Kyme Dang Of Collective Healing San Diego On How Simplifying & Decluttering Your Life Can Make You Happier
An Interview With Drew Gerber
Say Yes To Yourself: Now that room has been made in the “Let Go”step, allow yourself to think of simple ways for filling up. This is your Fulfillment List.
We live in a time of great excess. We have access to fast fashion, fast food, and fast everything. But studies show that all of our “stuff” is not making us any happier. How can we simplify and focus on what’s important? How can we let go of all the clutter and excess and find true happiness? In this interview series, we are talking to coaches, mental health experts, and authors who share insights, stories, and personal anecdotes about “How Simplifying and Decluttering Your Life Can Make Us Happier.” As a part of this series, I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing Kyme Dang.
Kyme Dang is the founder of Collective Healing San Diego. She is a certified Health, Life, and Spiritual coach who specializes in a method she’s coined as Prophetic Heart Coaching. The method is a Christ-centered combination of clarifying, intuitive, and transformational styles all rolled into one. Unlocked by her own healing journey, she now assists those who want to live fully unlocked, and from their deepest level of personal authority, character, and purpose.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dive in, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share your “backstory” with us? What was it that led you to your eventual career choice?
Thank you for having me! I’ve been a creative entrepreneur for 25 years in the Beauty industry as a hairstylist, 6 years in Hospitality as an Airbnb host, and 6 years in the Music industry as a recording artist.
To be totally transparent, coaching chose me. I often gravitated to leadership and mentorship roles in my respective fields. My life was devastatingly disrupted, and I had to navigate a combination of some of the most painful experiences at the time. It put me on a pathway of core healing for 3 years. When I came up for air, I had bags full of treasure to share. Especially for those who have similar experiences, and still waiting for their breakthroughs.
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?
Being chosen for this feature in Authority Magazine is pretty sweet! The same day I received the news from your Editor-In-Chief Yitzi Weiner, earlier that morning in my prayer time, the word “authority” came to me. Four hours later, I received your email. It was thrilling.
Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that will help people?
Currently, I’m very excited to finish my e-book, and also finishing a project on my property. I hope the e-book will bring language to people who have experienced, or are experiencing, spiritual confusion. They may have a background in church or are having spiritual experiences, and need help making sense of what they’ve gone through or going through.
I’m hoping the property project will be a mini peace retreat location. It’s a safe place intended for the same types of people who want a few days away to concentrate on this inner work.
Can you share with our readers a bit about why you are an authority on the topic of “How Simplifying and Decluttering Your Life Can Make You Happier”?
Clarity, or lack thereof, is a common theme I come across as a Prophetic Heart Coach. Clutter is the opposite of clarity, and comes in many forms: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.
I’ve seen client after client experience the most positive shifts when the “aha’s” click, and their momentum builds into forward motion. When they decide to dig into any of these areas for clutter, while staying accountable to the action steps to simplify their world, it’s a winning combination for their well being.
Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the main focus of our interview. We live in a time of excess. We have access to so much. But studies show that all of our “stuff” is not making us any happier. Can you articulate for our readers a few reasons why all of our possessions are not giving us happiness?
There’s nothing wrong with having stuff, especially when it’s useful or has a vibrant memory attached to it. It’s important to have physical markers to see progress and celebrate past wins.
When our stuff becomes how we measure who we are, or how we meet our needs for love, this is when we’re in the danger zone. We are complex and mysterious beings. How can inanimate and lifeless “stuff” define any of us? This is not to be confused with self expression and preference, but the stuff can only capture us partially, which inevitably leave us wanting.
On a broader societal level, how do you think this excessiveness may be harming our communities and society?
This question reminds me of when I was in a local mall, going down the escalator to the perfume department. I remember thinking to myself, “As beautiful as all of this is, everything will be in a landfill someday, and did it make any difference on a larger scale?.” It’s not a profound observation that excessiveness as a society creates a lot of physical waste. We’ve been conditioned, but contrary to popular belief, I believe excess is the result of a person’s deeper needs, not being met. Excess screams, “ I don’t know what I need, but I’m desperate to find out.”
When you peel back the layers, and start asking questions like, “How much time did it cost me to get these items? Why is it important that I have them? Am I compromising any of my core values in the pursuit of them?” Here, we can start seeing how deep the waste actually is. When we see from a multi-layered perspective like this, keeping in mind how short life can be, is it all worth it?
We are individuals, yes, but individuals make up communities. Healthy communities require us to look out for more than ourselves. So if we’re bogged down in wasteful consumption that’s taking up all of our time and energy, what’s left for purpose? We put it off thinking we have time, until we look up, and wonder where the time went.
The irony of struggling with happiness in modern times is glaring. In many places in the world today, we have more than we ever had before in history. Yet despite this, so many people are unhappy. Why is simplifying a solution? How would simplifying help people to access happiness?
Our brains are the most complex systems of risk and reward. Simplifying gives us clarity and guidelines for what is enough. It’s not about overly restricting ourselves, but simplifying makes room for more thoughtful conversations around contentment. Contentment and satisfaction are ingredients for happiness.
Can you share some insights from your own experience? Where in your life have you transformed yourself from not having enough to finally experiencing enough? For example, many people feel they don’t have enough money. Yet, people define abundance differently, and often, those with the least amount of money can feel the most abundant. Where in your health, wealth, or relationships have you transformed your life?
The way this question is being asked, stimulates my brain to interpret “enough” as having all you need. I didn’t grow up with much, and on top of that, it was a battlefield. I learned to be creative in working with what I had, in order to bring much needed brightness and beauty to my dark world.
This impacted my health and relationships first, when I joined team sports and hip hop dance crews in high school. Athletics and dance not only contributed to my physical well being, they introduced me to some relationships I still have to this day.
I stayed consistent in being creative with what I had, and watched it continue to add up. It hit my wealth in my early 20’s, as I watched what I focused on, worked for, and was curious about, multiply into money and miracles. Eventually, I was able to get my own apartment and car. This continuous seeking and discovering transformed my life from starting at a deficit, being on my own since 17, to having all I needed to thrive.
By grace, at 46 now, I’m sitting on top of several personal and career accomplishments. I’m still curious, still aware of taking care of my health as I age, and I enjoy rich, time tested relationships that have been cultivated over these years. I have tremendous gratitude considering my beginnings.
People, places, and things shape our lives. For example, your friends generate conversations that influence you. Where you live impacts what you eat and how you spend your time. The “things” in your life, like phones, technology, or books impact your recreation. Can you tell us a little about how people, places, and things in your own life impact your experience of “experiencing enough?”
I try to stay very discerning with these types of influences and impacts that surround me. Knowing who I am and what’s in alignment with my values are very important here. In this context, how I’m interpreting “enough” is what resonates with who I am as a person. Whether it be people, places, or things, I get to slow down and asses what wants to earn a place in my life, to allow the exchange in the first place. From here, it’s important to continually observing to see if these exchanges are still growing and evolving with me.
Although growth mindset part of my foundation, there are values I hold that are non-negotiable. It may sound counterintuitive, but in this context, I look for what I’m willing to suffer for. Continuing to learn and know this for myself has given me exponential contentment and satisfaction. This process grows my experience of enough in ways I could never have imagined.
What advice would you give to younger people about “experiencing enough?”
Everyone is in a process, but not everyone’s process is the same. Respect and honor yours.
To differentiate yours from others, faith, patience, and trust will be required, and need revisiting often. Easier said than done, but once these foundations are set, It becomes easier to experience enough, as you are, in every stage of your life.
Healing is very important as well. Life can throw big punches. Taking the time to excavate the pain for hidden treasures, most people are not accustomed to looking for, can feel like going backwards, but it will catapult you into living a life full of meaning.
This is the main question of our interview. Based on your experience and research, can you share your “five ways we can simplify and declutter our lives to make us happier?”
We are multi-layered beings. To simplify and declutter effectively, we need to see in a multi-layered way. With that said, here are the 5 Ways To Simplify and Declutter:
- Step Back: Make the time to take a life inventory. Divide your life into 4 categories: Physical, Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual. Rate them as “full”, “mid-tank” or “empty”, just like your car’s gas gauge letting you know when you need a fill up. This will simplify and bring clarity to your perceptions, allowing you to see where you are.
- Let Go: We hold onto many things, thoughts, and situations that need an upgrade. Now that you can see where you are, make a list of what’s in your control and what isn’t. What give you life and what doesn’t. It’s important to write this down. Allow yourself to let go of the things, thoughts, and situations that are not in your control and does not give you life.
- Say Yes To Yourself: Now that room has been made in the “Let Go”step, allow yourself to think of simple ways for filling up. This is your Fulfillment List.
- Imagine It: Pick one or two things from your Fulfillment List, sit back, close your eyes, and take a couple deep breathes. Imagine yourself at the end of 7 days, accomplishing what you chose. Record all of your senses, what you feel, smell, taste, and touch. Write down every descriptive word that applies.
- Take Action: This is the fun part. Write down some action steps to accomplish within 7 days. You have gained so much information on where you are, and what you really need. These action steps are a promise to yourself. As much as we need to maintain integrity with others to bring happiness about in our relationships, our happiness is connected to having and keeping integrity with ourselves.
You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. :-)
I truly believe the bigger picture of the Prophetic Heart Coaching I do, e-book, and peace retreat that’s currently being worked on, has made, and will continue to make a substantial impact. Building off this momentum, I hope Collective Healing San Diego (CHSD) becomes the formidable resource of alternative wellness for my city and beyond. To be the umbrella for other practitioners of like mindedness, in their respective modalities, is the goal.
I think it important to start where you are, and although alternative wellness is not widely recognized as a first option because insurance does not yet cover what we do, I know people within the industry who are working to change this. I hope CHSD will be ready to fill that gap once it does. Until then, my litmus test for impact is to take care of the one right in front of me, and stay available wherever I am. When we truly believe we possess great influence, we allow it to be battle tested, and it’s a matter of trusting that it will all add up. Our only job is to consistently show up.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Why not have an experience for yourselves? For a limited time, I’m offering a free, first time session called The Art Of Heart Mapping with every email subscription. Sign up at www.collectivehealingsd.com
You can find me on Instagram and Facebook @collectivehealingsd
Thank you so much for these insights. This was so inspiring, and so important!
About The Interviewer: For 30 years, Drew Gerber has been inspiring those who want to change the world. Drew is the CEO of Wasabi Publicity, Inc., a full-service PR agency lauded by PR Week and Good Morning America. Wasabi Publicity, Inc. is a global marketing company that supports industry leaders, change agents, unconventional thinkers, companies and organizations that strive to make a difference. Whether it’s branding, traditional PR or social media marketing, every campaign is instilled with passion, creativity and brilliance to powerfully tell their clients’ story and amplify their intentions in the world.