over time, these comments wear down Anna’s sense of self-worth, causing her to question her capabilities and accomplishments. She starts to feel like she can never measure up to Rishi’s expectations, no matter how hard she tries.

Gaslighting often takes the form of manipulation and lies, and Rishi is not exempt from these tactics. He frequently distorts the truth and fabricates events, making Anna doubt her own perception of reality. For instance, Rishi might insist that she did or said something she has no recollection of, leaving Anna second-guessing her own memory and sanity.

As a result, Anna becomes dependent on Rishi’s version of events. Her once strong intuition and judgment become clouded, and she starts relying on his perspective to define her own reality. This reliance further diminishes her self-confidence, as she no longer trusts her own thoughts and instincts. Instead, she subconsciously seeks Rishi’s approval and validation, perpetuating a cycle of self-doubt and subservience.

Gaslighting also involves isolating the victim from external support systems, and Rishi is aware of this tactic’s power. He discourages Anna from spending time with her friends or family, convincing her that they are a negative influence on their marriage. By cutting her off from these trusted sources of support, Rishi further diminishes Anna’s self-confidence, leaving her feeling isolated, vulnerable, and dependent on him alone.

Also, Rishi engages in gaslighting by attacking Anna’s emotions and feelings. He consistently dismisses her concerns, labeling them as overreactions or irrational, thereby invalidating her experiences. Anna begins to question her own emotions, believing that they are indeed unreasonable or unfounded. She suppresses her feelings, convincing herself that she must be the problem, as Rishi constantly implies.

The cumulative impact of gaslighting on Anna is devastating. She becomes an anxious and shell of her former self, constantly second-guessing her own thoughts and actions. Her once vibrant personality is muted, as she fears any expression of individuality may provoke Rishi’s disapproval. Anna consistently seeks his validation, desperate for any shred of reassurance that she is not as worthless as she has come to believe.

Evidently, the gaslighting of a husband can have a profound and destructive impact on his wife’s self-confidence and self-worth. In the case of Anna and Rishi, their three-year marriage becomes a toxic environment that systematically erodes her identity. Gaslighting thrives on manipulation, isolation, and the distortion of reality, leaving Anna feeling powerless and reliant on Rishi’s approval. It is crucial to recognize and address gaslighting behaviors to protect the well-being and mental health of individuals like Anna, who find themselves trapped in a cycle of doubt and insecurity.

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Kiddy Vijay
Any Idea Any Style

In spite of erroring reasons spite, whatever is, is just right. Life coach, Nature-lover, writer, poet, homeschooling mom, dreamer, believer, bibliophile