How One Single Mom on Welfare and Recently Divorced Made It to the Top of Her Profession
The inspiring story of what to do when self-doubt creeps into your life.
Imagine being recently divorced with a child. No income in sight and no job. Oh, and fighting mental illness at the same time.
What do you do?
Well J.K. Rowling was exactly in that situation. Her story as a writer is so inspiring, I had to write about it.
What to do when self-doubt starts to eat at you.
One thing Ms. Rowling said was you have to look at your situation honestly and get to work,
“You’ve got to work. It’s about structure. It’s about discipline.”
From 13 Writing Tips from J.K. Rowling by Sadie Trombetta on Bustle.com 9/6/16
Sometimes you have to do an honest assessment and plan how you will get yourself into a better situation.
Maybe becoming a multi-million-dollar author is a little far-fetched, even Ms. Rowling probably didn’t expect the results she got but you have to rely on yourself.
No one is going to spend a ton of energy on your behalf unless you believe you can correct your present course. If you’re on rock bottom, then that is a great place to start building your empire.
Planning is one thing you will hear over and over if you read her interviews. You can’t just wander aimlessly. You have to have a plan.
Start your day with a plan. A routine that helps you get things done and inspires you to work hard all day.
Responsibility is key when you are fighting self-doubt.
James Clear wrote about responsibility and how J.K Rowling grasps it clearly and with purpose. She selected herself to work her way out of this, no one else.
The “Chosen Ones” Choose Themselves by James Clear talks about how Ms. Rowling did this in her own words:
“Failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was and began to direct all my energy to finish the only work that mattered to me. Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed in the one area where I truly belonged. I was set free, because my greatest fear had been realized, and I was still alive, and I still had a daughter whom I adored, and I had an old typewriter, and a big idea. And so rock bottom became a solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.”
— J.K. Rowling, 2008 Harvard Commencement Address
James says, “You have to bet on yourself when you feel like a failure”. That is very hard to do my friends.
When you feel like a failure you are just frustrated and weary. Frustration and weary are two of the biggest obstacles I know.
We all know at Medium that it takes perseverance to make a living at writing. Perseverance will enable you to dissolve the issues that make you feel like a failure.
This has to be a rock-solid commitment from your core values, or you will fail.
Sometimes when we have the chips all in and our back is against the wall, we perform the best.
This was the result Ms. Rowling got when she decided this was going to work for her.
What it’s like when you are at your lowest point.
It’s very lonely being a writer because we all spend a ton of time alone writing, thinking and planning.
Things change constantly.
We get to where we are comfortable and something changes, but we can still succeed we just need to think our way through to come up with answers. Yes, there are always answers.
I think Facebook Groups help you keep your loneliness at bay when you see other writers are struggling with the same fears you are trapped in.
Some days are better to just grab your laptop or writing pad and go somewhere like a coffee shop or the park. It helps to engage with strangers in a variety of locations to get you out into life. It really helps your creativity as well as overcome self-doubt.
I can’t explain why but being outside or in a different location gives you a shot of confidence like nothing else I know.
Another tip is engaging with close friends or relatives. Maybe talk about upcoming events you are looking forward too. Anything except writing or self-doubt.
I know when I talk with my wife during the day, I feel like I have a partner who understands me, and we pick each other up every time we see each other, which keeps self-doubt at an arm’s length so I can get stuff done.
Reading is a huge help for me.
It’s what I love about Medium. I get to read a lot which keeps my mind chugging along with ideas to write about.
Other writers inspire me and help me be a better person just with what they write about. Sometimes I read about others and there struggles and how they overcame a diverse set of circumstances. I apply those tips to my life and my writing.
I also read outside of Medium a great deal.
I like to read about other writers and get ideas and tips to make my writing better.
I also read for pleasure and have some favorite authors like everyone. John Graham, John Forsyth, etc.
I find a great place in my mind when I read good writing. It motivates me to write.
Another thing I do to fight off loneliness.
I like to draw or paint. To me, the creative juices really flow when I am doing my art. The calmness that my mind gets into is like something I can’t get enough of and think about a lot.
Sometimes learning a new technique makes me feel like I have climbed a mountain.
It is the same feeling I get when I write and submit my draft on Medium only to learn that the editors liked it and it is being curated.
The Takeaway
These are the things that keep me going and wanting to write. I believe that like many others I can make a small living out of this if I keep growing and planning my strategies.
I’m not as far down the ladder as J.K. Rowling was but like you, I’m plugging away every day and plan on reaching my success soon.
