Lessons from a Thriving Power Couple, With Rachel Marie Martin and Dan Morris of FindingJoy.net

An Interview With Nancy Landrum

Team Spirit — I can’t say I understand how we started this way, but we want each other to win. We’ve never had a moment of jealousy or dismay that one project is getting bigger than the other. We want them all to grow and prosper. Every step up is a step forward. Cheers for each other.

As a part of our series about lessons from Thriving Power Couples, I had the pleasure of interviewing Rachel Marie Martin.

Rachel Marie Martin, a seasoned author and mompreneur of eleven, champions the indomitable spirit of humanity, believing firmly in its capacity not only to persevere but to flourish and discover profound joy. Through her various platforms, she pours her heart out to empower others on their journey.

As the creative force behind FindingJoy.net, Rachel is known for her insightful writing, touching the lives of millions. She is the acclaimed author of three books: Mom Enough, The Brave Art of Motherhood, and soon to be released Get Your Spark Back: How to Find Happiness and Reignite your Life.

Additionally, she serves as a founding partner of Audience Industries, a dynamic company dedicated to mentoring and equipping entrepreneurs for success.

Rachel’s influence transcends borders, with her articles translated into over 25 languages and her site attracting millions of visitors each month. Her vibrant and viral Facebook community is a testament to her ability to engage and inspire.

Her work has been featured in a plethora of prestigious outlets, including The Huffington Post, The Today Show, and Star Tribune, to name a few. Rachel is a sought-after speaker, spreading her message of purpose and determination to audiences worldwide, encouraging both mothers and entrepreneurs to embrace each day with intentionality.

Amidst her professional endeavors, Rachel remains deeply rooted in her role as a mother to 11. Nashville, Tennessee, is where she calls home, a place where her passion for family, entrepreneurship, and purpose converges harmoniously.

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Can you tell us a story about what brought you two to your respective career paths?

It was actually the first home computers of the 80s that connected Rachel and Dan. Rachel’s dad had an early interest in computers, buying the family a TI-99 in Minnesota, and Dan’s mother was an early programmer who bought a Commodore 64 for the family while living in Alaska. The two found computers to be at the center of their worlds as they grew up, culminating in Rachel becoming one of the original bloggers online. Dan, on the other hand, was working for an infomercial company as the web guy driving internet sales.

In 2012, Dan took the expertise he had learned driving web traffic to a blogging conference to teach bloggers how to drive traffic to their own sites. Rachel, looking to network and find sponsorship opportunities, attended the same conference, sitting in on his session.

Afterwards, Dan went through the business cards he’d collected to write thank you notes and came across Rachel’s card. Checking out Rachel’s blog, he quickly penned an email that said, “It was great meeting you this weekend. Looking at your site, I’m afraid I didn’t give you the respect you truly deserved at the conference. Of all the bloggers I met, I didn’t meet anyone who has grown the amazing business you have. I look forward to chatting.”

What inspired you to work together?

Working together wasn’t something we were inspired to do, per se. After meeting at that blogging conference, we decided to create a mastermind group together with a couple of other entrepreneurs. I was working on building a nationwide tour of workshops where I planned to teach “bloggers, podcasters, and YouTubers” how to turn their craft into a career. Rachel was working on turning her fame into a book deal. Well, out of pure coincidence, my first workshop and the publisher who was courting her were both in Denver.

So, we decided that we could both be of help to each other in our respective meetings, but what I didn’t realize was that Rachel’s help was invaluable to the workshop tour. She did 100 things I never would have even considered.

To give you an example, while I was speaking, she was doing social media for the live event as well as promoting the next events. She handled attendee questions, got the catered lunch ready, noticed changes that should be made to the curriculum, and was on stage when her expertise would make for a better experience.

In her meeting with book publishers, I was helpful in asking the right questions, negotiating deal points, and reading all the legal language. I wish I could use what I know to help every author with that. We never worked apart after that.

Can you share the most interesting story that occurred since you two got married?

We met a wonderful woman in New Zealand who runs Faster Masters Rowing and teaches rowing technique worldwide. When she heard what we did, she invited us to come teach digital marketing there in New Zealand and helped us put together a tour of seven cities doing workshops in each one.

One of our stops was Cathedral Cove, which was used in the filming of the Narnia movies. It’s a beautiful place where the cliffs meet the ocean. At one point, there is a tunnel through a rocky slope from one beach to another that just explodes with beauty when you reach the other side.

Several months after we returned from the trip, Rachel was going through some boxes of her old stuff. At the bottom of a box, covered in dust, was an old forgotten vision board she’d created. On it, at #2, was Cathedral Cove.

How do you divide the responsibilities in your company? Can you give examples?

The Amazing Race is a show we watch together. We often think we should do the Amazing Race together. Watching the show, when the contestants reach a challenge, we talk about who would do what in a particular challenge. Rachel is more of an adrenaline junkie and would likely do better at things that involve heights.

I’d probably do better at the dance numbers and perhaps those that involve linguistics.

It’s no different in the company. For the quarter of the company that is the FindingJoy blog and Rachel’s books, she’s the face and the voice. She does the writing and largely the engagement with the audience. I’m the back end, helping secure book deals, line up speaking engagements, manage the website, and put together sales strategies.

For the BC Stack and Tracing the Path Podcast, Dan’s the face and the voice. He cold calls contributors, puts together the deals, does the research, writes the stories, and runs the sale. Rachel, who really loves data and analytics, handles the money, the stats, conversion rates, and manages the affiliate payments.

We both have that desire to have our voices heard and to be on stage, so our split allows each of us to enjoy the spotlight with the other person supporting.

Are you working on any exciting new projects now?

We are currently working on launching Rachel’s third book titled, “Get Your Spark Back: How to Find Happiness and Reignite Your Life.”

The book includes features from people who are doing amazing things. One of those people is Rebecca Lines. At 40, she Googled “Acting Nashville” and took classes at one of the locations listed. It wasn’t but a few years before you could see her in Marvel movies and in Cobra Kai.

Cirie Fields, at age 36, decided to get off the couch and try out for Survivor. She’s been on it four seasons now.

After pulling herself out of a bad situation, Rachel too got her spark back through writing and built herself an amazing career. She decided to take the lessons from those stories to teach women in midlife how to get their spark back and build an amazing life.

Rachel is busy completing final edits to her book while I pitch podcasts and manage PR teams to get ready for a NY Times Best Selling launch on August 27.

What are the “5 Things You Do To Thrive As A Couple”? Please share a story or example for each.

1. Team Spirit — I can’t say I understand how we started this way, but we want each other to win. We’ve never had a moment of jealousy or dismay that one project is getting bigger than the other. We want them all to grow and prosper. Every step up is a step forward. Cheers for each other.

2. Private time — Rachel wakes early and works or runs or meditates. The first couple of hours in the morning, before the kids wake, are truly hers. I stay up late working on my podcast, a project, or watching a show. When parents live and work together, there’s nothing wrong with a little “me” time.

3. Decision Freedom — Just because we’re married doesn’t mean we have to agree on everything. My wife might like a particular painting and want it in the living room. I may want to cut a giant hole in the garage ceiling and paint the rafters. We give each other some freedom to do things here and there that we just want to do. (However, most of the time we like doing things together and making decisions together.)

4. Disc Golf— There’s a course relatively close to the house where we can be outside and have fun. While we’re both competitive, for some reason we aren’t while playing disc golf. We’re just excited when either one of us has a great shot.

5. Concert Dates — In 2021, we decided that it was silly to live in Nashville and not go to live events. So, we have done a really good job making sure that we go to one concert or other live event each month. There are so many to choose from here, it’s never a problem finding something.

Is there any particular book or concept that helped you overcome a turning point in your marriage?

I’d love to say there was a book, or a therapy series or TedTalk that helped our marriage, but it was a Facebook exclusive talk show called Red Table Talk with Jada Pinkett Smith.

Jada spoke in one episode about an epiphany she’d had in her marriage to Will Smith. They had spent a good period of their marriage trying to make each other happy, solving each other’s problems.

But the conclusion they came to was marriage isn’t about solving each other’s problems but rather walking hand in hand through the good and bad times together. Sometimes you help each other. Sometimes you’re there in support to cheer each other on in solving their own issues and going through their own tunnels. We’re doing life together! Happiness isn’t something you rely on each other for, it’s what each brings to the table.

When you work, live, and breathe together, without the boundaries employed couples enjoy, it’s important to remember.

Have there been any disasters caused by miscommunication? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?

It was the night before the sale of BC Stack was set to open. Rachel and I had spent the last week taking turns opening the website, making tweaks, saving it, and closing it so the other person could take a turn.

But on that night, one of us didn’t press save and the other person started working. Then the first person began working on the document again, finally pressing save, overwriting what the other person did, leaving the page quite a mess.

So, overnight we rebuilt the entire page. Our BC Stack sale is a six-figure endeavor that can’t tolerate any missteps. Almost starting from scratch, we built the page better and got done within minutes of the launch start.

What advice would you give to other couples who work together?

Rachel says the hardest part about working together is not being able to come home and complain about your co-worker. This is a real issue working together as we all experience frustration and “arghhhh” moments.

The key to working together is to not take those personally but to listen, acknowledge, and love each other.

None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person or couple you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

Dan Miller is the NY Times Best Selling Author of 48 Days to the Work You Love. One day we had a chance to sit down with him and tell him about our book publishing plans. In that one conversation, he opened our eyes to a myriad of questions we’d never considered. He let us know the secrets of what make book-based businesses profitable and questions to ask when securing publishing deals. We will never forget his advice.

Sadly, he passed away earlier this year from cancer.

Pat Hazell is one of the original writers of Seinfeld and has an amazing stage act as well as a successful business. He’s been able to introduce us to a myriad of people we’d never have had a chance to interact with. He’s our biggest daily cheerleader (other than our parents). I don’t think he’ll ever know how motivating it is to have a big thinker as a cheerleader.

In fact, it should be noted that for Rachel’s giant digital book launch event last year, because of Pat, we had the one and only Marja Harmon from Hamilton sing two songs for Rachel’s audience. I can’t tell you how blessed we were to give the art of this beautiful woman to our audience.

And finally, our parents. Together we run a blended family of 11 kids and a dog. For us to travel to speaking engagements, book signings, run workshops, meet up with joint venture partners, and even take simple meetings, we’d never leave the house if it weren’t for them. They are the true wind beneath our wings.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quotes”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your lives?

The quotes people pull from Rachel’s writing have been shared over 40M times. Many would include them in their answer to this question. But for us, there are two that stand out.

The first is a Japanese proverb that, when translated, means “Fall Seven Times, Stand Up Eight.” Rachel’s had it hanging in her home for years. While it means keep going and don’t give up, it has three distinct parts. The first is in life, you’re going to fall and make mistakes many times, that’s part of life. The second part is that you’re going to have the ability to get back up. And finally, it doesn’t say fall seven times, stand up seven times. . . it assumes that you’ll keep getting up and going forward.

The second quote is largely attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt, although it is not exactly what she wrote in her book. It’s more of the shorthand version. On the surface, it means pushing your boundaries and doing hard things. Rachel truly leaned on the quote when she was pulling herself and her seven kids out of a life situation.

But business-wise it takes on a different meaning. As entrepreneurs, it is very easy to stick to the tasks you already know how to do. For instance, instead of learning a new platform like TikTok or YouTube, a Facebook veteran might decide to try paid ads on Facebook because the learning curve is shorter.

But sticking to the easier path will only take you so far. The skills required to become a millionaire are not the same skills that are needed to become a “thousandaire.” You must do the things you’re afraid to do to become the person you want to be.

How have you used your success to bring goodness to the world?

The world is a big place. Bringing goodness to the world is largely reserved for the organizations that have earned it on their way up. The Red Cross, UNICEF, and Doctors Without Borders have done amazing things to get where they are today.

We’ve decided to put all our good works into those we have the most influence on: our children and our audience.

Being a digital entrepreneur means we don’t miss anything the kids do. We go to every soccer game, dance recital, and Youth in Government speech. We were able to homeschool during the first two Covid years and one by one we’re moving the brood of 11 from childhood to college, to entrepreneurship, and to the military.

It’s that ability to be there with our kids that moved us to create grants for our audience. We want others in our audience, who are passionate about working online, to succeed. So, every year we ask the audience to tell us what they could accomplish if they had an extra $1000.

Could they finish that book they’ve been wanting to sell?
Could they hire a virtual assistant and get their backlog of tasks done?
Could they have a new website built?
Then we choose one and do our best to help them get where they need to go.

You are people of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. :-)

Our son, Sam, has celiac disease. His body can’t digest the gluten protein, but instead attacks it. The result of that attack is that the body loses the ability to digest food.

So, he can’t eat it.

Over 2 million people have celiac. Many are families who don’t have the financial resources to buy gluten-free food.

We would love to inspire the world to look for their local celiac charities that raise money to help financially strapped celiacs get the food they need for their regular diet. Helping 2 million people would be pretty amazing.

We are very blessed that some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US, with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them :-)

Jesse Itzler and Sara Blakely are the real deal power couple for sure. While some people are famous for being famous, Itzler and Blakely are famous for doing amazing things. At the age of 29, Sara founded the American underwear company Spanx.

Millions of people have great ideas, but only a few of them act on those ideas. And fewer yet are people who turn those ideas into international brands. Spanx made $4M in its first year and $10M in its second.

Jesse took exactly the same path. The path of ‘getting things done.’

While starting as a musician with a recording contract, he quickly used his entrepreneurial chops to turn his passion into a business. Then, in the dream of every entrepreneur, he flipped that company for a profit. Then he started Marquis Jet and flipped that company to my former boss, Warren Buffet, for another profit.

He’s written a NY Times Best Selling book and now co-owns a sports franchise with Sara as well as The 100 Mile Group, a company that invests in other people’s ideas.

Jesse and Sara are The Power Couple.

How can our readers follow your work online?

We are largely in three places:
FindingJoy.net (or https://facebook.com/findingjoyblog)
AudienceIndustries.com
Tracing The Path Podcast (wherever you listen to podcasts)

Thank you so much for joining us. This was very inspirational.

About the Interviewer: Nancy Landrum, MA, Relationship Coach, has authored eight books, including “How to Stay Married and Love it” and “Stepping Twogether: Building a Strong Stepfamily”. Nancy has been coaching couples and stepfamilies with transformative communication skills for over thirty years. Nancy is an engaging interviewer and powerful speaker. Nancy has contributed to The Washington Post, Huffington Post, Authority, Medium, Yahoo, MSN, Psych Central, Thrive, Woman’s Day magazine, and more. Nancy is the Founder of the only one of its kind online relationship solution, www.MillionaireMarriageClub.com. Nancy coaches couples across the globe in person and via Zoom. Nancy’s passion is to guide couples and families to happy lasting marriages where children thrive and lovers love for life.