Writing is Therapy.
Like the act of stretching your muscles, the process is worth it. You may find yourself at times not anticipating the exercise, but you know it is good for you. Keep the end satisfaction in mind to initiate the act of writing. Soon your mind will follow and you will enjoy the practice throughout the entire process.
As much as I can, I write what I am thankful for and how much I have grown as an individual. This has been a wonderful practice first thing in the morning.
My latest reflection is that I am thankful for hardships.
This summer I grew through some challenging times. I temporarily lost love, friends, and an upstart business within the same timeframe. Through a lot of alone time, I decided to observe my incorrect definition of “losing”.
What have I actually gained from heartbreak?
I realized it was actually an experience of triumph. I learned that you can’t quit when you seem to fail, but rather, you learn from my failures and returned to love. Love is a gift we can always give.
Through heartbreak, I have observed and re-ignited my concept of love and appreciation for the feminine energy. I have been reawaken to the appreciation, accountability, and joy that comes from the women in my life. I am more conscious of their purpose, ways, and strengths. I am a product of a brave mother who’s love empowers me through every decision I make. Her perseverance is one that many warriors cannot match up to.
There were times where I considered interactions with women “too emotional.” The real problem is that I wasn’t approaching their feelings with enough strength. I have learned how to be free and loving even in the “chaos” of another woman’s emotions. Like wrestling a steer or surfing ocean waves, mastery involves blending with a woman’s powerful energy and feeling the rise and fall of the moment, without lapsing in presence for a second. It is inevitable that you will get stamped on by the steer, swamped by the ocean, and hurt by women. This is how you learn. You get back up, dust yourself off, swim to shore, and turn and face your woman again. The only options I have are fear or mastery.
I have learned to keep my breath full and body strong in challenging moments. Keep my attention present. No matter what a woman says or does, give her love.
The game of life is to find each situation workable, to transform each occasion through the magnification of love, to give your fullest gift in every moment, and to have no attachments to the outcome, knowing it’s all going to rise and fall and rise again. Be a good man towards women, be kind, and be of integrity. Heartbreak will come and leave like any guest in your life.
What have I learned from getting out of touch with great friends?
I have remembered that kindness is what I appreciate about friendship. Replicate that with each person you interact with and treat them as a friend, even if you just met a stranger. Be honest, be open, and be there. I am reminded too often that our friends can leave this state at anytime. Fear not their passing, but the regret that you could have been more present and kind. They deserve that level of attention.
What have I learned from leaving a business I started?
I have gained the insight of better business practices, strategy, and vulnerability. I am humbled greatly by the external forces that can cause your business to not perform and survive. Remembering that you only control the internal will bring birth to better business. You will do less blaming and more focused work driven by enthusiasm. Listen, participate, help, and emulate a conscious leader you look up to. I enjoy the African proverb, “If you want to go fast, build alone. If you want to go far, build with a team.”
Seek to be around people that you deeply respect — individuals with common integrity and work ethic. Learn from them and seek to teach them. If you work along people and treat them as human beings rather than human resources, you stand a great chance climbing back up in business.
I hope you reflect on what challenges have left you grateful.
