F.A.T.E. From Addict to Entrepreneur, With James Lewis Of Pleaze
Your mind isn’t always on your team: Your mind will tell you all sorts of crazy things. As much as they can be believable, they aren’t always true. Be the observer of your thoughts.
As a part of my series about people who made the journey from an addict to an entrepreneur, I had the pleasure to interview James Lewis.
James Lewis is the Founder behind Pleaze, a mobile app born from his own suffering. Once caught in the grips of addiction and mental illness, James has since redefined his story, turning pain and struggle into purpose. Drawing on firsthand experience, he created Pleaze to provide real, compassionate support to people navigating recovery.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Can you describe your childhood for us?
From my earliest memories, I’ve never felt happy. I was a quiet child who kept to myself. Throughout my life, I moved around a lot. I was born in Zimbabwe and left for Paris when I was three. At five, I moved to Ireland, and when I was ten, I had a brief stint in Zambia. My father was in the SAS (Special Air Service), which meant he was absent for much of my life. It was mostly just my mother, my sister, and me. This almost set the tone for what was about to come, constantly on the move, running away from my problems.
From the very beginning, I struggled with suicidal thoughts and felt deeply uncomfortable in my own skin. I didn’t know or understand what I was feeling. I didn’t know it was unusual to experience such emotions, so I never spoke about it. It was only when my mother discovered a picture I had drawn of myself hanging from a tree underneath my bed that someone knew something was wrong.
On the surface, it may have seemed like I had an adventurous and loving childhood, filled with opportunities. However, inside, I was slowly dying.
Can you share with us how were you initially introduced to your addiction? What drew you to the addiction you had?
I am an alcoholic, a drug addict, and a compulsive gambler. Each of these started innocently and often in the company of friends. When I had my first drink is up for debate, but my first ‘real’ drink was when I was 13. I didn’t make much of it, but by the time I was 15, I remember saying to myself, “I absolutely love this”. I knew I was going to have a problem, but I was never going to admit it. No one was going to take away the one thing that I was looking for and the one thing that worked. It numbed all those feelings I couldn’t handle. If it was going to be a problem, that was for another day.
This continued for several years, and all seemed normal and “a bit of craic”, as the Irish say. By 17, I was drinking in my room alone, and I couldn’t get enough of it; I was obsessed.
I began smoking weed in my mid-teens and wasn’t a massive fan of it (didn’t hate it either), too much paranoia. Once I finished school and went to college, the harder drugs came out to play. It was all fun and games, a lot of experimenting, but soon I crossed the line, and this was my newfound love.
Gambling was the sly and very secretive one. One I could hide and no one would know about. Although I would know, it slowly began to eat at me. I first started betting on horse racing when I turned 18. It’s quite normalised in Ireland, so again, I didn’t think anything of it. Once a week turned into a couple of times a week. A couple of times a week turned into every day, and so on.
One thing is for sure, I fell in love with all these substances and behaviours fast. They took hold of me fast. Things got bad fast. They were the answer I had been searching for. They filled that void and numbed that never-ending pain. They became the solution to my problem.
What do you think you were really masking or running from in the first place?
As I mentioned, alcohol, drugs, and gambling became my solution. Without them, I couldn’t live in reality and cope with my feelings or thoughts. With them, I could live in reality and not have to deal with my feelings or thoughts.
In other words, I was running away from myself, and boy, did I run. I even ran to different countries, hoping it would be different. Nothing changed because I brought the problem with — ME!
Soon, these anaesthetics stopped working. I had a big problem on my hands. How was I going to stop, how was I going to stay stopped, and how was I going to live without them?
Can you share what the lowest point in your addiction and life was?
Just when I thought I had hit rock bottom, I kept on digging. There wasn’t much left in the end; I had nothing and no one. Besides all of the horrible things I had done and people I had hurt, my lowest point was when the one person who never gave up on me and was always there couldn’t handle me anymore — my mother.
When I looked at her, all I could see was the pain and suffering I had caused. She told me that she couldn’t deal with me anymore and that I must leave the house. At the time, I hated her. I said to myself, I will never forgive her or speak to her again. Fortunately, today we have an amazing new relationship
Can you tell us the story about how you were able to overcome your addiction?
I don’t think there is anything I haven’t tried. Rehabs, psychiatric hospitals, addiction counsellors, therapists, medications, you name it — I’ve tried it. Unfortunately, one of the essential ingredients for recovery is pain, and I needed all of it. I was so tired of going back and fighting it after all of these years.
My dilemma was that I couldn’t live in addiction because the alcohol, drugs, and gambling stopped working, and my life got worse. I couldn’t live without my addictions because my life got worse when I was left with myself and all my problems, with no way to cope and deal with life. There had to be another way.
Well, for me, that other way was the 12-step programme. The 12-step programme allowed me to change and live without the anaesthetics. A day at a time, I apply the 12-step programme to my life. It was hard, but it got and gets easier.
How did you reconcile within yourself and to others the pain that addiction caused to you and them?
The 12-step programme is a design for living, and I needed just that because I had no way of living. It was only through this programme that I was able to live with myself, my past, and what I had done. It was absolutely essential for me to let go. I had to let go of everything.
I caused an incredible amount of pain and suffering to those around me. I felt like a terrible person, but I was just a sick person trying to get well. Through this programme, I was able to mend relationships and friendships with my loved ones, friends, and everyone I had hurt. Today, I live free from my past and live a new life with new relationships.
When you stopped your addiction, what did you do to fill in all the newfound time you had?
The great paradox of recovery is that I can only keep what I have by giving it away. In other words, I must help others if I want to stay well. I try to make it less about me and more about others now. Where I can, I try to be of service to others in addiction and in general.
I won’t lie, at the beginning, this wasn’t the case. There was a lot of gaming, hiding, crying, smoking, boredom, and throwing myself into work.
My whole life was about taking. Take, take, take, as much as I can. Today, my life is about giving. Give, give, give, as much as I can.
I’ve been through hell, and I’ve been given a chance to live today, so I do whatever I can for others.
What positive habits have you incorporated into your life post addiction to keep you on the right path?
There are endless things I have learned and habits I have added to my daily life, but I’ll give you three:
1. Your mind isn’t always on your team: Your mind will tell you all sorts of crazy things. As much as they can be believable, they aren’t always true. Be the observer of your thoughts.
2. Let go: Let go of what you might ask? Let go of everything! Stop carrying around your baggage of life. What happened to you, what you did. Let go!
3. There is no pain here: Learn to live in the now. In the now, there’s no suffering.
Like all of these habits, you might say, “Well, easier said than done”. Yes, but that doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t start. Nothing great came easily.
Can you tell us a story about how your entrepreneurial journey started?
My parents would say that I was always entrepreneurial, especially from a young age. Always selling something and always looking to make some money. Throughout my teens and even when I went to study business and entrepreneurship, I knew I was going to be an entrepreneur. It was more a case of when rather than if. There have been businesses — selling cake, clothing, digital marketing services, websites, and drugs, but nothing like this.
Pleaze goes beyond an entrepreneurial endeavour or passion. It’s my life. I came up with this idea through the complete and utter hell that I was living in. I will go to any length to help even that one person suffering. Whether it’s through business or not, it doesn’t matter.
What character traits have you transferred from your addiction to your entrepreneurship. Please share both the positive and negative.
The main one is the obsession, which can be both negative and positive. I have become obsessed with making an impact, making Pleaze a reality, and doing whatever I can to help. There is a downside to that. The obsession creates sacrifice, whether that be not spending time with family, not getting into relationships, or skipping meeting up with friends. I try to keep a balance where I can, but when needed or if I really need I can turn up the obsession, get after it, and get it done.
Character traits that are indispensable in my industry are empathy and understanding. Fortunately, through my experience with mental health and addiction, this is part of my nature.
Why do you think this topic is not discussed enough?
There are many answers to this question. In my experience, it was primarily guilt and shame. I felt embarrassed and afraid of being judged. If an employer knew about my addiction, would that impact my chances of getting or keeping a job? If a partner were aware of my addiction, would that affect my ability to start a relationship? If someone knew about my past, would they be reluctant to be my friend? Unfortunately, the stigma surrounding addiction is very real, whether people want to acknowledge it or not.
The bottom line is that if an employer doesn’t want to hire me, or if someone doesn’t want to be with me because of my past, then they are simply not for me. It’s not my problem, it’s theirs.
Can you share three pieces of advice that you would give to the entrepreneur who is struggling with some sort of addiction but ashamed to speak about it or get help?
- Seek help, NOW: The quicker you get help, the quicker you can get better.
- We don’t have anything if we don’t have sobriety: The first thing we put before our sobriety is the first thing we lose.
- You are only as sick as your secrets: Be free, and the truth does just that.
How can our readers follow you on social media?
Instagram: http://instagram.com/pleazeapp
Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@pleaze.jimmy
LinkedIn: http://linkedin.com/company/pleaze-app
Thank you so much for your insights. That was really inspiring!
