31 Things I Learned From 31
Published in
2 min readMay 28, 2017
- Cooked vegetables are much less likely to give you a stomach ache than eating them raw.
- People will listen to you more seriously when they find out you’re over 30.
- The skin care industry is designed to drive you both insane and into poverty.
- But also, Botox starts to make sense and you get less judgy about it.
- Splurging on hotel rooms is usually always worth it.
- Work traumas can haunt you just as deeply as romantic ones, and you will always be surprised when they bubble up again.
- Your body isn’t a temple, it’s an underground cave full of secrets and confusing tunnels.
- Succulents are hard to take care of, despite everyone’s Instagrams.
- It doesn’t matter how much you have, it always feels like everyone else has more.
- It’s OK to not love your job.
- Having diamonds only makes you want more diamonds.
- One gray hair can ruin your day.
- Realizing you meet the criteria of a job description that requires 10+ years of experience will make you feel very, very old — but also unreasonably confident and bossy.
- Being engaged is very special, but it mostly feels like you’re hanging out in that heightened part of a rom-com where the couple has been fighting a lot and may or may not break up.
- The Golden Girls really is very great.
- Reading the newspaper is important.
- Therapy is the best use of your health insurance.
- Probiotics work.
- Life is too short to feel embarrassed about trying fashion trends.
- Always get the bigger iPhone.
- Planning a wedding is everything people say it is in both the best and worst ways.
- It’s still baffling how some people get paid an insane amount of money to do, what seems like, nothing.
- Candles are not worth it.
- La La Land was just a movie.
- The girls in The Babysitters Club STILL feel older than me, even though they are completely fictional 13 years olds.
- It’s important to try to navigate yourself without using Google Maps sometimes to make sure your brain doesn’t turn to complete mush.
- People who you think have it all are still struggling.
- Group texts are SO annoying, but also how else are you supposed to maintain adult friendships in 2017?
- There’s always going to be someone older than you to make you feel young and relevant.
- Sisqo’s “Thong Song” was definitely not something I should have loved as much as I did at 14 years old.
- It’s important to have an internist.