How To Use Vulnerability in Your Writing and Your Business
Why it’s a powerful tool for personal growth
I started blogging nearly 14 years ago, in August 2007, just a year after my daughter was born. If you ask me now why I started blogging, it was thanks to three people — my daughter, my husband, and my mom.
What started as a journal for me to talk about my life as a parent quickly evolved into this safe space for me to share my parenting failures and seek succor from fellow parents who were on similar journeys.
My readers and I became friends — deep, close, personal friends, who could talk about so much without being judged.
My Daughter’s Birth
Giving birth to my daughter was simultaneously the most exhilarating and the most humbling experience of my life. We’d waited a few years to try for kids only to be told that it would be difficult to actually conceive since I had PCOS.
After a year of trying and also going through some fairly painful procedures (that included hysterosalpingography) my husband and I decided that we’d stop trying to get pregnant. It was exhausting for me, physically and was taking a toll on us both, emotionally.
We stopped all treatments and doctor visits.
So it was with a very pleasant sense of joy that I found out I was expecting, in November 2005. Even the doctor was surprised when she saw the positive pregnancy test and admitted that she had no idea how it had happened, given my history.
My daughter is truly a miracle, in more ways than one. And her presence is something that I treasure every living day, even if there are some days when I feel like a total failure, as a parent.
I say this because, five years after she was born, in February 2010, I lost a baby due to a chemical pregnancy. And then again, in February 2017, I miscarried an 8-week fetus that was just not viable and wouldn’t take to my body.
I remember the crushing sense of loss, both those times.
In fact, it was even worse in the latter, since I was laid up in bed for 6 weeks after the fact and had dangerously low hemoglobin levels that required a blood transfusion to set it right. But what those losses, as well as the gains, teach me every day is a far more important lesson that I try and bring to my own writing regularly:
The power of open, transparent, and vulnerable expression.
The Power of Vulnerability
Vulnerability is a superpower and the ones who tap into it are often amazed at the returns. The best part is that being vulnerable in your writing helps you connect with the deepest part of yourself.
The more I wrote about the parts of my life that felt raw and emotional, the more I found it to be cathartic. I was no longer holding back on the emotions that bound me tightly; instead, I allowed them free rein and let them release the pressure they held on my chest and my shoulders.
Writing about my miscarriage was an extremely painful thing to do, especially since it would mean that I revisited the entire episode through my words. But not writing about it meant that I had to deal with it inside the recesses of my own mind and that was far more painful than anything else.
Extending Vulnerability to My Business
Launching my business in 2018 was exciting and life-changing, but it also came with so many struggles. It was only when I faced those struggles through my writing that I could truly process what they meant. And the more I explored the vulnerable side of my business growth, the more I connected with the people who were meant to find me and my work.
I wrote this piece on how I stopped following the herd as it is something so very close to my heart. And it shows when you read it.
What My Vulnerability Teaches Me
It is incredible how abundant the lessons from the Universe can be, if only we stay open and receptive.
My vulnerability allows me to explore all those parts of being a mother, a woman, and a business owner and take ownership of those roles, unapologetically. If I were to try and sweep the overwhelm under the carpet I’d find myself in a constant state of stress or trying to keep up appearances.
My vulnerability also taught me another important lesson: I don’t have to divorce my parenting from my business. It’s who I am; it’s everything that makes me whole.
Embrace the vulnerability and see where it takes you on your journey as a business owner, a parent, or just a regular human being.