Warning! Your Business Partner is Playing You

6 Tell-tale Signs Everyone Should Know

We can all think of one situation where we have had the thought, “are they playing me?” Although when we say this to ourselves, we may be using a slightly more explicit verb. Whether profane or clean, I can bet that the thought came in swiftly, made your heart skip a beat or two, and then it quickly vanished. Only because you weren’t ready to accept the clear cut answer: yes — you are being played.

Now, let’s keep it real; everyone will experience the role of the fool at least once in their life. Today, I am focusing on being played in the game of business. The kind of game that impacts your entire life. If you are starting a business, currently in business, or thinking about going into business, with someone else… this article is for you.

Take it from someone who had to learn the hard way. Here are a few tell-tale signs that you are being played.

1. You begin to question if you are being played. Gut feelings should NEVER be ignored, trust me. For some of us, we can feel when something isn’t right. Your stomach drops, your body sends your brain a signal, or your inner-knowing flags you to question the situation. If something feels icky, it most likely is. Especially when you are dealing with someone you trust. If something is off, trust your vibes because energy doesn’t lie.
2. Your questions go unanswered. If you ask a friend, family member, business colleague, associate, or partner about your business and they don’t give you an answer, take note. Obviously if your question is of a sensitive or confidential nature, you’ll need to vet this further. However, if it is regarding day-to-day business that normally would elicit an honest and prompt response, they are trying to keep you in the dark.
3. They want access to everything, but won’t share the transparency. Guess what? Transparency doesn’t work if it is one-sided. That is called a mirror. And when your partner wants you to be transparent, but aren’t willing to do the same… it is because they are looking in a mirror that only shows themselves — they only want to see themselves, you are not part of their bigger picture. In my case, I was responsible for developing the marketing funcitons of the business. This was my background, and completely outside of my partner’s wheelhouse. Once the platforms had been built, and accounts were established, I was consistently asked for my passwords to everything. And once provided, things really begin to get interseting.
4. They call you sensitive. When you begin to ask questions, or answer their endless questions from a place a power, your partner shows their narcassistic core by responding with, “you are just too sensitive.” This is wrong for so many reasons (which I will most likely address in a future article). They aren’t anticipating being called to the carpet, so they become defensive, because they are hiding something. You are partners. You agreed to work together. And this means that you are each within your right to ask questions without the fear of being criticized. Plus, coming at someone’s sensitivity is beyond outdated. And it says far more about them — then the person they are criticizing.
5. You’re no longer included in the conversation. This is a big one, and should be your sign that it is time to re-evaluate everything. In my case, this was during the initial days of the COVID pandemic. The doors to our business were closed, and I was no longer included in the conversation about what happens next. I was iced out. If, for any reason, conversations about your business begin to happen without your involvement, it is time for you to consider your options.
6. The legal documentation is always “in progress.” If you have to ask about the operating agreement, or membership paperwork more than once, hire an attorney. Begin to document everything, and start to accept that this isn’t going to work out the way you had planned. In writing this, it seems obvious. But when you are working with someone that you trust, you want to believe that things are going to work out. And sadly, not everyone has the best of intentions. Some people lose their moral compass, and have calculated plans to take advantage of your skillset.

If you haven’t figured it out yet, I started a business with a colleague (and friend) and it ended badly — for me. There were many red flags, but I ignored them because I didn’t want to believe that I was being played. I didn’t want to believe that someone would be taking advantage of me. Even though I knew that this person had a history of manipulation. I thought I was in too deep and that there was no way out, so I allowed things to play out, hoping that something would change. And something did change, I was no longer part of a business that I built from a concept to bringing in more than $20k in its’ first month. To say the least, it was an expensive lesson.

The bottom line is that if you begin to question someone’s intentions, you need to follow that inquisition until you have an answer. Although it may be the most uncomfortable conversation of your life, you need to express your concerns and document everything. The failure to do so could result in you losing everything.

Take it from someone who learned the hard way — you are your ONLY advocate in business.

Take a Second Look

Lisa is a transformational life coach who is passionate about helping others build their confidence in order to play big, own who they are, and step into their authentic selves. Lisa believes that behind those that have it all, is a coach dedicated to their success. She works with hustlers who are open to exploring their true nature and live their best lives.