Sweetie versus Mr. Martens

I have 4 1/2 years of experience working in online customer support for two different social media companies. I love my job and I’ve done everything from issuing refunds to blocking dick pics, but one thing has remained constant:

When I leave my full name out of my messages, and just use my last name, men assume I am also a man.

And they treat me better.

Lisa is a ‘Sweetie.’ Lisa is a ‘Honey.’ If she doesn’t do what you want, you should say ‘Can I talk to your boss, my dear?’ Sweetie is the person who really should be doing something like Twitter updates and not, say, technical support.

But Mr. Martens is fair. Mr. Martens is ‘just doing his job.’ Mr. Martens is ‘probably right.’ Mr. Martens is a lot more competent than Lisa. His answers are the same, but he’s not as emotional. He’s also more clear.

Men don’t get mad at Mr. Martens. They are resigned to his verdicts. They are apologetic. They are understanding.

Sweetie and Mr. Martens are the same people using the same brain and producing the same results. Both Sweetie and Mr. Martens will block an inappropriate photo, but when Sweetie does it, it’s because she’s a vindictive, feminist bitch, and probably a liberal snowflake. It’s not like she’s never caught a dick before, so what’s the problem? You should talk to her manager. He will straighten her out (that’s what they assume, anyway).

When Mr. Martens does it, he’s just doing his job, and if it were up to him, he probably would have let it stay up -wink, nudge-. Mr. Martens is that cool of a guy.

I write stuff. Check out my books. Or head over here if you don’t wanna read that much, but still like my style and want to show love.