You’re No One’s Missing Puzzle Piece
And vice versa
“You’re my missing puzzle piece. I’m complete.” — Katy Perry
Bullshit.
Why do so many single people tend to feel like shit about themselves and get so desperate to get into any kind of relationship? Because of this shit right there.
The notion of this lyric implies you’re incomplete without a significant other. And you’re not. You’re a whole, complete person all on your own.
You’re already cake. A great relationship is just icing on that cake. And that’s a sentiment I can get behind.
The idea that you’re missing something without a significant other in your life destroys self-esteem and self-worth, leaves you feeling empty and hollow in your being and in your heart.
It hurts, man. I know all too well.
I’ve been single far longer than I’ve been in all my relationships combined, and for an entire period I call my 30s.
It sucks to feel insufficient, off, like there’s something wrong with you. It’s a weight falsely placed on your shoulders by bullshit romantic notions.
Someone completing you isn’t romantic, it’s codependent.
Your value and importance are not attached to another person and whether or not they’re interested in you. You have value because you exist.
Same goes for “He’s my world!” Christ, I hope not. That’s just sad. People think that’s romantic. What’s romantic about making someone your world?
You know what that is? Codependence. Again.
It’s pathetic and clingy. Don’t you have a job or a hobby or your own life to attend to?
Love your person, be good to them, spend time with them, but do not be some control freak, codependent, needy, insecure martyr.
The only person who should treat another as their world is a parent to their child. And even that should have its limits (say… age 40) before it slips into needy, clingy, codependent, controlling territory. (SEND HELP)
No one completes you. You are complete.
Being in a relationship should be a bonus to your already complete, fabulous life, not your source of self-esteem or self-worth. Never put that power in someone else’s hands. That is yours alone.
Your puzzle is complete. A relationship is the gold glitter Mod Podge you seal it with that gives it that little something extra.
Let a relationship accentuate you, not define you. You are all the definition you need.
If you liked this you might also enjoy these reads!
