Alexithymia & I: Exploring the Internal Environment of Emotion
I’ve always known I was sensitive, but I didn’t know the full details till now, at the age of 25…
As an autistic, there’s so much of the human condition that you come to discover over time that neurotypicals would just inherently know. Being naturally “connected” to your body is almost a privilege. It’s something autistics have to constantly strive to do. Our internal environment is so complex and sensitive, that keeping everything in check is a continuous effort we have to regulate.
I first found out about Alexithymia at the age of 21. I toyed with the idea that it did make sense that I had it, but I think at the time it still seemed a bit far-fetched. Once I got officially diagnosed with Autism in February 2024, it was one of the first things the psychologist suggested. It was such a relief to know that my suspicions weren’t just a product of overanalysing.
For a bit of background, Alexithymia is a term to describe people who have trouble with identifying emotions. The word in Greek translates literally to “No words for emotions.”
My Alexithymia, from my understanding, is that I can feel emotions very intensely, but I don’t have an inherent understanding of them unless they are analysed. Since I was a child, I learnt very quickly that journalling was a way to…
