Bonnie Frankel On 5 Things You Need To Overcome Self-Doubt and Build Confidence
An Interview With Stanley Bronstein
Open-mind — This skill enables you to utilize your cognitive abilities as a means for expanding and enhancing personal and professional development. This includes critical thinking, rational decision-making and problem-solving. Adopting this approach should be viewed as an opportunity for self-reflection and preparation, rather than as an indication of inadequacy. Shifting your perspective to consider doubt as an opportunity to gather information to build competency. Regular use of cognitive technique can enhance self-awareness and understanding, both of which are linked to Emotional Intelligence. This builds trust and reliability. When I went through the process of dueling with the NCAA, I learned from trial and error. There were times when I questioned my ability to be able to overcome an established corporate system. Sustaining an open-minded approach contributed to achieving my goal.
Self-doubt can hold people back from reaching their full potential, whether in their careers, relationships, or personal growth. Confidence is a skill that can be developed, but what are the most effective strategies to overcome negative self-talk and build lasting self-assurance? In this interview series, we are talking to mindset coaches, psychologists, authors, and other experts who can share actionable insights on overcoming self-doubt and cultivating confidence. As a part of this series we had the pleasure of interviewing Bonnie Frankel.
Bonnie approaches challenges with strategic decision-making by taking measured risks. Her choice to pursue more education unexpectedly guided her to a new career path. The art of running transitioned her into mastering the art of living with confidence.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dive into the main focus of our interview, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory.
Growing up as an introvert would eventually guide me to understand why I chose my family. Sooner than later in life, I would find my voice and learned to view life with humor by being active in various physical activities. The newly acquired mindset gradually rewarded me to launch to master the art of living. Listening to my mother’s ongoing issues made me take on responsibilities earlier than most of my peers. The experience empowered me to cultivate self-awareness to build strong active listening skills with sound judgment. Various exercises authorized me to foster trust and diminished my previous lack of confidence.
What or who inspired you to pursue your career? We’d love to hear the story.
Exploring the significance of personal growth by participating in a specific physical activity initially seemed minor but ultimately provided unexpected benefits for achieving a balanced mind-set. Coach Tommie Smith was the first to initiate his confidence in my unique gift as he actualized my talent. When the media interviewed him, Tommie would compare me to the, George Foreman of running as well as boast that I was his eldest athlete on the team. Taking a running class helped me discover an exercise I became passionate about and supported my learning disabilities and mental health challenges. The art of running would send me on an unexpected journey in the field of fitness.
It has been said that our mistakes can be our greatest teachers. Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?
One of my attempts in preparation to qualify for the Olympic Trials was when I trained to acquire faster times with the fastest male student athletes at Santa Monica High School. To my dismay, I was unable to surpass the highest-performing male runners. I was frustrated because my turnover matched theirs. I asked Coach Cady for an explanation of why this could not be accomplished. His reply, “You don’t have the testosterone that they have.” That piece of information never crossed my mind due to the different factors related to male and female genetics.
What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now? How do you think that might help people?
Helping others identify a suitable exercise that is best for them, and how it abstractly shifts their self-doubt to spiriting self- confidence in all areas of life which assembles a better community. Engaging in a specific daily exercise enhances the use of Emotional Intelligence whereas it accelerates achievement, good health, and creates a general joyful, meaningful life. This is a solid method to support a positive significant change in your life and master the art of living with the feeling of authority.
OK, thank you for all of that. Let’s now shift to the core focus of our interview. If someone wanted to take on a major goal — like permanently losing 20 pounds, or writing a book — but wasn’t sure they could do it, where should they start.
Align your goals with your inner purpose by implementing the components that Emotional Intelligence embraces. The remarkable method is designed to overcome obstacles and stay motivated by enabling you to recognize, understand, and manage your own emotions, as well as influence those of others. EI turns intention into action and makes informed decisions about what matters most to you. It includes managing negative emotions, such as anger and frustration, as well as positive emotions as in joy and excitement. This approach supports individuals to remain composed in stressful circumstances because EI exhilarates you to manage challenging situations with professionalism. Be sure to maintain a daily journal to track your progress and monitor goals. Incorporating your preferred form of exercise is associated with implementing an even more powerful connection to utilizing Emotional Intelligence.
How much of a role do you think belief plays in a person’s ability to succeed? In other words, how important is it to truly believe they can achieve something? Can you share a story or example that illustrates this?
Possessing faith in yourself creates an enormous impact in achieving goals. It serves as a basis for taking effective action and continuing the effort, supporting the motivation to address difficulties and maintain a perspective that emphasizes opportunities rather than challenges. Hard work, strategy, luck, and a stroke of luck are key factors. Believing in oneself is crucial because it empowers an individual to take consistent steps to never lose sight of the goal. When I challenged the NCAA, they repeatedly said, “You can’t win.” My self-assurance, combined with strategic planning, determination gave me the confidence that I could overturn the dated rule. Even when I encountered the peaks and the valleys, I remembered this quote, “It’s not perfection — it’s permission to move forward.” Dr. Wayne W. Dyers
Motivation is key to getting started, but it inevitably fades. When that happens, what strategies do you recommend for staying committed and pushing forward?.
Reward yourself by celebrating small wins. Keep a journal to track your progress on a consistent basis, visualize success, and practice mindfulness. Communicating your goals to others by applying active listening and compassionate empathy fosters a robust support network, providing constructive feedback and valuable guidance, particularly when navigating challenges. Implement resilience in your thinking because it is about bouncing back from being knocked down and, the drive to forge ahead forward until you succeed.
“What Are The 5 Things You Need To Overcome Self-Doubt and Build Confidence?”
1. Open-mind -This skill enables you to utilize your cognitive abilities as a means for expanding and enhancing personal and professional development. This includes critical thinking, rational decision-making and problem-solving. Adopting this approach should be viewed as an opportunity for self-reflection and preparation, rather than as an indication of inadequacy. Shifting your perspective to consider doubt as an opportunity to gather information to build competency. Regular use of cognitive technique can enhance self-awareness and understanding, both of which are linked to Emotional Intelligence. This builds trust and reliability. When I went through the process of dueling with the NCAA, I learned from trial and error. There were times when I questioned my ability to be able to overcome an established corporate system. Sustaining an open-minded approach contributed to achieving my goal.
2. Journal — Is a divine private method that encourages you to analyze your fears, list your strengths, and accomplishments, utilize affirmations to cultivate positive belief system. It stimulates you to contemplate gratitude and write “love letters” to yourself which builds self-appreciation and confidence. The written expression documents your progress and is written in stone. I like to set a timer and write without judgment which permits me to letting my thoughts flow onto paper to see patterns and distance yourself from overwhelming thoughts. Writing helps lower stress and anxiety while boosting self-awareness and self-compassion. You are the only one entitled to view it.
3. Exercise — By engaging in your favorite physical activity, it triggers the endorphins and dopamine release, which lifts our mood and creates a sense of accomplishment and offsets the feeling of defeat. Action as opposed to sedentary calms the fear center of the brain and strengthens the rational decision-maker, improves your focus and reduces negative self-talk. Physical activity strengthens the power of Emotional Intelligence to assist in improving skills to attain your self- assurance. My clients strive to achieve their fitness goals, identifying their progress in their physical capability and correlate with increased confidence in various aspects of life. It is mandatory that they keep a journal to confirm their observations of the process and compare it with my assessment.
4. Self-compassion — Is a trait composed of three elements: mindfulness, common humanity, and self-kindness. Hardship can lead to wisdom, resilience, and compassion. Challenge your negative self-talk with positive affirmations using a journal and the reflection of a mirror. When you use self-compassion, it discloses that you are treating yourself with the same kindness you would offer a struggling friend. When you feel the first suggestion of inadequacy, stop to “smell a rose,” encouraging your attitude to accept comfort by taking good care of yourself the very moment it begins. I tend to look at what I haven’t accomplished as opposed to what I have. When I’m feeling blue, I exercise — swimming, brisk walking, or interval running — and then write down my workout accomplishments and a gratitude list in my journal to reflect on my achievements. It works like a charm. Discover your own blend to look at what you have achieved. Make sure it is written in stone.
5. Attitude — Attitude plays a crucial role in overcoming self-doubt. A positive spin on life shapes how you interpret events, respond to challenges, and the manner you internally talk to yourself. Engaging in this process directly impacts your belief in your abilities. It can function as a teacher by promoting resilience and inner strength. Facing challenges may feel uncomfortable but demonstrates our coping skills. This leads to increased competence and self-assurance in handling future challenging situations The process transforms your spirit by making you more robust and capable. It can be compared to the likes of how a muscle grows stronger through strain. “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”. Victor Frankl. Victor He was a psychiatrist and an inspirational example of finding a way, no matter what the horrific conditions are, to choose a positive attitude to accomplish a goal. He was a Holocaust survivor, founded his Logotherapy theory inside the concentration camps.
Have you worked with any clients or patients who achieved results that went beyond what they originally thought possible? If so, could you share a story or two to inspire our readers?
When I coached cross country at Loyola Marymount University, competition was soon to begin in our conference league. One of my star athletes got pregnant and had an abortion. Being a devout Catholic, she was emotionally devastated. Overwhelmed by depression, would sometimes prevent her from showing up for practice as well as cancel at the last minute to compete in a race. I actively listened to her and spoke with her, her parents, and her sister about the importance of addressing her emotions through motion. This encouraged her to use her athletic skills constructively and increased her confidence as part of the team. The approach was successful, leading to a gradual return of her self-esteem. Another story which had a strange twist to it is when John Carlos coached me to qualify for the Olympics Trials. John was out of shape and needed a knee replacement. My commitment to fitness coupled with my goal to qualify for the Olympic Trials with an artificial hip replacement inspired him to begin his getting into shape by walking on the track each day before coaching me. He looked better, felt better and it also helped his migraines. John would eventually undergo knee arthroplasty.
Ok, we are nearly done. You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good for the greatest number of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger.
“Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.” John Wooden
We are very blessed that some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US, whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we both tag them :-)
Bo Jackson
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Bonniefrankel.com, Bonnie Frankel and Masters, Bonnie Frankel the Bonnie Rule, Authority Magazine, Facebook, Linked-in
Thank you for these really excellent insights, and we greatly appreciate the time you spent with this. We wish you continued success.
About the Interviewer: Stanley Bronstein is an attorney, CPA, and author of more than 20 books. However, he doesn’t consider any of those his greatest achievement. His most significant accomplishment was permanently losing 225 pounds and developing the personal growth system that made it possible — The Way of Excellence. As a catalyst for change, he has dedicated his life to helping others maximize their potential, transform their lives, and achieve optimal health. To learn more, you can download a free PDF copy of his latest book, The Way of Excellence Journal, at https://TheWayOfExcellence.com.
