Hire Me To Punch Down Your Scripts
Is your movie script so funny and filled with jokes that it makes nearly no sense? Do you have characters that are wonderfully zany, but don’t know how to give them basic qualities like physical descriptions or names? Does every scene of your script begin with: “INT. PLACE WHERE JOKES ARE MADE”?
If so, I’m your man!
I’ll punch down your hilarious screenplay by adding realistic and believable who, what, wheres. Sure, one-liners and zingers are great, but I’ll make them hit even harder by giving them context. Instead of Funny Guy #1 quipping with Funny Gal #2 in an amorphous environment, I’ll give it a quick punch down and make it John the Policeman quipping with Sarah the Policewoman in a police station. Just like that, the movie makes sense and bigshot executives will be opening their wallets to hand you their limitless credit cards made from pieces of the Hollywood sign.
Have a side-splitting joke, but it only works written out? Instead of just cutting to a black screen with the text of the joke, I’ll put that joke on a sign at a place that normally has a sign! Like a church or a bank or a sign store! Viewers will love the joke and how it exists in a realistic circumstance. Remember, the movie Airplane! doesn’t happen in a vacuum. It happens in an airplane, and that’s why it’s so good.
Realize that with me you’ll be in good, trusted hands. I’ve puncheddown all of the funniest films: Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore, The Waterboy, and The Wedding Singer, to name only the ones I remember.
Fun fact: When I first got the script for The Wedding Singer it was just a list of funny words and sounds that I puncheddown into a logical narrative. Don’t bother asking Adam Sandler if that’s true, he’ll just lie like he always does.
Stop waiting to be the next Judd Apatow! Send me your script and become him (I’ll punch down whatever your goofy name is by writing Judd’s in)!
Please email all scripts to SandlerIsALiar@earthlink.net and attach a picture of a check for $200.00 made out to the above email address!
I look forward to setting your script in a police station!
