“The men are going to look anyway.”
I took a dance performance workshop recently and one piece of advice stuck out in my head: If you want to get booked for events more, make sure the kids and women are happy.
“The men are going to look anyway.”
Of course, this advice is talking about cishet men. But it immediately rang true, and also ran counter to a lot of what I had been taught.
Who does most event planning? Probably women. Who appreciates a performance the most? Probably the children.
I think a lot of women walk through life concerned about pleasing men. I know I did for a while. But the truth is, if you’re a woman who exists, you’ll have some kind of male audience. It might not be pleasant…they might be ridiculing you, telling you to be sexier, to do this or that, to lose, to gain, to cover up.
When I post on TikTok, the male audience is right there ready with their comments. Sometimes it feels like they lurk on the #feminism tag just to leave nasty comments.
I don’t write for kids. I thought that mainly women would read this blog, but according to the data I have and my tip jar, my readers are mostly men.
This has surprised me, in a pleasant way. I truly didn’t think so many men would care about what I thought about certain issues. Maybe because I thought my role was to perform someone cute, giggly, and more agreeable.
So I guess the men will look anyway…but instead of performing for them, I’ll keep looking for new versions of myself and presenting her to the world.
That’s a dance in itself.
