Sweet, Bloody Baby Maker.

Part of a Series by Minna Von Walden

Hello to my sweet,bloody baby maker — sometimes you’re a real bitch. You were more of a bitch last month, but this month you’ve kind of been a bitch too, just not as much yet.

What happened to your predictability? I mean really, you used to be so simple to manage. 3:00 in the afternoon, with zero cramped warnings? Could you please stick to the first thing in the morning schedule from now on? My clumsiness was my only warning that you were even close to starting the flood.

Not only did you screw with the schedule, but you gave me no spotted alert, nothing before the beginning. It’s nice when you are nice and give me that small little hint of color before the flood. It’s nice to be prepared. What happened today?

It’s difficult to finish a work day when you bloody uterus drops an ounce of redness all at once and without warning. Thankfully I had a tampon and didn’t have to wait too long to get home and change. How about going back to the nice warnings you’ve always given me, today was bloody hell.