Madelaine Talks To Men About Sexbots

What they said might surprise you (couldn’t resist, sorry)

When I think about a grinning, glassy eyed doll that is the same size as me, the first word that comes to mind isn’t ‘sexy’. Creepy, yes. Horror novella, probably. But what I really struggle with what makes them appealing to a whopping 73% of men.

So I decided to talk to my favourite guys to see what they thought.

Not these guys, but similar guys.

Madelaine’s Methodology:

These men are your standard blokes down the pub, although we’ve never actually been down the pub together because I don’t drink. Smugface. Anyway, here is a selection of what they thought about sex robots.

(I tried to say as little as possible so they didn’t feel intimidated by my feminist snarling. All the names used in this piece are wildly fake. This is just a small selection of answers, because my God, did men want to talk about sex robots with me.)

My Hardcore Research:

1. So, off the bat, would you use a sex robot?

Hugo: Yeah, probably, if only once. It would be a cool experience. I’m open minded, you can’t write stuff off without trying it, can you?

Jeremiah: No way! That would be so f****** creepy. Why would you want sex with something that didn’t move?

Victor: I guess the appeal is just that: they don’t move. It’s not something that can reject you or respond badly. (pause) but I wouldn’t use one.

2. Do you think using sex robots will have a negative or positive impact on how men see women?

Claudius: That’s a tough one. I am personally against it and believe that it will have a negative impact on humanity. Why? There are “unnatural” things around us. For example social networks and other internet sites and it, in its nature, prevents us from socialisation and sincere person to person interactions. It damages our ability to interact in a natural way, I guess.

Aelfric: I think that depends on the degree of realism of the female stand-in, the way the man viewed women before getting the doll, and whether or not the man uses it as more than for sex (Lars and the Real Girl kind of thing). That’s my general first thoughts.

Victor: Negative — will further encourage the complete sexual objectification of women and further negate any human element of sex.

Lurve or pygmalia?

3. How do you feel about men who consider them ‘girlfriends’ or ‘partners’?

Jeremiah: Why not, that’s the participants prerogative, however in the legal sense I disagree that people should be able to legally marry their sex doll as the legal framework for that inst in place.

Victor: Men considering inanimate objects ‘partners’ need Jesus.

Gribaldus: Pity? Whatever floats your boat, but if you’re in a situation where the only relationship you have is with a glorified wanksock, then it’s time for psychiatric help. Way past that point.

4. Should we legislate surrounding how these robots act and behave? (for example, regulation on the extent to which robots recreate assault or rape)

Victor: Someone at some point would probably be able to programme them to be able to do it anyway. As a safeguard, I would agree with it, but I doubt it would change much.

Hugo: If the robot does not feel like it is an individual and cannot feel emotion then you can do whatever you want to it, we shouldn’t legislate over what people can do in the bedroom, imagine if we tried to bring in legislation to prevent consensual ‘rape play’ and other kinks that are consensual roleplay of otherwise criminal behaviour.

Marco: I’d tentatively say no to this question, with the caveat that I’m not well-informed enough to know whether or not the dolls could help to reinforce negative or positive behaviours. Whilst I think that child models and models which allow themselves to be raped are again f****** weird, I would wonder whether or not that people that might otherwise perform such heinous acts on actual human beings would refrain from doing so if they were allowed to perform them on a doll instead. However, it could be the case that the dolls would instead reinforce these behaviours.

A recipe for bad sex?

5. Let’s get meta. Is it cheating to have sex with a robot?

Julius: No. It’s a robot, it isn’t a woman. We really need stop seeing these things as actual women. That’s so f****** sexist.

Mordred: Until they can move, walk, and respond to complex conversation then they are just expensive sex toys.

Claudius: People in healthy relationships tend not to need nor want it from another source. It would probably just drive people who are already emotionally and sexually frustrated deeper down the rabbit hole.