Power Women: Audrey Waldron of ‘She Does Official’ On How To Successfully Navigate Work, Love and Life As A Powerful Woman
An Interview With Ming Zhao
Positive mindset. You are your biggest critic. If you don’t have a positive mindset and let negative thoughts or actions sink in you will never achieve your goals. Think wrong, be wrong. You have to stay positive and keep moving forward. When the pandemic hit, and no one was traveling I could have easily folded and shut all this down. I believed in what I was doing and there was enough negativity in my life and world that it would have been easy to quit and the majority of the people I know would have agreed that it the right choice to just shut down the operation. I didn’t listen. I pushed and was able to keep a fledgling small business alive through one of the hardest times in recent history. I knew that if I kept a positive mindset that the designs and lifestyle message that we were developing would reach more women out there just like me. Those that need a voice that She Can.
How does a successful, strong, and powerful woman navigate work, employee relationships, love, and life in a world that still feels uncomfortable with strong women? In this interview series, called “Power Women” we are talking to accomplished women leaders who share their stories and experiences navigating work, love and life as a powerful woman.
As a part of this series I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing Audrey Waldron.
Audrey Waldron is on a mission to empower women through the inspiration of her own challenging story that got her to this point today. Raised in a small western town, co-owner of a very successful business, and found her way into swimwear modeling after having 3 children. She is the founder of She Does Official, a lifestyle brand that is fashion forward and reinforces a strong healthy women’s lifestyle concept through unique designs and empowering messaging. As a female founder, mom, corporate executive, and influencer she is creating positive women’s mind and body lifestyle products that support women creating and leading a life they love.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dig in, our readers would like to get to know you a bit more. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood “backstory”?
I grew up in a small western town and was raised mostly by my grandmother. When you’re born and raised in a small town there’s not a lot of opportunity for personal growth and your future generally has an outcome limited to the few options small towns provide. I always knew and felt that there was more for me beyond where I grew up. I was active in college and the community. Whether it was playing collegiate soccer, being classically trained on the piano, volunteering, snowboarding or hiking, I always wanted to grow and test myself physically and mentally. I graduated with a BS in Political Science and Public Relations and after college I became a flight attendant in order to see more of the country that I wasn’t able to experience as a child. It was a decision that started my path to being an entrepreneur.
Can you tell us the story about what led you to this particular career path?
I was a business owner along with my ex-husband, the normal busy wife and mom to 3 wonderful daughters who had long days with absolutely zero intention of becoming a swimwear model. My swimwear journey started by accident when my ex-husband posted a swimwear pick of me on Instagram and tagged the company I was wearing. That company asked me to be a brand ambassador and before I knew it, I was modeling swimwear for multiple brands. This of course led to meeting wonderful photographers, graphic artists, designers, etc. and stirred in me a passion to create my own line. I knew the fabric I liked, the cuts on a bathing suit that looked best on a woman and wanted to pivot from model to entrepreneur. This of course proved to be a much harder on-ramp than I had anticipated.
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you began your career?
Being able to walk New York Fashion Week 3 months right after we launched, and right after my divorce. It was a goal of sorts for me as a Brand, but also as a mother and strong person. Being able to show my daughters how to pick yourself back up, maintain focus in periods of uncertainty, and move on after a very hard period in our life was a very proud moment for me.
You are a successful business leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
1. Adaptability. As an emerging brand, I had to adapt to environments quickly, or you die off just as fast. Over the course of 2018 and 2019 we did our market research, found our target audience, had a marketing plan in place, and then a major life crisis hit. We finally launched the website in November 2019 and my husband at the time asked for a divorce during the same week. Fast forward a few months and we are walking New York Fashion week in February 2020. Then… the pandemic hit. I was up against a lot of unforeseen emotional, family and global issues. Being able to adapt and stick to what you initially set out to do you, is not for the faint of heart. We had a lot of traction heading into the spring of 2020, but we lost much of that as the whole world hit the pause button to make sure everyone stayed safe and healthy.
2. Trusting the process. It is a PROCESS! Overnight success stories are 1 in a million. All the blood, sweat, and tears that happens behind the scenes that social media doesn’t show. You have to really be determined and press forward here because that’s really where the magic happens and where the best lessons are learned. There’s a quote “you’ve prayed for the things that you have now.” By taking your time through each layer you’re really able to lean in the process. The little gains will drive you to accelerate through the process and find the next victory. Rushing can lead to errors. Do the hard work and earn the rewards. Nothing is given. I poured into reading entrepreneurial books, and one of my favorites is Phil Knights ‘Shoe Dog’. Towards the end of the book, he wished he could have done it all over again. Going through all the frustrations, the pain, the highest highs, the lowest lows, making hard decisions, and all the growth and lessons learned that comes from believing and growing something… he wanted to ride the ride again. Trust the process.
3. You’re never going to have all the information you’d like to make the best decision possible. You take the information you have on hand, keep your best interests in mind, stay true to yourself and brand and drive on. You do the best you can given the information and time you have to make that decision. It’s moving forward, not backward and taking that next right step that will show positive forward progress.
Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the primary focus of our interview. The premise of this series assumes that our society still feels uncomfortable with strong (sexy) women. Why do you think this is so?
When you become a mother, you are expected to adhere to some restrictive societal norms. Women who deviate from those norms are, in fact considered “deviants.” Generally characterized in a bucket by a number or derogatory terms meant to imply that a woman has loose morals, weak character, and no other way to make money or be successful unless they are showing some “skin”. I have definitely been characterized in this bucket because I model swimwear when none of the aforementioned applied to me. What I realized through my experience as a swimwear model and mother is that just because I’m a Mom doesn’t mean I can’t have sex appeal in a classy manner. A manner I don’t mind showing my kids. I shouldn’t have to kill off being me and embracing the hard work it took to diet, work out, conduct photo shoots just because I have children. I can be both and I’m not going to bury that desire to do more because societal norms may not support that lifestyle. Here’s the deal, I know I’m not alone. She Does is more than swimwear, She Does Sexy, She Does Nutrition, She Does Fitness, She Does Carpool, She Does Soccer Mom Duties, She Does It All!
Without saying any names, can you share a story from your own experience that illustrates this idea?
It’s hard to be a queen among queens. Competition is a real thing and unfortunately in this day and age women tend to view the main tactic in winning is by attempting to undermine another woman in particularly attacks aimed at degrading, shaming, or inflammatory attacks. I can’t tell you how many of my closest girlfriends turned their back on me once I started modeling. Inversely I can also tell you the true queens, my ride or die crew, stepped up and supported me in the toughest times. You find your tribe when you are authentic and unafraid to be all of who you are. There doesn’t need to be any jealousy or judgment, there is enough of that in this world to go around. I found the best thing for me was to work hard, keep good friends and family close, and take the moral high ground. Like Shakespeare said, “Heavy is the head that wears the crown”. I find my head isn’t so heavy once I realized I could eliminate the noise from my life.
What should a powerful woman do in a context where she feels that people are uneasy around her?
Kindness. Being kind and extending a compliment or a nice gesture first brings emotional walls down. I once had a friend tell me that I won her over by being being genuine. She saw my Instagram Page before she met me and immediately made assumptions about me as someone with loose morals. She had this idea of who she thought I was based off what she viewed on my page. Once she met me, she realized I was so much more than an image. The book is more than a cover. She told me I won her over the first time we met. She thought I was a kind, funny, relatable person that put everyone at ease the second we’d meet though my character and self-confidence.
What do we need to do as a society to change the unease around powerful women?
It’s a common misconception that every powerful, smart woman has a personality style like Beth Dutton (Yellowstone). Funny how some women and men are attracted to her power, but others find her personality lacking or aggressive. I think strong men and women would not be intimidated from the likes of a Beth Dutton style woman leader and those that have that lack of self-confidence are intimidated and uneasy. Embrace your core values, know yourself, always improve and be very careful about comparing yourself to others. Knowing your weaknesses and being brutally honest with yourself is the best comparison you can practice.
In my own experience, I have observed that often women have to endure ridiculous or uncomfortable situations to achieve success that men don’t have to endure. Do you have a story like this from your own experience? Can you share it with us?
I have often found that if you’re referred to as pretty or athletic that’s often as a woman a synonym for being incompetent. I have always worked hard to stay in shape and it wasn’t an easy thing to do and I was also a model, so I know I’m not hard on the eyes. I have found that if you have this combination you are likely going to have to work harder than the average male to gain the trust and confidence of someone far less capable than you may be. In college my Political Science professor called on me often to answer questions in class. I asked him one day after class why he always picked me. He said ‘people underestimate you and you bring up great points. I can’t figure it out yet, but you’re either going to be a wonder woman stay at home mom or a CEO…” That stuck with me because I love being a mother, but why can’t I be both?
In your opinion, what are the biggest challenges faced by women leaders that aren’t typically faced by their male counterparts?
I think that being a former model and mother can create a preconceived negative notion for me as a small business owner. I believe there is a stigma with a former woman model in the fashion industry where people may have the perception that due to her appearance, she got here by looks alone. I have done this with a lot of sleepless nights, my own money, tons of market research and rolling up my sleeves and winning and losing with trial and error. Again, the book is not the cover and I think women of all shapes, sizes, and varieties are going to be thought of in incapable in certain positions of authority. They are usually thought incapable by people of lesser moral fiber. You can’t change that. Don’t waste the energy in trying. Take the moral high ground and work harder. It will make you better for it and in the end the people around you, those that want to work with and for you will all change their perspective based on your success from all the hard work.
Let’s now shift our discussion to a slightly different direction. This is a question that nearly everyone with a job has to contend with. Was it difficult to fit your personal and family life into your business and career? For the benefit of our readers, can you articulate precisely what the struggle was?
Absolutely, you will fail at this. You will disappoint family, friends, your significant other because you feel the need to have a laser focus on accomplishing your goals. If you’re not focused on time management and you don’t have your your priorities in line, then the rest of your life doesn’t work as it should. You have to be selfish with your time. Be selfish with who and how you spend that valuable time. You must be a PhD in multi-tasking. I’ll be at soccer practice and answering emails or while we are driving home after practice and my daughters help me by answering texts and emails for me as I dictate them. This approach works for me, but it may not work for everyone. I believe you should find what works for you and embrace it. Also embrace that you will fail when you are trying to achieve success on all fronts of your life simultaneously. Just do your best and those that are important in your life will see all your efforts and overlook your failures. Those that don’t are probably people you need to give the most space.
What was a tipping point that helped you achieve a greater balance or greater equilibrium between your work life and personal life? What did you do to reach this equilibrium?
That I can’t achieve the high expectations that I set for myself in every aspect of my life simultaneously. I couldn’t be 100% happy with all the things I was doing or please all the people in my life to the level they required. Letting go of that guilt to be everything to everyone all of the time. I embraced that it was ok to be imperfect. I had to love my imperfect and realize that if I let someone down it was with love: I didn’t not want your time; I just had no time to give. The tipping point came in 2021 when I had to choose between prioritizing everything, I had going on to be a successful Mother, Business Owner, and maintain all my social connections. As much as I wanted it all, I just couldn’t do it all. I had to be selfish with my time and attention in order to achieve the goals for the brand and my personal goals with myself and family. That required cutting away social ties that I regret but were a requirement to be successful.
I work in the beauty tech industry, so I am very interested to hear your philosophy or perspective about beauty. In your role as a powerful woman and leader, how much of an emphasis do you place on your appearance? Do you see beauty as something that is superficial, or is it something that has inherent value for a leader in a public context? Can you explain what you mean?
I was born with certain attributes, but the majority of them I honed with hard work through no desire to be in this industry until much later in life. I like attaining goals which drove me in fitness and business. My approach to running a business and the successes I’ve achieved in that endeavor has nothing to do with appearance. You have to apply yourself and devote the work to your craft. Appearances got me in this business, my work ethic and determination made me successful.
How is this similar or different for men?
I think it all depends on the situation. There are men in female dominated business segments that struggle to achieve success. Obviously, there are numerous male dominated segments that gaining entry for a female, especially for a female who is in shape and considered good looking, is extremely difficult. Work hard. Never give them a reason to doubt that you earned it. Everyone has faced some obstacle to entry in something that dissuaded them from continuing. Strong moral fiber, sound character, surround yourself with good people. That recipe works. There will always be those who chose the low ground. Just don’t be there when it floods.
Ok super. Here is the main question of our interview. Based on your opinion and experience, what are the “Five Things You Need To Thrive and Succeed as a Powerful Woman?” (Please share a story or example for each.)
1. Determination. Don’t give up. Ever. If you stay the course and have the courage to do what you didn’t think possible it will take you beyond what you thought possible. Finding a competent manufacturer has been a problem from inception. During the pandemic all manufacturing was reduced to almost nil and my original provider never reopened due to the workforce being furloughed. I had to pivot hard to find new manufacturing and begin the entire vetting, first article approval, and full rate manufacturing process anew.
2. Patience. Not everything is on your timeline, nor will work out exactly how you thought it would in your mind. Stick with it and be patient with the process. Building a brand from ground zero is not easy. I’m not famous nor do I have a huge following to jump start a business venture. You have to have patience and be creative in building a brand. You have to be cautious not to jump on what is easy because it could be detrimental in the long term if it goes against your brand identity. You will be tested, just find the depth to understand most things that are great come with time and a lot of hard work.
3. Business Development. When I launched, She Does in 2019 the world was a completely different place for everyone on the planet than it is now. Our buying habits, what we desire, what we value, where we work, how we work, and how we view leisure. We had to completely change our design and business development approach to adapt to this new normal. We changed the look and feel of our suits from one that is more just singular purpose to a piece of clothing that can be multi-faceted. As women adjusted to multi-functional items in their life, we wanted to provide a suit that had more than one meaning. It’s about how the suit felt, not just how it looked. We wanted to make sure you could spend all day in the suit and feel like it wasn’t just a part of your day.
4. Passion: If you’re not passionate about what you’re doing, I would question if you need to be doing something different that actually drives you to want to succeed. I wake up every day thinking about how I can empower women with content and swim suits that help them feel confident. I want those same women to embrace the idea that sexiness, empowerment and confidence are all a mindset.
5. Positive mindset. You are your biggest critic. If you don’t have a positive mindset and let negative thoughts or actions sink in you will never achieve your goals. Think wrong, be wrong. You have to stay positive and keep moving forward. When the pandemic hit, and no one was traveling I could have easily folded and shut all this down. I believed in what I was doing and there was enough negativity in my life and world that it would have been easy to quit and the majority of the people I know would have agreed that it the right choice to just shut down the operation. I didn’t listen. I pushed and was able to keep a fledgling small business alive through one of the hardest times in recent history. I knew that if I kept a positive mindset that the designs and lifestyle message that we were developing would reach more women out there just like me. Those that need a voice that She Can.
We are very blessed that some very prominent names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them.
Sia, I am so moved by her music that her albums are on repeat in the background while I’m working. Each track is an inspirational story to me of how she overcame the struggles and hardships in her life while finding the strength to overcome these hurdles. This speaks to her inner strength as a woman and the character it takes to pick herself up after the challenges life brings. Though her challenges are different from mine, the words and the power in her voice speak to me at my core as she accepts each challenge head long. Her bio is one of struggle and hardship as well as being unabashedly who she is as a Woman. She doesn’t hide her struggles, she doesn’t hide who she is, and that is a powerful trait that I find so critical to me as an entrepreneur. As a Public Figure embracing the whole of who she is a woman who has shown me that if She Can do it, I can do it.
Thank you for these fantastic insights. We greatly appreciate the time you spent on this.