Mental Health Champions: Why & How Kristin Light of K•Light Digital Charisma Is Helping To Champion Mental Wellness
An Interview With Michelle Tennant Nicholson
Snack. Walk. Nap. In that order. If I feel a spiral coming on, I get a snack. If it was just a blood sugar dip, I’ll feel better. Still spiraling? I’ll take a walk outside (sometimes my partner Alex has to drag me off the couch). Still spiraling? Hey, it happens. At this point, I take myself to bed. 99% of the time, I’ll wake up feeling less crummy. Still crummy? See tip #1 and get texting.
As a part of our series about Mental Health Champions helping to promote mental wellness, I had the pleasure to interview Kristin Light.
As a vivacious showgirl and successful entrepreneur, Kristin Light was perhaps the last person you’d expect to be suffering from a diagnosed mental illness. Creative marketing strategist, vintage dance specialist, and award-winning speaker, her multi-decade eclectic career spans both the boardroom and the ballroom. Following a brush with suicide that left her confined to a psychiatric ward, Kristin now speaks out to provide real insight and practical strategies that demystify the facts surrounding mood disorders and mental illness using inspirational (and often hilarious) stories from her own personal and professional life.
Read more at: kristinlight.ca
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dig in, our readers would like to get to know you a bit. Can you tell us a bit about how you grew up?
Hi! I grew up blissfully ignorant in this small northern Ontario town that snowed 10 months out of the year. I was chubby and odd but had no idea until puberty beaned me in the face with a reality snowball. My ‘thing’ was dance. I studied ballet, modern jazz, and tap from the age of 4 onwards. I wasn’t particularly good at it initially… my ‘vibe’ didn’t really jive with the contemporary styles of the 80’s/90’s. But there wasn’t really anything else I felt like pursuing, so my mom just kept signing me up year after year. My family moved just outside of Toronto when I turned 10. That was a major culture shock that is still a frequent guest star on my rumination Greatest Hits. I didn’t fit in; I had a hard time making friends (yet no trouble securing enemies) and developed a keen sense of suspicion as a result. Cue the bullying, the eating disorder, and the doomed attempt at people-pleasing that carried throughout my formative years. I kept dancing though, eventually training 5–6 days a week, many hours at a time. That grew into 20+ years of scattered professional work as a dancer, instructor, and choreographer; smiling-through-suspicion throughout.
You are currently leading an initiative that is helping to promote mental wellness. Can you tell us a bit more specifically about what you are trying to address?
My particular little corner of the equity and inclusion landscape addresses invisible disabilities of the mind (specifically mental illness and neurodiversity) and the associated stigma and misinformation that continues to plague those of us afflicted. I share my story and educate business communities to help address the inadvertent gap in workplace accommodation afforded to these individuals, especially when compared to the accommodations made towards physical illness or mobility.
Can you tell us the backstory about what inspired you to originally feel passionate about this cause?
I was first diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder around 15 years ago. The symptoms started years earlier, but as these things were kept much more behind the curtain in those days, I didn’t know what was happening with me. I believed the criticisms… every single one. “Difficult.” “Bitchy.” “Unsupportive.” “Elitist.” “Selfish.” “Insubordinate.” In hindsight, I now recognize the early signs of mental turmoil; but at the time, they were viewed as character flaws. I did everything in my power to keep my suffering under wraps. No one likes a sad girl, right? I wove an intricate tapestry of lies to cover up for my frequent days in morbid hiding. I refused to leave the apartment with anything less than a Grace Kelly-inspired curl set and corresponding retro eyeliner. I was “on” from the second I stepped outside, until that long-awaited ‘click’ of the deadbolt the following night. To say it was exhausting is a colossal understatement. But I didn’t dare face the world any other way; I convinced myself it was necessary for business. By my late 30s, I was a secretly suicidal showgirl; co-owner of both two successful event venues and a long-running swing dance studio while performing regularly in a fringed flapper dress at fancy events. My life looked like something out of an F. Scott Fitzgerald novel… but like the great Gatsby himself, I was really struggling.
Somewhere along the line, I made the decision to end my life on my 40th birthday. Luckily, my plan was thwarted by an astute psychiatrist and eight-weeks spent under direct supervision in an inpatient psych hospital. My wrists still bear the physical scars of my many attempts.
Many of us have ideas, dreams, and passions, but never manifest them. They don’t get up and just do it. But you did. Was there an “Aha Moment” that made you decide that you were actually going to step up and do it? What was that final trigger?
It has now been five years since that hospital stay. I’m doing better, but to say it’s been smooth sailing would be a blatant lie. The road to mental wellness is a winding one, full of potholes and redirects and the occasional fire-breathing dragon. Only my closest friends/family knew what had happened… most just heard the “burned out at work, took a break” story to explain my 5-month absence. In the Fall of 2019, my business partner and I were exploring options for employee health insurance and were gifted tickets to a speaking competition by our broker. At that event, I saw brave soul after brave soul get up on that stage and share their stories — stories of trauma, of discrimination, of triumph over adversity. And just like that reality snowball of puberty, another ball of frost smacked me right in the noggin. I knew then and there that I had to do the same as these folks. That my journey and my struggles had to have another purpose. That I needed to speak out to pave a safer road for those who come after me. And I’ve not shut up since!
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you began leading your company or organization?
I often fall into the trap of assuming the two parts of my life (pre-suicidal and post) are two separate lifetimes. So when someone from the former shows up in the latter, it really catches my attention. When I first began speaking out, it was early 2020 and thus all presentations were done virtually. I didn’t step onto a stage in front of a live audience until late 2021. There were only about 50 people in the theatre (lockdown restrictions were still in effect) so even though I won the competition that night with my speech, it still felt small and safely contained. That all changed when video of my 5-minute speech hit the internets. Suddenly, my inbox was flooded with messages from friends, colleagues, total strangers… and from one former-acquaintance. During some of the worst of my undiagnosed days, I had a horrible falling out with an old friend and roommate. It was devastating both at the time and within the rumination Greatest Hits 10 years later, there he was in my LinkedIn DMs, congratulating me on both the competition win and on my continued perseverance. I don’t believe I ever responded, but that message meant a LOT to me when I saw it. It must have taken such courage for him to both seek me out and write that note, and I will fully admit to needing to sit down before reading it. But it brought comforting closure to an otherwise awful story, and I’m so grateful.
None of us can be successful without some help along the way. Did you have mentors or cheerleaders who helped you to succeed? Can you tell us a story about their influence?
I met my partner Alex in summer 2020. We sized each other up and did a mutual “yes, this one” rather early on. I moved in after our 4th date, and in time he became not only my partner and confidant, but also my speech editor. I still struggle with recurrent depressive spirals, and he has learned the best ways to support without smothering. I am in awe of him every single day. My brain will occasionally fire snowballs in all directions, and I’m still learning how to best reel them in without causing a flood. I suspect I would have collapsed under the weight of self-doubt if not for him most days.
According to Mental Health America’s report, over 44 million Americans have a mental health condition. Yet there’s still a stigma about mental illness. Can you share a few reasons you think this is so?
I see a big misunderstanding between the terms “mental health” and “mental illness.” They are correlated, for sure, yet entirely different concepts. Mental health, just like physical health, is something everyone has some degree of. We can be in poor physical health if we’re feeling run down, yet not have a physical illness. We can also suffer decreased mental health whether we have a diagnosed mental illness or not. And vice versa. I have multiple diagnosed mental illnesses yet still have some good mental health days. Mental health can benefit from drinking water, spending time outside, chatting with loved ones, eating more vegetables, etc. But mental illness can’t be cured by those means alone. I see the two often confused and used interchangeably, leading to a societal belief that mental illness is simply a failure of self-care that can be solved with a good walk around the block. I truly wish that were true, but for most of us who are daily commuters on the struggle bus, it’s just not so. Therefore I focus my efforts on greater advocacy and awareness, rather than individual counselling. We need to change mindsets on disabilities of the mind before we can improve the status quo.
In your experience, what should a) individuals b) society, and c) the government do to better support people suffering from mental illness?
- Individuals have a responsibility to better educate themselves on the realities facing their friends and coworkers with mental illness or neurodiversity. In this modern age of information accessibility, ignorance is just no longer a viable excuse.
- Society has a responsibility to normalize a wide spectrum of what we consider “normal.” What’s normal to each individual is a subjective parameter based on what’s familiar. The more diversity we are exposed to, the more ‘normal’ diversity becomes. Yes, absolutely this applies to race and gender diversity — however different approaches to professionalism, to problem-solving, and to social etiquette should also be highlighted. If less folks feel excluded, perhaps less folks will feel optionless. That suicide rate is far too high lately. Far too high….
- Government’s job is simple; to prioritize mental healthcare equally to that of physical health care, and then improve upon both. I live in Canada where our emergency healthcare is universal, yet our preventative is definitely not. The wait for psychiatric care is often longer than the wait for medically assisted death. In most countries, your access to care is dependent on your access to cash — and that way of thinking needs to end now.
What are your 5 strategies you use to promote your own well-being and mental wellness? Can you please give a story or example for each?
- First off, I share this tip in pretty much every interview or podcast guest spot I do. Take out your phone and make a new note or a contact entry with the local support resources for your area. Do it now when you’re feeling ok; do NOT wait until you are in crisis to Google a support link. Personally, I’m a regular user of the anonymous text support from 741741 (just text HOME to that number to reach a trained responder). I reach out to that line when I’m feeling a panic attack coming on, or when my self-harm urges are kicking in. The people on the other end are wonderful. It’s a free and anonymous resource.
- I recognize that I can’t do this alone. I once heard a radio ad that ended with “if you could have done it alone, you would have done it already” and while I understand it was used with the aim of selling weight loss coaching, I’ve kept that mantra handy as reassurance that I need a whole team of professionals on my side. I see my psychiatrist monthly (or more often if in crisis), my general practitioner multiple times a year, and a therapist when I can afford it. I also have trusted people I can be honest with, and some good online support forums when all else fails. Different crisis moments will need different approaches. Give yourself every option you can.
- My personal treatment approach includes prescription medication. Your experience may be different, we’re all unique snowflakes after all. I’ve learned I must keep taking my medication consistently and exactly as my doctor has prescribed it. If I notice any side effects or don’t feel optimal, I talk to my psychiatrist about making changes. We’ve tried dozens of different medication combos over the years and had to switch things up again just this past summer. Head Meds are like shampoo; sometimes you need to change your formula.
- Gotta laugh or you’ll cry. If I let myself get too doomsday about my mental illness, I’ll spiral even deeper into that dangerous pit. And I know that nothing good is at the bottom. Laughing about suicide and mental illness may seem dark and inappropriate to anyone not suffering, but to us? Sweet, sweet comfort. I adore Maria Bamford and her realistically bleak stories of time spent within inpatient psych wards. So relatable…
- Snack. Walk. Nap. In that order. If I feel a spiral coming on, I get a snack. If it was just a blood sugar dip, I’ll feel better. Still spiraling? I’ll take a walk outside (sometimes my partner Alex has to drag me off the couch). Still spiraling? Hey, it happens. At this point, I take myself to bed. 99% of the time, I’ll wake up feeling less crummy. Still crummy? See tip #1 and get texting.
What are your favorite books, podcasts, or resources that inspire you to be a mental health champion?
I’ve been digging into Michael Pollans’ work on psychedelics for potential treatment of mental illness and addiction. The fresh research in this area gives folks like me (whose illness has proven treatment-resistant) a new hope to cling onto. I am also comforted by how mental health struggles are being portrayed and normalized in some newer entertainment media and video game narratives. “Stardew Valley” (Concerned Ape) is one of my favorites; it’s an indie game from a few years back that is one part farming simulator, one part alien mystery, and a whole lotta psychiatric realism. The characters face realities of addiction, depression, anxiety, isolation, self-doubt, PTSD… I could go on for hours about this game. I also like the Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast. It’s comforting to know that there are others out there who know exactly what we are experiencing inside our heads.
If you could tell other people one thing about why they should consider making a positive impact on our environment or society, like you, what would you tell them?
That it truly takes a village. We don’t all have to be world-famous motivational speakers or have billions of TikTok followers to make an impact. Sometimes we’re just one person talking to one other person. But it’s those conversations that can really stick with someone, and possibly save a life along the way. Don’t discount your own impact; you’re somebody to someone.
How can our readers follow you online?
My website is kristinlight.ca and I’m all over the socials as @kristinmelight. I love hearing from new folks!
This was very meaningful, thank you so much. We wish you only continued success on your great work!
About the Interviewer: Inspired by the father of PR, Edward Bernays (who was also Sigmund Freud’s nephew), Michelle Tennant Nicholson researches marketing, mental injury, and what it takes for optimal human development. An award-winning writer and publicist, she’s seen PR transition from typewriters to Twitter. Michelle co-founded WasabiPublicity.com.