I am not a spectrum

Self worth is on a spectrum that shifts day to day

mainly by the way

your eyes shift side to side

if you’re by my side.

But that in and of itself is a deep sadness

and I am in and of myself a deep sadness.

But I am beginning to know

I am worth more than a shifting spectrum of acceptance

based on perception

based on false narratives

based on half truths

and the truth is I am finally seeing myself clearly

And I am a not spectrum

Instead: a prism

one of light, and colors, and waves

multi faceted, depth, 3-d, living, breathing, warm, dancing in the light that filters through it

I catch colors and warmth

and not feelings

of hatred

self loathing

insecurity

especially never ‘not enough’

This prism only catches

acceptance

of myself

above all.

Not some shifting eyes that waiver from end to end of approval to non.

That’s too linear for a prismatic existence.

These lines are 3D, and they will dance.