My Journey into Design
The identity crisis
Growing up, my only real goal was to make it to 16 so I could drive on my own. Life happened to continue after that though, and I had to start figuring out what I wanted to do with my life.
I had enjoyed playing with Xanga and Myspace layouts, so someone told me I should go into computer science. Heads up — Computer Science is not the same thing. At all.
College
At my university, CS students chose a track: business applications, graphics, security, or software development, and I didn’t find myself resonating with any of them. Then, my advisor showed me that there might be another way for me — the Computer Science/Digital Media/Systems degree. (This was 2009 when this kind of degree was almost unheard of)
It was a hybrid of digital arts, media, and the computer science courses; I took classes like Animation, Digital Video/Audio Production, Writing for the Web, Human Computer Interaction, Visual Communication, Photography, etc. in addition to the standard Data Structures, Programming I, Programming II, etc.
I did fine in my CS courses and I think they are an essential part of my background, but it was my design courses that really captured me.
The Pivotal Moment
My pivotal moment was when I was in the class Principles of Human Computer Interaction making a paper prototype of software intended to help someone who was deaf — and we put it in front of someone who was actually deaf. I realized the power of design in that moment, and realized that for the most part, being a developer was too late in the game to make sure I was creating something that would really help humans.
Graduation
When I graduated I took a Software Development job, though I had emphasized I would really like to try my hand at designing.
As time passed, I found that when I designed, I felt like I was growing. When I coded, I felt like I was starting over repeatedly.
So I made one of my hardest career decisions — I left my job and started a new one as a UX designer at an advertising agency. In the job interview they told me that UX wasn’t even allowed to code. It gave me a pause, but as the job progressed, I realized that I only barely missed it.
It wasn’t a smooth transition though. It wasn’t just the move from one field to another — I felt like I had let women down (In college and at work I had been the only female programmer). It felt like I was taking the easier route — that web development was too hard for me. In short, I felt like I had failed.
I see a lot of women moving into development now; it is more encouraged than ever. But what I really want to say is that, if you find something else that makes your heart beat quicker, you become a stay at home mom, you become a content strategist, or you move into design like me — you haven’t let us down if you go chase that. You let us down if you don’t.
Ashley Crutcher is a Digital Designer at InterVarsity located in Madison, WI. She tweets at @ashleyspixels and enjoys cuddling with her cat, crafting, working out, and thinking too much about everything.
