Bret Ernst: Five Things I Wish Someone Told Me When I First Became A Professional Comedian

If you’re afraid of failure, stay home. I’m not exaggerating when I say 98% of this business is failure. Failure is not the opposite of success, it’s part of it. But, when that 2% hits, it hits hard and makes you want to do that 98% all over again.

I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing Bret Ernst, a 25-year veteran of stand-up comedy. His first national exposure was in the theatrical documentary, “Vince Vaughn’s Wild West Comedy Tour: 30 Days 30 Nights,” in 2008. Currently, he plays Cousin Louie on the hit Netflix series “Cobra Kai.” He also just released his comedy special, “Domesticated Animal,” to the follow up success of “Principal’s Office” which is currently at over 4 million views on YouTube. In addition to touring nationally, he is also a resident comedian L.A. Comedy Club at The STRAT in Las Vegas, performing Tuesday and Wednesday nights.

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Our readers would love to get to know you a bit better. Can you tell us the story of how you grew up?

I was born in Princeton, New Jersey as the middle child. My younger brother lives in L.A. now, and my older brother passed away in 2001. I attended middle school in Passaic, New Jersey before moving to South Florida for high school. Growing up, I went to 15 different schools. I was raised mostly by a single mother, who remarried again when I was 13. My father passed when I was 10.

Can you share a story with us about what brought you to this specific career path as a comedian?

As a kid, I was always in trouble. Because of how many schools I went to, this was how I made friends. I loved to make fun of kids’ moms as it’s an inner city pastime for kids, especially on the playground, at free lunch and free breakfast. I kept cracking jokes in detention, the principal’s office and in the locker room — I played football from little league all the way to college. I love to argue as well, so once I got old enough, it was a natural progression to take it to the stage.

Can you tell us the most interesting story that happened to you since you began your career?

I partied one time with a serial killer in Alaska. I went up there for a gig and found out years later that this guy had killed people. It’s crazy because it is true what they say — these people blend in. I couldn’t remember who he was until my buddy showed me the photo of us hanging out. Goes to show you that you never know who you meet!

Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?

I did a charity event in someone’s living room. Never doing that again, LOL!

Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

Honestly, there are too many to name, and it’s not a cop out to the question. From family to coaches to friends and fellow comics, so many people have been a part of who I am as a person, which I carry with me in my career.

Do you have any words of advice for others who may want to embark on this career path, but seem daunted by the prospect of failure?

If you’re afraid of failure, stay home. I’m not exaggerating when I say 98% of this business is failure. Failure is not the opposite of success, it’s part of it. But, when that 2% hits, it hits hard and makes you want to do that 98% all over again.

What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now? Where do you see yourself heading from here?

“Cobra Kai” has been such a blessing from top to bottom. There is not a single weak link as the show runners, stars, the production crew are all incredible. I am getting ready to shoot my next special by the end of the year. I’m currently in the process of developing a new series, which I’m not at liberty to discuss in further detail, but I wish I could.

What do you do to get material to write your jokes? What is that creative process like?

I’m not a big observational style writer. I tend to draw from real life and be more of a personal story teller. I like to write onstage. There are basically two types of comics — ones that write it out on paper first and then take it to the stage, and the ones who talk it out on stage first then take it to the paper later. I’m the latter.

What are your “Five Things I Wish Someone Told Me When I First Became A Professional Comedian” and why? Please share a story or example for each.

• If you’re doing it right, it takes a long time. The 10,000 hour rule is achieved 5–15 minutes at a time.
• There are over 320 Million People in America, and you only need 1% to like you and give you a dollar. If you can achieve that, you can make 3.2 million dollars a year.
• Learn how to use social media. it is the most important tool you can have.
• The same people that talked bad about you behind your back when things were looking bleak, are the same ones that brag they know you to your face when things start looking good. That goes for life in general, not just comedy.
• If you are a touring road comic and you aren’t charting jets yet, find a good, reliable and flexible airline. For me, it’s Southwest airlines. There are no change fees, they let you keep the credit if you have to cancel and they don’t charge for bags so you can bring your merch.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?

My favorite quote when it comes to creating is “It’s none of my business what you think about me.” It isn’t, and I don’t care anyway.

If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be?

Besides the obvious feed the world or world peace type response, I would say for the individual would be help someone a day that needs it, thank God for your health and family every day and “Do whatever makes you happy!” It is important to understand that you will be dead one day. Stop worrying over stuff that doesn’t matter, and stop worrying about what other people think. Go be happy — the clock is ticking!

Is there a person in the world whom you would love to have lunch with, and why? Maybe we can tag them and see what happens!

Elon Musk as he is an interesting person.

Are you on social media? How can our readers follow you online?

YOUTUBE: BretErnst

IG: @breternst

FB: Bret Ernst Comedy

TikTok @breternst

Website: www.bretcomedy.com for all social media and info on how to watch my specials