Lessons from a Thriving Power Couple, With Rebecca and Chris van Bergen
An Interview With Nancy Landrum
We thrive while being busy, but are committed to rest. Our work is all consuming and with two kids and outside commitments from writing to volunteering, we find our days full. But, we never allow ourselves to overwork– we feel equally committed to quiet weekends, personal travel for rest and rejuvenation and believe fiercely in balance.
As a part of our series about lessons from Thriving Power Couples, I had the pleasure of interviewing Rebecca and Chris van Bergen.
Rebecca founded Nest in 2006 — the year she graduated from Washington University with her Master’s Degree in Social Work and the same year Mohammed Yunus won the Nobel Peace Prize for his work in microfinance. Inspired by his work and her own travels abroad, Rebecca launched Nest from her apartment in St. Louis, Missouri at the age of 24. Eighteen years later, Rebecca leads an organization that supports the global creative economy, assisting roughly 250,000 artisans in 124 countries and partnering with major brands such as Etsy, Madewell, Chloe, Hermes, West Elm and Patagonia. Recognized as a World Economic Forum Young Global Leader and recipient of numerous prestigious awards such as the Elevate Prize, Rebecca’s leadership has garnered international recognition and media attention, revolutionizing the fashion and home décor industries by making craft work a viable, profitable and ethical option.
Chris joined the Nest team in 2011 and is Nest’s Chief Financial and Operations Officer, where he oversees both the financial and programming operations of the organization, focusing on professional training, mentorship and strategic initiatives for more than 2000 businesses worldwide. He has guided the organization through years of exponential growth and impact and led the development of Nest’s ethical compliance program, the first set of ethical compliance regulatory standards for homes and small workshops. This innovative tool offered the fashion and home décor industry a standardized approach to audit supply chains and ensure ethical sourcing for the world’s estimated 300 million home‐based workers. In addition, Chris is an Adjunct Professor at the Leonard N. Stern School of Business at NYU, where he also received an MBA, as well as a lecturer and consultant around the country. Chris is the author of Certifiable: How Businesses Operationalize Responsible Sourcing, an exploration of the real-world implementation of supply chain transparency and corporate social responsibility.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Can you tell us a story about what brought you two to your respective career paths?
I (Rebecca) founded the organization when I was 24 just out of graduate school. The year that I graduated, 2006, Muhammad Yunus won the Nobel Peace Prize and enthusiasm for microfinance exploded. New organizations and corporations emerged to put Yunus’ principles into practice, scaling applications of microfinance and not necessarily with a strong foundation of research guiding their actions. Keep in mind that these were the early days of “not-only-for profit” business and many of the firms emerging, while driven by a social mission, were also focused on protecting their bottom lines first and foremost. As a young student, just graduating with my Master’s Degree in Social Work, I understood effective social programs as being less about public policy and more about direct practice with people — so this rapid scaling of lending took me aback. In our country, loans make debt, not a business in and of themselves, and so the conflation of these two concepts was worrying to me — though it turns out, in the most productive sense. It was my interest in generating economic opportunities in developing economies without the burden of debt that drove me to found Nest. My vision was for a sustainable model — one not just about lending, but also about more holistic business development. Instead of teaching a man to fish as the old adage goes, I wanted to not just finance a woman’s purchase of a sewing machine, I wanted to ensure she had the skills to improve her sewing and grow a business. After 18 years of operation we now provide impactful programming to 2,390 artisan businesses in 125 countries. Those micro and small businesses are bringing income to 245,000 people and their over 1.4 million family members. We have active partnerships with over 50 national and international brands and companies, and have expanded our US-based programs to support makers in every single US state.
My route to Nest was perhaps even more circuitous than Rebecca’s. I started my career as a professional musician. Trumpet was my instrument and orchestral music was my passion. I was drawn to the trumpet from an early age and grew to love the magical joy of performing with an orchestra. It was, for me, a transcendent experience, both listening to, and being a part of, an ensemble of disparate sounds coming together into one overarching voice, transporting the audience and uplifting spirits. I pursued my craft by attending a music conservatory, while simultaneously pursuing a degree in Psychology, as I couldn’t quite give up academic pursuits solely for music. At graduation, I took on the role as a freelance musician. I had the great pleasure of performing with some of the most notable ensembles in the country, to full houses of appreciative audiences. However, there was another calling, something buried that began to rise to the surface. I distinctly remember a profound moment that sealed my shift away from music: I had just finished performing Tchaikovsky’s 4th Symphony with the Philadelphia Orchestra. The full house of 3,000 leapt to their feet with thunderous applause, a validation that all musicians dream about. But, even as I was pleased, I felt an indescribable emptiness. I remember thinking to myself, if I could not find immeasurable joy in this moment, how could I continue performing as my career? I found myself starting to seek opportunities that had a more substantial impact, ones that improved people’s lives in measurable ways. Then I met Rebecca. Nest was already impactful, but poised to grow in ways neither she nor I could see at the time. I went back to school for my MBA, mastering skills that I have used both for Nest and in the mission of Nest. My work at Nest, interest in the intersection of business and impact, and my MBA have also led to my teaching of corporate responsibility and ethics to business school students and to writing my book, Certifiable: How Businesses Operationalize Responsible Sourcing, which is used at business schools across the country.
Can you share the most interesting story that occurred since you two got married?
The most inspiring story for us is the growth of Nest. Chris joined Nest five years after I started it. At the time, we were a staff of only three people and, though our mission was unique and impactful, finding our footing in the massive international nonprofit sector was challenging. Since those early days, we have grown tremendously: now, we employ over 30 people, work in 124 countries and with makers in every U.S. state. We have partnerships with some of the most well-known global brands and retailers including Target, Pottery Barn, Tory Burch, Patagonia and Hermes and an Advisory Board of industry leaders, including designer Donna Karan and model Amber Valetta. They lend their experience, expertise and recognition to ensure Nest is at the forefront of a global movement for positive change. We see our mission, impact, innovation and collaboration continuing to grow.
For us, though, an inspiring personal story is our collaboration with the famous cellist, Yo-Yo Ma. In 2018, Yo-Yo Ma began a two-year journey to perform Johann Sebastian Bach’s six suites for solo cello in one sitting at 36 locations on six continents. He is supporter of our mission, and to celebrate craftsmanship’s essential role in our communities and our society, he partnered with Nest to identify local illustrators and graphic artists in each Bach Project location to produce hand-drawn posters, local visual explorations of how craft and music can combine to enrich audiences and local artisans worldwide. Personal to us, this partnership brought together my passion for craft with Chris’ original and ongoing passion for classical music in a way that highlighted the centrality of art — in all its forms — in our lives.
What inspired you to work together?
Rebecca: I met Chris through a mutual friend when he was living and working in Philadelphia. I was living in New York City, but both traveled around the country to raise money for Nest, as well as abroad to identify and work closely with artisans who could benefit from Nest’s support. Adding in commutes to Philadelphia to see Chris became difficult and unworkable. As Chris said, by this time, he was exploring other career options, including orchestral management, as he was stepping away from musical performances. His love of music extended to his love of the arts in general, though, and he was first interested in, then became passionate about, Nest’s intersection with the arts and with business, as well as our support of the creative economy. He was attracted to the entrepreneurial spirit and mission-driven vitality of Nest, unlike orchestras where he had previously worked, that were more traditional and conventional. We both saw the value and expertise he could bring to Nest, so, with some soul-searching and trepidation about leaving the music world, he joined me at Nest. It has been fifteen years and we have never looked back!
Have there been any disasters caused by miscommunication? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?
Rebecca: Our kids once told us that the only time they hear us fight, it is about Nest — a really eye-opening revelation for us! It took us by surprise at first, but we paid attention to our conversations and disagreements and realized it was true! For some reason our differences manifest clearly at work in ways they do not manifest (or matter?!) at home. Chris brings a very operational and risk-adverse perspective to our work — which makes sense as Nest’s CFOO. I am more entrepreneurial and fiery — I tend to make decisions quickly and confidently. Together these can create a perfect yin and yang, but in the heat of the moment, they can be a bit more like oil and water. We have learned that we need to be very deliberate about when and how we discuss work issues — we often do it outside, taking a walk where we can breathe in fresh air and stay more centered. This also keeps the conversation out of our home, maintaining that sacred space and, of course, out of the ear shot of our two kids!
How do you divide the responsibilities in your company? Can you give examples?
Rebecca: Chris and I are very different personalities so the division of labor of leading Nest came pretty naturally. I am a visionary, think creatively and quickly, often dreaming big. Chris has a business mindset, thinking about the practicality of each program or idea. When harnessed together, we are able to build both highly impactful and responsive programs, but ones that can be successfully implemented in a fiscally responsible way. For the most part, I am the public face of Nest with a focus on vision setting and external relationships, whereas Chris maintains control over our internal operations.
What are the “5 Things You Do To Thrive As A Couple”? Please share a story or example for each.
1. We compensate for one another. Because we are married and live together, we know intimately what the other is going through; if one of us is sick, did not sleep well or is feeling anxious, the other partner can lend support, lean in, shift priorities or take on responsibilities. As an example, after I gave birth, I went through a period of time where I felt unable to travel and leave our children. During that time, Chris agreed to do all the traveling, so I could stay home and work from there.
2. We vision for Nest and ourselves:. As co-leaders of a nonprofit, we spend a lot of time discussing our visions and plans for Nest, what additional impact we can have and how to move forward. However, we have learned that we also need to prioritize our own goals, aspirations and dreams. For example, Chris has written and published a book and he teaches at a business school part-time. I like to write articles, do media interviews, speak publicly and am involved politically.
3. We are fiercely committed to our community. I grew up in St. Louis and Chris lived here for a time, so we are firmly rooted in our city, our neighborhood and our social circle. We make time to support, enjoy and take advantage of the many things St. Louis has to offer.
4. Our family is our number one priority. Like all parents, we thrive when our kids thrive. They come first in our lives and their happiness, fulfillment, success and well-being is the most important thing to us. In addition, though, I still have a 95-year-old grandmother living alone in St. Louis that I am close to and my parents live nearby also. Nest is our passion; family is our soul.
5. We thrive while being busy, but are committed to rest. Our work is all consuming and with two kids and outside commitments from writing to volunteering, we find our days full. But, we never allow ourselves to overwork– we feel equally committed to quiet weekends, personal travel for rest and rejuvenation and believe fiercely in balance.
Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you share the responsibilities?
Chris: We are both excited to continue the growth of Nest, reaching and assisting more artisans here and around the world. As mentioned previously, I recently published my first book — Certifiable: How Businesses Operationalize Responsible Sourcing. It is the first comprehensive analysis of responsible sourcing and supply chain certifications and, in it, I offer a roadmap to create, implement, and audit transformative and socially-responsible sourcing practices. It grew out of my teaching at New York University’s Stern School of Business, educating students on responsible and ethical business practices. Rebecca was thrilled to write the introduction, tying my research and recommendations back to our work at Nest and, of course, to work together on another project.
What advice would you give to other couples who work together?
Rebecca: It can be hard. Even pre-Covid, when we would commute daily to an office, the growth in technology, allowing both employers and employees to be on the job 24/7, boundary-setting is a challenge in both relationships and work places. Our situation is unique, of course, because our home life and work life are inextricably intertwined. However, we have learned to both lean into, and enjoy, our merger of life and livelihood. We look to our sector — craft-making — for inspiration. Artisan work is deeply connected to a person, their family and their community. Skills are passed down from generation to the next and families often work together, making it an intergenerational exercise. Nest, too, for us, is a family endeavor. We love bringing our kids to family-friendly meetings, sharing our projects with them and using our work as a way to ensure that we, as a family, are committed to hands-on change, activism and working hard for what we believe in.
None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person or couple who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?
Rebecca: Right after Chris joined Nest, we traveled together to Kenya to begin a new project. We visited a husband and wife who were running an artisan jewelry business out of their home. The community-minded couple, Anton and Benta, had adopted several orphan children whose parents died prematurely from HIV/AIDS. That brought the number of their children to ten. This meant Anton and Benta were operating a large jewelry-making business, along with the necessary machinery and equipment for brass casting and polishing, inside a very crowded home. Not only did this present a health and safety issue, since children were playing near dangerous machinery, it also created a challenging environment for the production of high-quality jewelry. With the help of Nest and a visionary fashion brand startup, Anton and Benta built a small workshop adjacent to their home where they could safely fabricate the fine jewelry they were known for. Nest also helped them upgrade their tools and equipment, allowing them to grow the business. Anton likened Nest to a place where all artisans, like birds, can come — to be nourished, to be safe and to grow. They have since shared that with Nest’s help, their business has seen remarkable success. To be a couple, helping other couples achieve their dreams: it does not get any better than that.
Anton was not wrong — the concept behind what we do is, in many ways, not just named for, but modeled after, the nurturing behavior of birds. We just happen to build our nests to incubate hatchling businesses — not plumed and winged vertebrates. And we do this in a culturally sensitive way, as a means to incubate and cultivate broad-based social and economic change. While I founded Nest before I married and had children, it is not lost on us that the name Nest is a synonym for home. Nest, the organization, has become a second home for us, for our staff and for our artisans around the world. Running it as a family business, from our own home, is a perfect fit for our mission and vision.
Is there any particular book or concept that helped you overcome a turning point in your marriage?
Rebecca: I am a trained social worker and Chris has degrees in music, psychology and business. So, we have both been trained in, and believe in, the concept of active listening. We think of active listening as being very attentive to, and engaged in, whatever conversation we are a part of — whether it is with our kids, our employees or our friends and family. We have learned how important it is to hear and understand other peoples’ perspectives, reflecting back what we hear, not just so our plan, behavior or assessment can be adjusted or corrected, but to ensure we have the trust of those we interact with. We have found this to be important in life and in business.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quotes”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your lives?
Our 11-year-old daughter loves this quote from Oprah Winfrey: “You can have it all, you just can’t have it all at once.” We have incorporated this advice both as a working couple and as a family. We are often busy with work at the same time and quite frequently, we need to travel at the same time as well. Over time, we have had to learn to be comfortable with letting go of certain business opportunities because we cannot make it work with our family schedule and, conversely, to be alright with the times when we may miss a milestone moment in our children’s lives because of our work. We talk with each other and our kids about how important it is to remember that life is long and that our goal is to create a balance over time, not necessarily on any given day or week.
How have you used your success to bring goodness to the world?
We feel lucky that by running a nonprofit, our daily lives are focused on bringing goodness. Speaking at the United Nations headquarters in New York, the Secretary-General warned that “the era of global warming has ended” and “the era of global boiling has arrived.” He was speaking specifically of climate change and its impacts, but we believe there is a deeper meaning in his words. Within our organization and among our different stakeholders — especially our artisan and maker partners — this feeling of “boiling” is very real. We are living in an era not just of change, but of chaos. There is political upheaval in nearly every country, a global rise in extremism, worldwide economic turmoil, where even small gains feel fragile, war on two continents and, yes, climate change, a future for which we are woefully unprepared and one that is arriving at frightening pace. Given this, our work at Nest feels more important than ever. We are deeply committed, not just to the grassroots change our nonprofit can provide, but also to the systemic and industry-wide change we need. Alongside our brand and retail partners, we can be leaders in the reimagining and restructuring of business as a force for positive change — for both people and the planet.
You are people of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. :-)
Climate journalist Mary Heglar recently wrote: “For too long, the climate fight has been limited to scientists and policy experts. While we need their skills, we also need so much more. When I survey the field, it’s clear that what we desperately need is more artists.” At Nest, we have been thinking intensely about the role that craft and the creative economy will play in our future. Through our work, we see how artists view the world differently and how they and their work can inform, inspire, influence and initiate larger societal changes. Artists have the unique ability to reconstruct and reorder objects, environments and the public’s sensibility into beauty, connectedness and hope. Artists can tell stories and bring meaning, they can think creatively about solutions, bring unique perspectives to complex challenges and inspire a new generation. We would love to inspire a movement where artists are leading global change — to build a new world focused on creativity, connection and humanity.
We are very blessed that some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them :-)
Esther Duflo and Abhijit Banerjee. They are an incredible couple — just the sixth couple to win a Nobel Prize together. Esther and Abhijit are both economists at Massachusetts Institute of Technology. She describes their work by saying they seek to understand the economic lives of the poor, with the goal of helping to design and evaluate more effective and inclusive social policies. Together, they wrote Poor Economics: A Radical Rethinking of the Way to Fight Global Poverty. Both of us love their book, their work and the way they leverage reliable data and empirical thinking to not just write and research, but to build actionable and practical solutions to highly complex problems. That they work together, write together and love together is an inspiration for us both.
How can our readers follow your work online?
Readers can follow us at buildanest.org and on instagram @buildanest.
Thank you so much for joining us. This was very inspirational.
About the Interviewer: Nancy Landrum, MA, Relationship Coach, has authored eight books, including “How to Stay Married and Love it” and “Stepping Twogether: Building a Strong Stepfamily”. Nancy has been coaching couples and stepfamilies with transformative communication skills for over thirty years. Nancy is an engaging interviewer and powerful speaker. Nancy has contributed to The Washington Post, Huffington Post, Authority, Medium, Yahoo, MSN, Psych Central, Thrive, Woman’s Day magazine, and more. Nancy is the Founder of the only one of its kind online relationship solution, www.MillionaireMarriageClub.com. Nancy coaches couples across the globe in person and via Zoom. Nancy’s passion is to guide couples and families to happy lasting marriages where children thrive and lovers love for life.
