Being an actor is inherently one of the most challenging, yet most artistically exciting lifestyles one can choose. The constantly changing, often last-minute schedule, the risk of financial hardships, and a general fear of failure, are just a few things that this career choice presents you with on a daily basis. Perhaps the most difficult challenge of all is the mental game; fighting to stay positive and passionate while simultaneously facing rejection and doubt.
We all know the stories of the now successful A-list actors who ‘struggled to get where they are.’ These tidbits are often written off without stopping to consider how they actually felt in those moments of struggle. It is easy to look from a spot at the top and lovingly reminisce about the ‘harder years’, but to actually be IN those years? MUCH harder. Don’t forget, they most likely felt the same way you are feeling right now: tired of hearing no, frustrated at being unable to control the situation, and unsure of what your future looks like.
After days, months, and possibly even years of rejection, it is easy to get sucked into the fears and the doubts trying to determine your self-worth. You are disappointed and discouraged, but can’t quite find a person to blame or a problem to fix. Unfortunately, it’s not that simple. There are literally billions of reasons why you may not have booked the job or gotten the callback, and only 5% of those reasons you can control. What you CAN do is take control of the narrative and take action.
There are both tactical and emotional things you can do as an actor to help you get through the harder days, and seemingly never ending dry spells.
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CHECK IN with your reps to make sure there isn’t anything they need from you — I.e. updated materials, a list of unique skills, a document of recent relationships they could be utilizing. But before you do that, make sure there is nothing they’ve asked you to do that has yet to be crossed off your to-do list!
REMEMBER that if you ask your team what you can be doing and they say ‘nothing,’ it is not because they have given up on you. Your team is fighting hard and doing everything they can to get you those appointments — sometimes dry spells just happen, and there isn’t anything you can do but wait it out and be ready for when your time inevitably comes.
STRETCH YOUR MUSCLES by taking a class or challenging yourself to tape for a character that is outside of your comfort zone. It is important to always be learning and growing and stretching those acting muscles. You can’t control how often you get called in to audition or how many days you are needed on set, but you CAN control how often you get to perform. Training is a great way to not only keep your skills sharp, but also to create a safe space that allows you to do what you love.
CREATE something on your own. You are an artist; the desire to create is there, and if casting isn’t giving you the opportunity to do so, take it upon yourself. Whether that be writing a short, getting your friends together to film something (a scene, a self-tape, a dance, a tutorial video), or learning an entirely new art, it is important to nurture your inner artists. This will fuel your spirit and help to keep that spark alive. Plus, you never know what entirely new opportunities and ideas will come out of it. You may walk away even more inspired than when you began.
PLAN your post-audition experience so you leave the audition and enter a positive space. If you haven’t already watched the SAG Panel ‘Handling and Processing Rejection’ I would highly recommend it. One of the the biggest takeaways is the recommendation to schedule yourself some time to decompress from an audition. Auditions are often high stress situations; it can feel like the stakes are too great — as if this is your one and only shot to start your career and launch into stardom, and that there are a thousand things that could go wrong and only one that can go right. You can’t control any of that. What you can control is how kind you are to yourself when it is all over. Plan time after an audition to treat yourself in whatever way works for you. Maybe it is stopping on the way home to get an ice cream or an iced coffee, or making plans to meet up with a friend for drinks. It could even be as simple as sitting in your car before driving home and blasting your favorite song. We are all unique, and therefore need different things. Learning not only how much we can handle, but what we can do to help ease the hardship of varying levels of stress, disappointment, and anxiety, is vital to a healthy lifestyle.
LEARN TO GROW by adapting a growth mindset. As Carol Dweck speaks on in her Ted Talk: The power of believing that you can improve; “with a growth mindset , people believe that their most basic abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work — brains and talent are just the starting point. This view creates a love of learning and a resilience that is essential for great accomplishment” (Renaissance). There are thousands of articles and videos on this theory, but what it comes down to is viewing every opportunity and — yes — every rejection as a chance to learn and grow. After an audition, ask yourself how this experience enhanced your craft, your development as an artist, and as a human — regardless of whether you book the job or not. With this mentality, no experience is a ‘failure,’ because you grew as a person and as an artist.
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It ultimately comes down to this: Be kind to yourself, and know that you can and will accomplish what you are seeking. Take a moment to feel your feelings, and then take action and grab control of your own fate. You have value to share with the world, and your worth is so much greater than whether you book a job or get a callback. I know it’s hard to believe that all the time, especially when facing months and possibly even years of rejection, but it is true. As long as you are doing everything you can be doing, the rest is out of your control. Know your value, know your worth, surround yourself with people who love and support you, and know that your time WILL come.
