On being a woman men aren’t ready for.

The phone rang on a chilly afternoon. Slightly surprised, I took a deep breath and played it cool. Pull yourself together, I thought. I was ready. I had been waiting for this exact moment for quite some time and now was my chance to finally say how I felt.

Hello! I said with a smile. Small talk ensued and I felt the nerves growing faster in the pit of my stomach like I was totally in way over my head.

Me: So I want to share something that’s been on my mind ever since you called me last week saying how much you appreciated me and respected me….. You know I have really grown to like spending time with you a lot …. I’m not sure if this is for you or not, but if I had to choose becoming serious with anyone it would be you.

I smiled whew, I said it.

Him: “This is really interesting. . . What if my response to you was No?”

Shocked doesn’t even begin to describe the multitude of emotions that came crashing down. I mean we’re talking I had it bad, real bad there were roses, hotels, and meeting the parents. I was so sure of this one.

Tears started flowing. . . .

My ego took a hit more than anything else as my mind went into autopilot. I didn’t hear much else after that. Deep down I knew this wasn’t my only chance. The end all be all. But after being single now for almost a decade, I thought to myself, isn’t it time for my happy ending?

This is one of the prime reasons why happiness, love, encouragement, empowerment, belief, and acceptance MUST come from within. People are going to let you down, seem one way this day and change the next … but when you put yourself first over everything else then these situations and life overall won’t faze you at all.


So to all my independent women… throw ya hands up at me! No but really to all my women that men aren’t ready for. Listen up!

  1. You are enough exactly the way you are.
  2. You ARE a queen no matter what your past or present might be.
  3. You are the light to someone's darkness, without recognition. Be that light incessantly.
  4. You are loved unconditionally by the Most High. It is patient, kind…. it protects, trusts… and most importantly NEVER fails.
  5. YOU are in total control of your happy ending and in the words of r. h. sin “a strong woman too much for weak men everything to a king.”
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