Recognizing covert manipulation in your relationships so you aren’t strung along

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The fact that we tend to walk around assuming that a good person is the one who is altruistic, or who appears harmless is a misnomer on so many levels. We’ve been conditioned to think and believe that if someone is kind to our face, then they must be acting with our best interests behind our back.

It is this very misconception that keeps covert manipulation in full swing, where we’re only finding out in…


Finding the good in the bad for your personal growth

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The Good

Raise your hand if you’ve ever experienced the highest of highs in a relationship. These are the relationships where everything falls perfectly together, where you’re both perfectly in sync, and everyone is saying you’re the perfect couple.

These relationships are a pretty rare find when there’s an authentic connection — authentic being the operative word.

When it’s healthy, you’re happy. It’s a happiness that grows from your soul, outward. It’s seen in how you conquer the…


6 blockages that keep you stuck & how to break free

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It’s a known fact that some people are more hardwired for drama and chaos than others. No matter how smooth-sailing their lives may seem, every now and then boom…they throw a wrench in the works.

They may sabotage an otherwise stable relationship with their S.O., or have unstable and drama-filled relationships with family and friends. Even more common is sabotaging the relationship they have with themselves, thus sabotaging their chance for peace.

Their behavior…


Comparing yourself on the outside doesn’t fix what hurts inside

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Have you ever compared yourself to someone else?

…trick question, because we’ve all done it at one time or another.

Maybe your friend can eat whatever they what and maintain their physique while you’re reduced to eating lettuce and doing the One Punch Man workout daily.

Maybe you have that one co-worker who everyone calls an ass-kisser because they seem to effortlessly move up the ladder while the rest get handed a list of goals to master before their next review.

Or, maybe you keep asking yourself what your…


There’s no quick fix if you’re serious about empowerment

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Life is unpredictable. That’s part of its beauty and its uncertainty. How we handle life’s curveballs is part of our personal growth. Maybe our company downsized or we got in a car accident and are now struggling with more bills and physical therapy. Maybe we asked our partner to move out so we could both work on ourselves while strengthening the relationship — only to find out they had a hidden agenda that no longer included us in the relationship.

Maybe life just caught up with…


5 key ways to increase your autonomy

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In Ralph Waldo Emerson’s essay titled “Self-Reliance”, he argues that to be self-reliant, we need to stay true to ourselves while shunning conformity and relying on our own abilities in times of adversity.

Makes sense, right?

A self-reliant person should be able to handle their own needs. They should know when to make adjustments as needed and to continue striving for individualism by trusting themselves, their judgement and their intuition.

Yet, nearly two centuries after Emerson’s essay…


Why we get stuck thinking we aren’t worth a damn

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I’ve always seen it as an anomaly that those we think should have a healthy relationship with themselves are often their own worst enemy. These are the same people who can come across as humble, yet if you dig a little deeper, it’s not so much humility as much as it is a complete disbelief in themselves and their value.

While we may look up to them as someone to aspire…


How to separate your roles from your identity without losing your Self

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There are two words that seem synonymous and are used interchangeably on the regular. Yet, these two words couldn’t be more different, and are independent of each other.

The two words: Identity and role.

Because they are misinterpreted as being similar — even identical — they often get misused and confused, leading to more ambiguity about their uniqueness.

All of us have ‘roles’ we have been handed — son, partner, doctor, boss, or breadwinner. Ascribed roles are the ones…


How entitlement affects relationships — it’s their way, or the highway

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Would you be able to spot entitlement in action?

You can probably remember each time someone tried pushing their way in front of you at the store because they felt their time was more ‘valuable’ than yours (and then played naive, …”Oh! I didn’t see you there!” if you called them out).

Or, maybe you know someone who always rolls their eyes if you ask them for the smallest favor…


Understanding how comfort can slide into complacency and affect all areas of our lives

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Feeling stuck or trapped is one of the worst experiences in the world. It’s the feeling of mental fogs and creative blockages. It’s the feeling of limiting beliefs that are led by our inner critic whose goal is to shut us down and keep us under its thumb. And, it’s about toxic behavior, often learned in childhood for survival, which has now become automatic habit, perpetuating the same-old, same-old.

Groundhog Day.

What makes feeling trapped or stuck so horrible is that there’s no perceivable way out of it. We become…

Armchair Analyst

At the Intersection of Analysis & Armchair Psychology. Writer/Editor: Dr. Annie Tanasugarn

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