If This Isn’t Familiar…

Been here, done this.

April Hawkins, Ask A Bitchface
Ask A Bitchface

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Photo via Pexels

I often like to come here and tell bald faced lies to my readers, saying things like, “I’ve learned my lesson”, and “I’m through with Fuckboys”, simply because I am a female version of Pinocchio, it seems.

It appears what I meant to say was, “right after this one, then I’ll be through”. Or something similar, I don’t know, I didn’t prep cue cards. I didn’t prepare anything, if we’re being honest, which is why I’m sitting here with this stupid ass look on my face, wondering how I’ve been Fuckboyed again.

That’s not true. I know exactly how it happened. Don’t let me start lying to y’all already today. Someone keep a closer eye on me, I know you can tell I’m already out of pocket.

You can say what you want about personal growth, and how people often change for the better, whatever new age wisdom you got from a plaque at the Hobby Lobby, I’m all in. I love those plaques also. However, do I believe them?

Not for a split second, and here is why; they fucking lie.

Not the actual sign, I know it’s inanimate. Damn, I’m depressed, not hallucinating.

The message on the sign. It’s all fine and good to trick myself into skipping dessert, or doing laundry today so I’m not naked tomorrow.

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April Hawkins, Ask A Bitchface
Ask A Bitchface

Author. Columnist. Activist. Poet basically since birth. Defender of dogs and underdogs, follow me on Substack: askabitchface@substack.com