You wake up in a pool of blood. What in heavens has happened to you?
You can do anything to predict when your next cycle starts. You’ve got apps that track your bleeding. You chart it, put it on your calendars. Every day is closely monitored. Sometimes you get that little hint, that bit of blood that comes out when you urinate and you know it’s time to wear a pantyliner just in case, but that doesn’t always happen. Oh, you’ve been watching. You’re waiting. You know it’s coming. You’ve even asked Siri to remind you that in twenty-eight days, it’s time.
Then your menstrual period starts a day early.
You’re in a business meeting and feel that tell-tale pop. You’re at lunch and suddenly, oh no. Minding your own business, you’re grocery shopping and feel something running down your leg. You’re at the gym, getting your crunch on and your body thinks, “Now would be lovely.” Or it’s three o’clock in the morning and you wake up in a pool of your own blood.
Suddenly you’re dashing away, to the bathroom or laundry room, wherever you need to go to handle this period that just popped up seemingly out of nowhere because, gosh darn it, sometimes our cycles are unpredictable as hell.
We can do everything ever to track and predict our cycle. In fact, we’re encouraged to do so. Irregularity can be a sign of underlying health issues, like liver disease, polycystic ovary syndrome, irritable bowel syndrome, and much more. Tracking is great and by all means, it’s necessary. But at best, we can figure out what day it’ll start. We can’t, however, figure out if it’ll be at eight thirty-five in the morning, when you’re en route to the office coffee pot and really don’t have time to deal with the unexpected.