Overcoming Anxiety: Shari B Kaplan of Cannectd Wellness On Five Effective Strategies for Mental Well-Being
An Interview With Nancy Landrum
I have a morning routine, including Movement, music breathwork, yoga, HIIT exercise, meditation, self-reflection, writing, nutrition preparation, spending time with my animals, speaking with my children and dolling myself up for the day.
Anxiety seems to be the dis-ease of our times. More people than ever are taking medications to help them cope with stress. Nearly everyone I talk to is consumed with anxious feelings that hijack any pleasure they could be getting from their lives. The pressure to “produce” combined with a perception of “not enough time,” combines to create anxiety, self-doubt, frustration and resentment. Resentment, then, is often taken out on your closest, most important relationships. As a part of this series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Shari B. Kaplan.
Shari B. Kaplan, LCSW, is founder/clinical director of Cannectd Wellness (www.cannectd.com). She is a pioneer in the field of integrative mental health treatment, a transformative approach to mental healthcare focusing on root causes of mental health and chronic pain symptoms. Shari’s own groundbreaking work in integrative mental health is with plant-based medicine, the Whole Life Plan©, offering a new paradigm in wellness and healing. As a trailblazer in her field, she forms an integral part of the bigger picture to revolutionize healthcare, while harnessing a sense of community, fostering understanding and setting a new standard of care which prioritizes the individual.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dive in, our readers would love to “get to know you” better. Can you tell us a bit about you and your backstory?
I’m a proud alumna of Fordham University where I obtained my Master’s in Clinical Social Work, which set me on my path marked by compassion, innovation, and a commitment to healing and has to date led to three decades of experience in mental health. I started out as a Volunteer Counselor in New York where I counseled patients with HIV/AIDS, and have over the years worked with children, adolescents, individuals, couples and families needing treatment for a wide range of issues from alcohol and substance abuse, to trauma, PTSD, anxiety, OCD, behavioral difficulties and eating disorders, and much more.
I’m now founder and clinical director of Cannectd Wellness, which I started in 2017,with a focus on integrating mental health with plant-based medicine and ketamine-assisted therapy for wellness and healing. I’m driven by the need to help others through pushing the boundaries of conventional treatment and embracing a holistic philosophy, one that interweaves the physical, mental, and spiritual. It’s a pioneering approach, and one that I want to see people from all walks of life have access to.
As a successful person in your field, have you or do you experience anxiety? And if so, how do you manage, reduce or eliminate anxiety so you can work efficiently and enjoy your non-work hours?
When people ask me if I feel anxious or overwhelmed, I often respond that I feel overloaded. This may be because I perceive my body as a collaborative component in my day. There’s a very fine line between anxiety and preparedness. It is the same neurobiological response. So if you wake up in the morning and your heart is pounding with a sense of alertness, are you anxious or is your body smart enough to prepare you for your day because you are overbooked or perfectly booked? When you’ve done the repair work on your chronic or traumatic stresses, have self-regulation tools, understand the physical sensations in your body and what they are telling you that you need, and your mindset is focused on your deliberate intentions, it is much easier to perceive your racing heart and adrenaline rush first thing in the morning as being prepared for your day and not anxiety.
Not to sound cliché, but this is a journey, not a destination. I have a daily practice that eases me into the day, even though I may wake up with my body prepared to start the day there are still morning organizational exercises I do. Breathwork, meditation, movement for different parts of my body, including my eyes and hands, HIIT exercise, yoga, and putting together my nutrition for the day. The morning hours are the times that I truly use to prepare my body, mind and soul for the day to come and set my deliberate intentions.
Have you gone through a period of time in your life where you felt as though you were drowning in anxiety? If so, please share your experience and what you perceive as the reasons.
There was a period in my life when both my children had medical challenges, I had medical challenges, and we had very significant traumatic events occur within a period of nine months. I didn’t have a choice to be drowning in anxiety. I had to pull on every tool in my toolbelt to financially provide for my children, and take care of all of our medical and emotional/psychological needs.
Creating order, staying present in my body with mindfulness, breathwork, meditation, exercise, yoga, a few good friends and my spiritual beliefs were all integral aspects of staying grounded. Anxiety was not an option for me. Preparedness was what I needed and staying present with love and support, both from myself and my children and at the same time, all the patients in my practice. I was very fortunate to have done my internal work prior to all this, as well as having a few good people surrounding me/us.
What or whom did you lean on to help you cope with anxiety?
I have a few amazing friends and some loving family.
What lessons did you derive from that dark period of time, that serve you now?
I learned that just because you’re not anxious doesn’t mean there’s not tension in your body that can physically hurt you medically.
I learned a lot about who will stand by your side as you go through tragedy.
I learned the subtle nuances that happen from traumatic stress that you don’t learn as a therapist. This has been extremely helpful in developing treatment modalities for my patients.
I learned that my bar is so high for emotional and physical pain that I don’t have to sweat the small stuff.
I learned how to ask for help from the people I know who will help and not from those who won’t.
I learned that there will always be people who will betray you and others who will love and support you. Find your tribe and life becomes so much more enjoyable!
I learned that the Universe works for me, with me and threw me, and that I am never alone, even when I’m by myself.
I learned that I am a Badass and there are a lot of other people out there being Badasses. I love to connect with them and share our strength with each other and for the greater good of humanity.
I learned that I can do anything that I put my intentions on, create strategy around and take baby steps in the direction I want to go, and the Universe will guide and support me.
Do you have days or circumstances that still cause excessive stress?
Building too much in my schedule and the demands that it places on my body.
What are your dependable “go to” strategies that you use to restore balance to your emotions?
I have a morning routine, including Movement, music breathwork, yoga, HIIT exercise, meditation, self-reflection, writing, nutrition preparation, spending time with my animals, speaking with my children and dolling myself up for the day.
Please name five tips, practices, beliefs or affirmations that you recommend to anyone going through a highly stressful time.
1 . Morning routine and evening routine
2 . Breath work, movement, music that soothes and awakens, meditation, writing
3 . Yoga and exercise
4 . Singing
5 . Setting deliberate intentions and putting an alert in your phone to remind you of your intention throughout the day and to breathe!
On a scale of one-ten, if 8–10 was your former, chronic level of anxiety, how would you score your usual level of anxiety today?
My chronic level of stress is probably 8–10 daily but through my self-care routine I experience my day usually around 2–4 and really enjoy myself.
Do you have daily practices that support you in maintaining peace, calmness or balance in your life?
We blast Broadway show tunes, rock and roll, and sing and dance when we get into the office. This gets my team and I feel excited and connected instead of anxious and stressed.
Was there any particular saying, person, or book that taught you the skills that enable you to escape or avoid the higher levels of anxiety that used to plague you?
I learned how to meditate when I was 11 years old from the Silva mind control method, which is now called the Silva method. When you learn at a young age that focusing your mind will help change your body’s biology, this can be a very powerful tool. It became my belief in life and how I navigate through so many of life’s challenges. That and a handful of amazing people who have stood by my side as I walked through the fire and came out the other side.
Are there also other ways you are sharing your wisdom?
Through my work and sharing compassion and kindness as I move through my day.
Is there a person in the world, or in the US, with whom you would like to have a private breakfast or lunch, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we tag them. :-)?
Oprah.
You are a person of enormous influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. :-)
I have a foundation called the Can’t Tell Foundation. My ultimate goal for the foundation, before I leave this planet, is to provide every child in foster care with my trauma treatment program created for teens who have been traumatized. I believe the children in foster care are one of the forgotten people in the world. Our society yanks these children out of their abusive or neglectful homes, throws their clothes in plastic bags if they’re lucky, and sticks them with strangers who may or may not be kind people, and then expects them to be healthy people in society without much support. This has got to change on so many levels. Privately funded organizations are going to have to step up. The role that I would like to play in correcting these injustices, would be to offer these young people amazing trauma treatment, kindness, mentoring, support, and an experience of self-care and how to bring that into their daily lives.
How can our readers follow your work online?
Via my website: www.cannectd.com and also via Instagram / Facebook / LinkedIn.
Thank you so much for joining us. This was very inspirational.
About the Interviewer: Nancy Landrum, MA, Relationship Coach, has authored eight books, including “How to Stay Married and Love it” and “Stepping Twogether: Building a Strong Stepfamily”. Nancy has been coaching couples and stepfamilies with transformative communication skills for over thirty years. Nancy is an engaging interviewer and powerful speaker. Nancy has contributed to The Washington Post, Huffington Post, Authority, Medium, Yahoo, MSN, Psych Central, Thrive, Woman’s Day magazine, and more. Nancy is the Founder of the only one of its kind online relationship solution, www.MillionaireMarriageClub.com. Nancy coaches couples across the globe in person and via Zoom. Nancy’s passion is to guide couples and families to happy lasting marriages where children thrive and lovers love for life.