Power Women: Alyse Bacine of Alyse Breathes On How To Successfully Navigate Work, Love and Life As A Powerful Woman

An Interview With Ming Zhao

Owning your power. As women we receive subtle programming, or conditioning of the subconscious mind, from society that we shouldn’t show up in our fullest and unique potential, because it will make other people feel uncomfortable. Due to this assumption, we play small and are afraid to speak our minds, come up with innovative solutions, be authentic, and ultimately show what we’re really capable of. We hide parts of ourselves in order to not disturb the status quo. This is NOT how women become successful. At every obstacle, I’ve had to dig deep inside myself and let go of the worry to make other people feel uncomfortable. And yes, while I’m sure I’ve made people feel uncomfortable by being authentic to myself, I’ve inspired and activated just as many people, if not more.

How does a successful, strong, and powerful woman navigate work, employee relationships, love, and life in a world that still feels uncomfortable with strong women? In this interview series, called “Power Women” we are talking to accomplished women leaders who share their stories and experiences navigating work, love and life as a powerful woman.

As a part of this series I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing Alyse Bacine.

Alyse Bacine is a Breathwork Practitioner, Spiritual Mentor, and the CEO of Alyse Breathes LLC. She has her Master’s in Counseling Psychology and certifications in both Social Emotional Learning and Mindfulness Practices, as well as an extensive background in the mental health field. Knowing that she wanted to expand her mission of healing familial and ancestral trauma, and normalizing mindfulness, meditation, and breathwork practices, she opened her own business and quickly became a six-figure mentor. Alyse helps high-achieving women that feel stuck in their wealth, partnership, psychic abilities, or trauma, transform their current realities to get to their next-level selves. Her programs are deeply rooted in healing so that women can navigate work, love, and life as powerful leaders, without the burden of trauma playing a role in their highest potential.

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dig in, our readers would like to get to know you a bit more. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood “backstory”?

Yes! I grew up in a suburban Philadelphia neighborhood in a pretty traditional family setting. I was an only child and always super sensitive, empathic and tuned into other people’s energies around me without even trying. I later found out that I was psychic, which explained all of the experiences that I was dealing with as a child. However, as an adult I realized that this sensitivity was a massive part of my abilities and the way in which I help people heal.

I was also always fascinated by any system or ideology that hinted at a deeper knowledge of what was below the surface, such as astrology, psychology and mysticism. I wanted to understand individuals, their motivations and why they did what they did. I wanted to uncover more, because a lot of it never made any sense to me. Some may even say that I was a rebel. I’d push boundaries and see how far I could go without following the rules.

Because I was quiet and unassuming, I always hid under the radar so to speak. I was a history major in college, along with secondary education. I wanted to understand what really happened, how society came to be and what really shaped humans into who they are today. I gravitated towards alternative research, like Howard Zinn in college, who is an American historian and philosopher, and always had the urge to continuously question the status quo.

Can you tell us the story about what led you to this particular career path?

I was actually a school counselor for 10 years. I got my master’s degree in counseling psychology in my late 20s. I had tried teaching for a bit since that was my undergrad degree, but quickly realized that it wasn’t for me. I thought being a counselor would be a better fit, and it did until I found my purpose.

To understand my whole journey, I want to go back to 19 years old, when I found yoga and breathwork, which was the catalyst that got me to my career path today. In the beginning of college, I struggled with an eating disorder and anxiety. I wasn’t sure why and that led me to my search for answers. That’s how I found breathwork. I became immersed in it, took four breathwork training programs, and a teacher training program within a 4 year span. I began teaching group breathwork classes and took on private clients for years. I loved it and knew it was something that I’d eventually share with people in a big way, but at that time I didn’t have the wherewithal to start my own business.

After that, I moved to Tucson for a while, bartended, and enjoyed life. When I came back, I decided that I needed to get my master’s degree and shortly after became a school counselor, where I did that for 10 years. Towards the end of my career as a counselor, I started feeling this very powerful nudge to step into my potential as an intuitive. I had always known deep inside that I was only utilizing about 10% of my gifts and abilities as a school counselor. I knew there was more that I was meant to do, and I had the ability to help people in tremendous and profound ways.

At the end of 2019, I started my business. Originally, I thought it was just going to be about breathwork, but it quickly evolved into so much more. Within my work, I utilize my intuitive gifts and extensive background in psychology to help people clear trauma very quickly, and even created my own very powerful tools to guide people to their life’s purpose; which in turn creates a life beyond what they could have ever imagined. To be honest, I didn’t even know that I was this powerful until I took a leap of faith and started my business. I officially left my school counseling job in 2020 and shortly after became a six-figure mentor.

Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you began your career?

When I was a school counselor, I had been working at the same school for 7 years and I was very comfortable there. It felt like home and the staff felt like my family. At the end of my 6th year, some of the staff members got together and tried to get me fired! This was highly traumatic for me.

I have never been a rule follower. Especially if the rules don’t make sense to me. This didn’t always bode well for me working in a school! I put the kids’ needs first, and if a student was in a crisis or needed support, I would always put their needs above the school regulations. Some of the teachers didn’t like that attitude. I definitely triggered a lot of the staff members there, because I did my own thing and never apologized for it. And not to mention that I was really good at my job.

I quickly realized that this whole situation was the sign that I needed to finally leave my job and make a much larger impact. Even though it was extremely upsetting and quite traumatic, it was probably the best thing that ever happened to me career wise. If it hadn’t, I probably would have stayed at that job even longer because I was so comfortable there.

You are a successful business leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?

The character traits that were most instrumental to my success are devotion, vision, and trust.

• When I say devotion, I mean devotion to myself, my vision and what I knew to be true. To me, it meant not giving up even when I perceived myself as a failure because I knew that I was meant for more. Once I learned this, started to truly feel it and applied it to my business, everything shifted. I went “all in” energetically on myself and my business without a plan B, because I knew that it was going to work out.
• Vision is so important. Having a clear vision of who I was and what I was meant to do on this planet was everything. Not only that but sticking to my vision and holding it for myself even when it didn’t seem like others could see it or understand. This was also about not letting other people’s perceptions and opinions affect my vision. It required a certain level of confidence in myself.
• Trusting myself was EVERYTHING. This meant trusting my intuition and inner guidance, even when it didn’t make any sense to my logical brain. Trusting my ability to listen to myself and know what was best for me and my business (and take action around that) truly was the final step that helped me achieve my success. I believe that this is one of the bravest things that anyone could do for themselves, their business, and their lives.

Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the primary focus of our interview. The premise of this series assumes that our society still feels uncomfortable with strong women. Why do you think this is so?

I spent many years studying the mind in and out of academics. — This may sound a bit extreme, but I believe that part of the reason why society is so uncomfortable with powerful women is because women naturally possess extremely potent intuitive powers; more so than men. Women have deeper access to their feelings and emotions and are more in tune with other people’s energy. We have the ability to make decisions from a place of inner knowing and intuition, rather than just relying on our logical mind, like men typically do.

I’m not saying that men can’t be intuitive because they most certainly can! However, this ability comes much more easily to women due to the connection to their emotions. This very ability is actually our superpower if managed properly.

A woman’s intuition has been downplayed and even made fun of for centuries, painting women out to be unstable or unreliable because of their emotionality. This is where I come in. I help women reframe their relationships with their emotions instead of getting overwhelmed by the process and guide them to trust their inner knowing. This may look like acting on a “gut feeling” instead of suppressing it and doing what they were told instead. By fine tuning this skill, women are able to add a sixth sense to our metaphorical tool kit in life and in business. I think this is ultimately what makes society, namely men, uncomfortable because they don’t quite understand the power that lies within each woman. It feels like this concept might be just beyond their grasp.

Without saying any names, can you share a story from your own experience that illustrates this idea?

When I was about 9 months into running my business, I was still working as a school counselor at the job mentioned above. I knew that I was supposed to leave my position and run my business full-time but hadn’t quite made the leap yet. I could feel it! And from a financial perspective, this move didn’t “make sense.” To add, I was working from home and technically still had enough time in my schedule to manage both workloads. Still, there was something telling me that if I wanted to get my business to the next level and be extremely successful, I had to let go of what no longer served me, which was my 9–5.

My husband had a VERY hard time understanding this decision. To his logical mind, it was financially responsible to continue doing both for “at least another year” because it made sense for our family. And he was right, on the surface it did “make sense.” However, I knew that in order to flourish in my new business, I needed to put all my energy into my brand. After many conversations with my husband, and me basically telling him that this is what I was going to do regardless of his opinion, I finally left my job. In less than 6 months, I made $20k — $30k per month, which was more than 10 times the amount that I was making as a school counselor.

I trusted my intuition even though my husband didn’t understand, and now here we are.

What should a powerful woman do in a context where she feels that people are uneasy around her?

When you are comfortable with yourself and have taken the time to heal your insecurities, fears, and trauma that lies within your subconscious mind, you are naturally less affected by what other people think of you. Of course, I’m super intuitive so I can feel when someone is uncomfortable or intimidated around me, so what I usually do is have compassion for them and move on. However, as I continue to dig deeper into my own work, I’ve realized that I’m not responsible for other people’s feelings or experiences. Ultimately, if they feel uncomfortable, it’s an opportunity for them to look at why they are projecting their feelings onto someone else. As a society, we need to get curious and learn from our own emotions. This is the most powerful tool for self-development! It’s time for humanity to step into our own power and take responsibility for our actions.

I like to think of myself and my work as a model for what is possible and an inspiration to others, instead of focusing on whether I’m making people uncomfortable or not.

What do we need to do as a society to change the unease around powerful women?

Getting more comfortable with ourselves, knowing ourselves on a deeper level as well as recognizing and embracing the immense power that exists within every one of us. The reason why people feel uncomfortable with women in power is because they have not acknowledged and fully embraced their own power. Every personal trigger we face is a “mirror” of what we need to work on. Sometimes, what makes us uncomfortable is actually our greatest teacher and an invitation to make a change for the better.

In my own experience, I have observed that often women have to endure ridiculous or uncomfortable situations to achieve success that men don’t have to endure. Do you have a story like this from your own experience? Can you share it with us?

Something I have noticed with some of the male clients that I’ve had is that they have a harder time fully surrendering control, taking my advice, and trusting my perspective. Most men that I’ve encountered feel a bit uncomfortable with a woman in her power, and the possibility that she may know a lot more than them. Especially when it comes to emotions and the deeper inner workings of our psyche.

In addition, Men can be super uncomfortable with my ability to use my psychic gifts to see deeply into their energy, why they do what they do, and the deeper pain that they’re holding onto. Especially when they see that I am aware of something within them that they are not aware of themselves. That can make men feel out of control. And historically speaking, men are taught to be in the driver’s seat of most situations.

I actually enjoy having male clients even though 90% of my clients are women. Yet, I often have to work to earn their trust in the beginning, until they fully trust me and feel comfortable with me being in the power position of the partnership.

In your opinion, what are the biggest challenges faced by women leaders that aren’t typically faced by their male counterparts?

Women tend to have to “prove” themselves whereas men are instantly trusted. This is especially true within the workplace. I’ve also noticed that women have to show that they can handle stressful situations, make quick decisions, make their own money and handle it wisely.

There’s still a stigma in our society, although it’s changing, that men know how to handle money better than women, which is a conditioned stereotype. It seems like women are still burdened with proving that they can handle everything just as well as men. This pattern is actually perpetuating the confidence that many women have when it comes to being a feminine leader. I want to mention again that due to women’s ability to be in touch with their emotions, they are able to see things for what they are and not act on certain triggers.

Let’s now shift our discussion to a slightly different direction. This is a question that nearly everyone with a job has to contend with. Was it difficult to fit your personal and family life into your business and career? For the benefit of our readers, can you articulate precisely what the struggle was?

One of my biggest struggles with running my own business when I first launched was knowing when to “stop” working. I have two kids and a husband. In the beginning, I would sacrifice my time with them in order to return messages or emails for my business. I quickly learned that I had to structure my business to support my family life.

When I started my business, it felt like a newborn baby. I felt that if I didn’t give it my constant attention, it wouldn’t survive. Once I started to see that this behavior was affecting my family, especially my kids, I created clear boundaries around my business and family life. By coming to this realization, I recognized that my business would be absolutely fine if I didn’t respond to every message and email immediately.

Lastly, I learned that I didn’t have to say yes to every single business opportunity that came my way. I could say yes to what felt good to me, still be successful, and allow myself to have time and space to spend quality time with my family.

What was a tipping point that helped you achieve a greater balance or greater equilibrium between your work life and personal life? What did you do to reach this equilibrium?

I’m really tuned into my kids behavior and with my background as a school counselor, I know with certainty that behavior is a way of communicating something, especially for children. Everytime my kids struggle with their behavior, I take it as a sign, an opportunity to tune in with them even more and see if they need my attention.

Back in the spring of 2020, when my kids weren’t in school due to the global crisis which happened to be the same time that I dove head first into my business, my kids’ behaviors, especially my son, started to change. This was my wake up call that I had to find a better balance between working and spending time with them. It was a lesson to learn that I couldn’t work 24/7 and also be fully present with my family.

I work in the beauty tech industry, so I am very interested to hear your philosophy or perspective about beauty. In your role as a powerful woman and leader, how much of an emphasis do you place on your appearance? Do you see beauty as something that is superficial, or is it something that has inherent value for a leader in a public context? Can you explain what you mean?

I truly believe in the famous quote “as within so without, as above so below.” I love feeling good in my clothes, putting on some makeup and feeling like I’m looking my best. Who doesn’t?! I don’t believe there is anything wrong with wanting to feel and look beautiful. Our outer expression, including fashion and makeup is an expression of who we are and how we feel on the inside.

The only reason there’s a stigma around this is because the media has driven so many women to be at war with themselves and their bodies, setting an impossible standard for what beauty is “supposed” to look like.

When a woman is in her fullest expression, loves herself and exudes confidence, it can be felt instantly. Individuals are magnetized to her authenticity, no matter what her body shape looks like or how much makeup she puts on her face. True beauty starts from the inside, but exudes outwardly. There is nothing wrong with wanting to have a beautiful outward appearance, it’s simply a physical expression of our energy, being, and soul.

How is this similar or different for men?

From my personal experience, I think that men equally care about their appearance, but hide it because they think that they aren’t supposed to care as much. On the contrary, I think that women get judged way more on their appearance than men do, due to society’s beauty standards. Men could show up looking messy and it would probably be much more socially acceptable than if a woman did. For some reason, it’s normalized for women to judge each other on their looks which is something that, as women, we have to work diligently to deprogram.

Ok super. Here is the main question of our interview. Based on your opinion and experience, what are the “Five Things You Need To Thrive and Succeed as a Powerful Woman?” (Please share a story or example for each.)

1. Owning your power- As women we receive subtle programming, or conditioning of the subconscious mind, from society that we shouldn’t show up in our fullest and unique potential, because it will make other people feel uncomfortable. Due to this assumption, we play small and are afraid to speak our minds, come up with innovative solutions, be authentic, and ultimately show what we’re really capable of. We hide parts of ourselves in order to not disturb the status quo. This is NOT how women become successful. At every obstacle, I’ve had to dig deep inside myself and let go of the worry to make other people feel uncomfortable. And yes, while I’m sure I’ve made people feel uncomfortable by being authentic to myself, I’ve inspired and activated just as many people, if not more.
2. Being unapologetic- As women we also receive programming that we need to apologize for being ourselves. Have you ever noticed that women tend to say “I’m sorry” unnecessarily? That we shouldn’t “be a burden” to others, ask for too much, or stand out too much. This narrative couldn’t be further from the truth. The only way to be successful is to show up in your fullest expression without apologizing. When you show up like that, you are magnetic, because you are embracing all parts of yourself and owning your full authenticity. When you do that, people just can’t help but want to be in your energy.
3. Never needing or asking for permission- This one is HUGE! Many of us have childhood wounds around having to wait to be told they can do something. One of the biggest patterns I see in women is that because they may not have received enough acknowledgement or felt fully seen as a child, they are subconsciously still waiting for someone else to validate them and tell them they’re worthy. Therefore, instead of stepping forward and creating the life that they desire, they remain in this “waiting” energy, unconsciously waiting for permission to act. The realization that I help my clients understand is, the only person who’s going to ultimately give you permission is you. You have to step forward without needing external validation to tell you that it is okay to act. You make it okay!
4. Not worrying about other people’s opinions- This one is so important. This is another thing that keeps women small. Worrying about what your family or friends will think of you if you do “x,” worrying if they’ll judge you or talk about you. This is meaningless and a total distraction, because we are also creating a narrative without knowing the actual outcome to a situation. In addition, any negative “opinion” that people have of you is their own unconscious projection of their insecurities that they haven’t dealt with yet. It has nothing to do with you. The quicker that you learn this, the happier you’ll be, and you’ll never waste time worrying about what other people think again.
5. Making yourself your number one priority- Once you realize that your energy is your most important commodity and you begin treating yourself as such, everything will shift. In society, we are taught to sacrifice our own wellbeing to help or save others! However, as taught by the airline industry, “you have to put your oxygen mask on first before you assist others.” If you don’t take care of yourself, you’re no good to others. Additionally, no one wants to work with someone who is depleted and has poor boundaries. Listening to what your body needs, what you need on an emotional and spiritual level, and giving it to yourself is the key to thriving and succeeding as a powerful woman.

We are very blessed that some very prominent names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them.

I have narrowed it down to three. I love Joe Dispenza and would love to sit down with him! His work has always fascinated me because he uses science to prove spiritual concepts that I’ve always felt to be true. I’ve benefited greatly from his work and I’d love to speak with him in person! Also, I’ve always admired Lacy Phillips’ concepts on the law of attraction. Her work really helped me get started on my journey of becoming an entrepreneur. I’d love to hang out with her for a coffee and chat about manifestation! Lastly, I really love Shaman Durek. His work helped to expand my mind in the beginning of my journey. I just love his perspective.

Thank you for these fantastic insights. We greatly appreciate the time you spent on this.