Author Nikki T Anthony: Here Are The Things That Happened in My Childhood That Impact How I Lead Today

An Interview With Cynthia Corsetti

Cynthia Corsetti
Authority Magazine
Published in
13 min readOct 11, 2023

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Practice Empathy- There was a point in my life when I made all the wrong decisions, yet someone had enough compassion to say all the right things to me at a time when I needed it the most. My choices weren’t judged because empathy was practiced. I believe that an empathetic leader understands the importance of connecting with the emotional needs of the people around them. When someone practices empathy, they are exercising understanding the needs of the people who rely on them the most for support.

In this introspective and reflective series, we would like to explore the intricate web of experiences that form the leaders of today. Childhood, being the foundational stage of our lives, undeniably has a profound impact on our development and the leadership styles we adopt as adults. Be it a lesson learned from a parent, a childhood hobby that cultivated discipline, an early failure that fostered resilience, or even a book that opened their minds to vast possibilities; leaders often have deep-seated childhood experiences that echo in their leadership narratives today. For this interview series, we are talking to seasoned leaders across various industries who share personal anecdotes and lessons from their childhood that have sculpted their leadership philosophies today. As part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Nikki T. Anthony.

Nikki T. Anthony is well known as the multi-faceted Author of young adult novel The Price We Pay, serial entrepreneur, literary consultant, and most importantly her own resilience of overcoming challenges. She transformed her personal experiences of being an underserved troubled teen, into being a motivator for the marginalized. Not allowing the product of what was once known as an impoverished environment to stop her, she pursued a career within the publishing industry.

Nikki actively and proudly promotes youth advocacy for teen girls by sharing her own testimony through motivational speaking. She strongly believes that sharing passions, fears, soaring highs, crashing lows, and hardships with youth allows her to not only find common ground between the two, but also bridges the communication gap amongst both adults and teens.

Her enthralling life experiences, and persuasive stories demonstrate to teen girls that overcoming challenges can be transformed into a skillset, in opposed to being seen as obstacles.

Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series. Before we dive into our discussion about leadership, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share with us the backstory about what brought you to your specific career path?

First and foremost, thank you so much for allowing me to take part in this amazing opportunity to share my life experiences with you through your platform.

I was born and raised in Chicago, Illinois, where my love for writing sparked as a teenager. Growing up on the southside of Chicago in a housing project, I lived in poverty. I experienced and saw things there that left me to feel as though I would never amount to anything. I lived with my great-grandmother who didn’t have much, yet what little she did have she stretched those resources as far and wide as she possibly could. She would always encourage me that if I put my mind to it, I could do anything.

During that time, I knew I wanted to be something, but I didn’t know exactly what that something consisted of, so in the meantime I figured to become more than what I was doing I needed to change my environment. The real question was how is that possible with no money, little resources, and lack of encouragement from the other influences around me.

Then one day I had this epiphany; I loved to read, and what better way to explore different environments than through literature. I found a way to escape my everyday reality by visiting the neighborhood public library which allowed me to explore different environments through reading fiction. I would visit one library every day from sunup to sundown exploring new worlds. When that one closed for the day, or if I was escorted out because my friends came in causing trouble, I’d find a way to ditch them, and travel to the nearest neighborhood library. That was the beginning of how I started to use literature as leverage to better my life circumstances.

What do you think makes your company stand out? Can you share a story?

My lifelong mission is to give back to young adult females, by inspiring them that when empowered she too can rewrite her story. It’s the driving force behind my book tour titled Girls Like Me which also serves as a seed tour for the youth. Throughout my career I’ve been transparent about how troubled my own childhood was. Not only was I a high school dropout, but I was also a runaway teen.

The troubles I experienced growing up, many would be ashamed to speak about but in my case, I wear those scars shamelessly because those pitfalls are the exact things that built my character. I want to teach young adult females that its not how you start, all that matters is how you finish.

You are a successful business leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?

The three-character traits that I believe were the most instrumental to my success would be my ambition, the enthusiasm I had despite my surroundings, and most definitely my optimism.

Waking up every day with a hopeful attitude that a change is on the horizon isn’t an easy thing to do when everything around you demonstrate otherwise. There were days when I didn’t have the proper toiletries, I didn’t look like the other kids at school which ultimately resulted in me dropping out of high school, I didn’t know where my next meal would come from whenever I ran away from home, yet I whole heartedly believed the outcome of my life would one day be favorable.

To believe that I could turn things around in my life was bold of me. It was daring. Often it was even scary, but I knew it wasn’t impossible. Knowing there was even the slightest possibility I would prevail fueled my ambition. My mentality became my reality in opposed to my reality altering my mentality.

Leadership often entails making difficult decisions or hard choices between two apparently good paths. Can you share a story with us about a hard decision or choice you had to make as a leader? I’m curious to understand how these challenges have shaped your leadership.

Entrepreneurship is hard. That’s what I’ve learned. But I’ve also learned that making difficult decisions as a leader can prove to be an even harder task.

For me one of the hardest choices I had to make as a leader was to go back to work post covid. I’m one of the individuals who took a hard hit during that trying time. Returning to corporate America was an extremely difficult decision, yet laying off those who have families or even not being able to make payroll could have been even more catastrophic.

Ultimately as the leader I knew I had to make a difficult decision and return to the workforce just so I could pay my employees. I made the decision to take the hit because that’s what authentic leaders do. We take control by jumping into action. For quite some time the thought of transitioning from business owner to employee made me feel like a failure, then I suddenly remembered that I’ve been at lower points, yet I found my way out of those situations. As a leader I had to remember that it wasn’t about what I did from 9 to 5, all that mattered was the work that I committed to do from 6 to midnight. That work consisted of the setting out to do what I’ve always felt closest to-becoming a motivator for the marginalized.

Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the primary focus of our interview. Let’s start with a simple definition. How do you personally define “leadership?”

Leaders motivate others to do something new. Something better. My goal has always been to not only inspire others to do their best work, but to be the best version of themselves while doing it. For example, returning to the work force was a hard decision for me. Little did I know was that what I saw as humiliating, those around me saw it as commendable. They looked at it from a different viewpoint. Though I didn’t feel courageous, many of them felt as though what I had set out to do was quite humbling because when people share their success journey, they tend to share the rise but hardly ever do they share the real time struggles, the negative self-talk, the unbalance bank accounts, the tears that are cried at night due to the stress from the earlier part of the day, or even the sacrifices they make on a daily basis. So, when I think of leadership, I think of it as a fearless leader who has an unwavering amount of courage.

Can you recall an experience from your childhood where you felt truly empowered? How does that moment inform your leadership style today?

It was when I had awakened one day and realized that four years of my life had passed by. My eighteenth birthday had come and gone, and I said to myself one morning I don’t want to be this way anymore. I can right every wrong I’ve made and turn my life around.

The things that I once thought were fun, didn’t feel so enjoyable anymore. The decisions that I once thought were smart suddenly didn’t seem so wise after all. For the first time in my life, I had made a rational decision to be better. Even if those around me hadn’t transitioned into a better way of thinking and believing, I knew it was time for me to do better.

That day was a significant milestone for me because from that day forward I had adopted that mentality and carried it into my adulthood. That single empowering moment taught me the importance of perseverance, balance, and how to boost my own self-esteem.

Were there any role models in your early years who left a lasting impression on you? How has their influence manifested in your approach to leadership?

My great-grandmother was for sure a role model who left a lasting impression on my life. Even when I had lost my way, she believed in me and encouraged me that one day I would find my way back on the right path. She was resilient and she taught me to be the same way in my own life. Despite the passage of time and the various obstacles that were before me, I continued to face those hinderances head-on with unwavering resolve because of all the things that she had instilled in me.

Her wisdom, strength, and tenacity were all an inheritance to me. In my opinion, those character traits are more valuable than currency because one can always find a way to make more money, but having character is a skillset that can be more profitable to gold. The traits I inherited from her contribute to the way I lead today.

Many of us had a favorite book or story as a child. Is there a narrative that you were drawn to, and do you see its themes reflecting in your leadership journey?

I read a lot as a teenager. My favorite book was titled Disappearing Acts by Terry McMillan. I loved it so much that I read it at least nine times, and each time felt like the first. The novel was such a classic to me because the character Zora accepted her love interest for who he was as a person. She didn’t judge him, believed in him, and saw the best in him even when he didn’t see the best in himself.

In a sense, at that time I felt so connected to the storyline because the character’s intentions were so pure, and I see so much of myself in Zora. Not only do I tend to lead by example, but I meet people where they are. That’s extremely important as a leader because it’s an approach that requires understanding, empathy, and acceptance of an individual despite the limitations they may have been presented with.

Many leaders find that their greatest strengths arise from overcoming adversity. Can you share an experience from your early life that was difficult at the time, but you find still lingers in your thoughts and informs your actions today?

Our living conditions in the housing projects. The amount of extreme poverty that we had to endure felt almost surreal. Not having my basic needs met as a child because of income limitations I think was the biggest challenge I had to endure. Though the list of adversities is longer than I’d care to admit, I will say is that what most couldn’t even phantom experiencing, I found the strength to overcome those same experiences.

There isn’t a day that passes that I don’t reflect on the challenges that I was faced with during my childhood. I think about those things not because of the sadness associated with it, but because of the strength I endured from it. All those things not only made me stronger, but they also encourage me to keep going because I would never want my own children to experience those situations. As a result of not wanting to live that way again, I must keep going. There is no plan B.

Looking back at your childhood, are there particular ‘first-time’ experiences — like your first triumph, your initial setback, or your inaugural leadership responsibility — that you believe were pivotal in molding your leadership ethos?”

I would have to say the first time I opened a book. That was the inaugural moment where I realized I could escape my reality and experience a different world than the one I was living in at that moment. There’s an old saying that you don’t miss what you don’t know. Yet when I picked up that book for the first time, I realized I was lacking something. I was missing the beautiful city the author was describing so perfectly, the diverse group of characters that the writer had developed so eloquently, I was missing out on an entirely different world. A universe that I wanted to experience, but the only way to encounter those settings was to work for it. Go hard and work for it.

From your personal experiences and reflections, what are the ‘5 Pillars of Effective Leadership’ you believe in?

1. Practice Empathy- There was a point in my life when I made all the wrong decisions, yet someone had enough compassion to say all the right things to me at a time when I needed it the most. My choices weren’t judged because empathy was practiced. I believe that an empathetic leader understands the importance of connecting with the emotional needs of the people around them. When someone practices empathy, they are exercising understanding the needs of the people who rely on them the most for support.

2. Sound Decision-Making- The rise of covid-19 changed the world as we once knew it. It was during that turning point in my life that I needed to make the most important decision of my life; allow my business to tank or return to the workforce. Nearly three years later, and I’ve yet to say, I regret that decision because it wasn’t a choice that only affected me. It is also my belief that an effective leader understands the importance of mastering the ability to make sound decisions.

3. Demonstrate Accountability- Despite feeling as though I wasn’t provided with the basic needs during my childhood, at some point in my life I needed to take accountability for the choices I had made. Dropping out of high school, running away from home, and being rebellious were all choices I opted to make. Holding myself accountable during my childhood taught me how to hold myself responsible as a leader. It reminded me that taking responsibility, when necessary, makes for a productive leader.

4. Have Integrity- Even during my lowest point in life of doing all the wrong things, self consciously I needed to do what was right. It was important for me to be honest with myself. Being truthful and adhering to my needs to be better is a leadership trait that all leaders should practice. Integrity is characterized, and it’s something that simply can’t be taught nor bought. It’s embedded from within you.

5. Master Adaptability- Throughout both my childhood and adult life, I’ve been forced to adapt to my environment. Learning how to adjust to any environment and changing my circumstances taught me the importance of being flexible. Knowing when I needed to adapt has also educated me on how to master the pivot.

In your role as a leader, what thoughts or concerns keep you awake at night? How do these reflections guide your decisions and leadership?

The only thing that keeps me awake at night is how I can be a better version of myself. Each day I strive to be better than the day before. In my personal and professional life, I’m always finding new ways to stay two steps ahead of the curve.

You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. :-)

I would have to say a seed tour like my Girls Like Me Tour. It’s my hope to inspire young adult females that although she may have temporarily lost her way, she too can rewrite her story. Young adults generally experience a rash of soaring lows and crashing highs, and during that rough patch they just need someone to encourage them that they too will get through it.

How can our readers further follow your work online?

Readers can follow my work through my website at www.iamnikkitanthony.com, or by visiting my social media handles @nikkitanthony.

Thank you for the time you spent sharing these fantastic insights. It’s been an honor to delve into the roots of your leadership journey, and we are grateful for the wisdom you’ve shared.

Thank you so much for having me and allowing me to share my journey on your platform.

About the Interviewer: Cynthia Corsetti is an esteemed executive coach with over two decades in corporate leadership and 11 years in executive coaching. Author of the upcoming book, “Dark Drivers,” she guides high-performing professionals and Fortune 500 firms to recognize and manage underlying influences affecting their leadership. Beyond individual coaching, Cynthia offers a 6-month executive transition program and partners with organizations to nurture the next wave of leadership excellence.

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Authority Magazine
Authority Magazine

Published in Authority Magazine

In-depth Interviews with Authorities in Business, Pop Culture, Wellness, Social Impact, and Tech. We use interviews to draw out stories that are both empowering and actionable.

Cynthia Corsetti
Cynthia Corsetti

Written by Cynthia Corsetti

Author | Thought Leader | Leadership Consultant

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