My 3 Biggest Regrets of Corporate Life
I wish there was an “undo button” for life
Having spent 22 years in corporate life, I have very few regrets, whether it is on a personal or professional front. My work allowed me to meet different people, learn important life lessons, and, in some cases, influence lives.
Since April 2020, I am pursuing my work as a management consultant, and my passion for writing as a solopreneur and loving how one influences the other gives me busy hours but fulfilling days.
But could I have achieved this earlier when I was in corporate life? Logic says no, as in corporate life, there is no time to pursue your passions or make time for “self-love” as you constantly fight deadlines and project schedules.
However, when I sat down to write this post, I realized a few things that stopped me from pursuing these self-love habits while I was working, lack of time being on the top.
The Corporate Whirlpool
I call the corporate world a whirlpool. It’s very easy to get sucked in this whirlpool of meetings, deadlines, and egos where your promotions and pay packet seem to define your “Happy state”.
During the early days of my career, I got influenced by this rat race and felt that any time I spent on myself took away time from my work, which would make me lose out. Thus the days were stretched with lots of learning and new projects, which fueled the mind with a lack of awareness of going beyond.
Then came my first daughter after 8 years of marriage. Since she was an IVF baby hence a very precious child for us, my focus got equally divided between my work and my daughter hence leaving me no time for myself. Two years later, we had our second daughter, and my hands got fuller.
Honestly, I was cruising along well, managing home, two daughters, and hectic work life, which I was and still am very passionate about. I did not think I was missing out on something as I was busy juggling these three roles, which was my world.
I was happy in my bubble of self-made choices because I was convinced that I cannot do anything else because of these three reasons.
1. Lack of time
2. Two small kids
3. Hectic corporate life
The Big Migration
In Oct 2019, we moved to Singapore from Mumbai, and I took a sabbatical from the corporate world. After 22 years of running after deadlines, packed days with corporate meetings and school assignments, life suddenly slowed down. There were new routines to be set as my empty calendar stared at me.
I decided to fill it with all the things that I could not or did not do for all these years. And I soon realised what I was missing.
So, if I reflect back on my 22 years of corporate life, what are my biggest regrets, and what will I do differently if I had a choice again?
1. Not Finding Time To Nurture a Hobby
We all like to indulge in something or the other in our free time. Whether it's music, dancing, gardening, singing, etc. But I never nurtured a hobby, and I don’t remember why. I probably did not feel the need, or nothing got my fancy during my growing up years which I wanted to pursue.
As I grew up, my focus was always studying and making a career, and all other activities were mere distractions. In hindsight, this was a big mistake.
And then after marriage, it was managing home and work and then my girls came along. Not having time was always an excuse.
It took me so many years and probably a timely break to realize the importance of having something you like to do apart from work which rejuvenates your mind and enriches your soul.
We may think that we are nurturing our hobby while all the while our hobby is really nurturing us.
Pursuing a hobby helps you live in the present. That's what I released when I started painting. On a normal day, there are zillion thoughts going through my mind. But during my painting session, I am only thinking about the painting and how the various colours are coming alive on the canvas. I am truly living and enjoying these moments without bothering about what will happen next in my life.
Isn’t that’s what we want to achieve in our lives ultimately? Pursuing a hobby allows us to achieve this, even if in small doses. And this one addiction has no side effects.
2. Not Going Out With My Girlfriends and Nurturing Those Relationships
I am frankly not a very outgoing and extrovert person who makes friends instantly. I take my time to open up to a stranger and accept a person as a friend. But once I do, I don’t hold back and am committed to it.
I have been blessed with some amazing friends, and all my friendships are very important to me. But unfortunately, I was not very regular in staying in touch.
My excuse of not having time was valid till my daughters were small, but after they were in their teens, I could have taken some time out for my friends. The only time I went out was as a couple with my husband’s friends, which were not too bad but going out with your girl gang is different.
But I was so caught up in office and housework that I did not think it was important till I moved out of the country.
Having said that, I am trying to make up for that lost time and opportunity now, but for all of you who think twice before that girl’s night out, go for it.
3. Not Realising the Importance of Nurturing Oneself Through Meditation
I was always a very spiritual person and believed in a supreme power or energy that makes the world go around. I did pray every night but was not into meditation. I started doing meditation 4 months back and since then felt a sense of calmness inside me.
Meditating does not change the situation but changes your reaction and outlook towards the situation
When you make decisions or take action from a calm and balanced state of mind, you have better outcomes.
It also helps you put things and events in your life in perspective and thus helps you accept reality gracefully and with gratitude.
I wish I had incorporated meditation in my daily schedule during my corporate life. It would have certainly helped me to be a better person and a more balanced decision-maker.
Concluding Remarks
Self-love is a prerequisite for receiving love from others and the universe. While treating others with love and compassion comes naturally to us, remember to treat yourself with the same respect and kindness.
Immense self-love is not selfish, nor is it vain, self-love allows you to overflow love to others and contribute far more than you could without the strong foundation self-love brings.
Having said that, I also believe that things come in their due course and every event/realisation has its time etched in our life for the right reasons. For me, I guess this was the right time, and I am so glad that I have found my calling.
And for all of you who are reading this post, try incorporating these in your work life right away and see the difference in the quality of life and the output of your work.
Remember, we don't have anyone to blame except ourselves for the life we choose.
