Regina Wallace-Jones of Mindbody: How We Can Leverage The Power Of Gratitude To Improve Our Overall Mental Wellness

Service — Serving others as often as possible has a way of pulling us outside of our own individual journeys and into community with others. Service renews the social contract that we should all maintain toward each other and it typically takes very little to be great at it.

As we all know, times are tough right now. In addition to the acute medical crisis caused by the Pandemic, in our post COVID world, we are also experiencing what some have called a “mental health pandemic.” What can each of us do to get out of this “Pandemic Induced Mental and Emotional Funk”? One tool that each of us has access to is the simple power of daily gratitude.

As a part of our series about the “How Each Of Us Can Leverage The Power Of Gratitude To Improve Our Overall Mental Wellness” I had the pleasure of interviewing Regina Wallace-Jones, SVP of Product at Mindbody.

Regina is a versatile leader with over 20 years of experience in high technology and operations leadership and is extremely passionate about the role she plays in all aspects of life — whether it be at Mindbody, her role as Vice Mayor of Palo Alto, or coaching AYSO soccer! Previously, she worked as the Chief of Staff at Facebook and then eBay, before landing her current role. Not only is she actively engaged within her industry with specialties in technical and business operations, data, process optimization, and more, but she’s an activist in her community as well.

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dive into our discussion, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share with us the backstory about you and about what brought you to your specific career path?

If anyone had asked me even five years ago, did I believe that I would be an executive at a wellness software as a service business, I might have laughed hysterically and most assuredly would have said no. But after years of working in tech companies that had hundreds of millions to billions of customers, on everything from social platforms to elaborate marketplaces, I can say that I am in the right place. I’m excited to bring my gifts to this very important industry at a time when the world is growing hungrier to find its way to wellness. Initially, what brought me to tech was my technical background. But what maintains my interest in this specific industry is a combination of care, empathy, passion and curiosity. Every day that I wake up, I get to wonder about and execute on ideas that have the potential to make us live life more expansively. How exciting!

Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?

Most interesting is so hard, because I can potentially become so interested in a wide range of things. The most surprising thing to me was beginning my journey at Yahoo while I was 27 weeks pregnant. I was sure that I would not get the job, but I did. And I was more loyal to Yahoo than any other company that previously employed me because of that willingness to look past a natural part of life and to instead choose to focus on my talent contribution.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Why do you think that resonates with you? Do you have a story about how that was relevant in your life?

I try to remind myself daily that “Everything happens exactly as it should.” When I crossed the chasm into my 40s, I remember letting go of the idea that I could somehow work hard enough to control all outcomes. This is a recipe for total insanity! Now, I know that my journey is not about controlling anything really. It’s more about learning to dance with whatever comes my way and developing the clarity to see opportunities to expand, learn and grow in all circumstances. For me, this includes everything from illness to promotions. It’s an attitude that is equally valuable to embrace in successes and failures.

Is there a particular book that made a significant impact on you? Can you share a story about why that resonated with you?

I take in a book a week, but a book that I have appreciated most recently is “Lead from the Outside” by Stacey Abrams. She has emerged for me as a new archetypal leader that is part public servant, part executive, part philanthropist, part community organizer and part matriarch. Most of us try hard to place people in buckets. And what is surprising and refreshing about this book and her work in general is that it is impossible to put it in any particular existing bucket. By leveraging all of her leadership identities, she has been successful in driving toward outcomes that many thought impossible. This is inspiring for me because I am certain that my leadership path is divergent and that I often call on a broad range of energies to achieve results. I used to think I was an outlier, and maybe I am. But Stacey affirms that if I am an outlier, I am not the only one.

Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that will help people?

I try my best to always be working on at least one exciting thing. So, right now, I am working on a product for SOLO Wellness practitioners. These are practitioners that run business all by themselves with no employees. They make up the largest part of wellness business owners. Sadly, few companies are innovating on behalf of SOLO practitioners. In 2021, I have prioritized them because they are some of the most resilient and hungry practitioners that I know. And I can’t wait to bring forward a product that honors their hustle and supports their success.

Personally, I am also working on a podcast. I’ve given myself a year to launch it but hope to reveal interesting intersections between my work in tech and in the public sector. As a tech executive and a public servant, I find my experiences unique and have been able to draw strength from each area to strengthen the other. I want more tech people influencing and leading in the public sector and I want more public sector altruism to influence the tech sector. Taking the time to be transparent about ways to do both is something that I believe will be additive for myself and others.

None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

The tech sector is not short on not-so-great leaders and, honestly, I’ve had my fair share over the years. But I’ve had an exceptional run with an extraordinary leader that has been supportive of my leadership journey and is consistently open to pushing new challenges my way. He has proven open to putting wind and momentum behind my ideas and continues to be an active and effective coach every step of the way. He has been the perfect model of good leadership for me. I express my gratitude openly and often because he is unique and gives me great hope that there is some leadership greatness in our ranks.

Ok, thank you for all that. Now that we are on the topic of gratitude, let’s move to the main focus of our interview. As you know, the collective mental health of our country is facing extreme pressure. We would like to explore together how every one of us can use gratitude to improve our mental wellness. Let’s start with a basic definition of terms. How do you define the concept of Gratitude? Can you explain what you mean?

To me, gratitude is all about gratefulness. Recently, my colleague had a tree fall in his front yard. It tore down a piece of his fence and made his lawn pretty messy. When he shared this with me, I responded by saying that I was grateful that it did not hit any people. It also did not hit his house, which would have been much more costly than his fence. The point is that even in the worst situations, we can find our gratefulness. And this practice of finding our gratitude is a key ingredient in our individual and collective journeys to wellness.

Why do you think so many people do not feel gratitude? How would you articulate why a simple emotion can be so elusive?

In modern day society, we have effectively cultivated a spirit of entitlement among people. We seem to constantly be ready to articulate what more we need and deserve. And when we orient ourselves toward entitlement, it is very easy to become numb to other ways of being, such as gratefulness. Taking a moment every day to reflect on life, breath, freedom from sickness, warmth, laughter, music and love, among other things, gives us a way of reorienting ourselves. I remember being the mayor of my city when we went into Covid-19 ‘Shelter in Place.’ I spent the year entirely consumed with solving problems for people. I literally worked up to a list of needs every day that I felt compelled to tackle. Six months in, I felt so heavy. But by month eight, I realized that I had forgotten my gratitude practice. The truth is that even in our individual and collective struggles, we all have so much for which to be grateful. In my case, I had escaped illness and had all of my daily needs met. Once I found my gratitude, I no longer felt heavy. Instead, I felt blessed to serve.

This might be intuitive to you but I think it will be constructive to help spell it out. Can you share with us a few ways that increased gratitude can benefit and enhance our life?

One of my most pronounced strengths is love of learning. If I didn’t have to make a living, I am pretty sure that I would be a lifetime student, so I try to emulate that reality in my day-to-day life as a leader. The pandemic has many people out of sorts with their normal routines — including me. But as I reflect on my love of learning from my place of gratitude, I can say that the pandemic has freed up more time for me to learn about my interests. Over the last year, I have churned through a new book each week, I have listened to more podcasts than I care to count, and I have ventured into territories that I previously had no time to explore. In a very challenging time, I know that I feel more complete than I have ever felt in my entire career in the realm of learning.

Similarly, I can be upset that my gym and salon have been closed for the greater part of the last year. Or I can choose to be grateful for the virtual fitness and home hair care solutions that have blossomed. They’ve given me more space to explore fitness disciplines that I would not have otherwise explored and different hair care regimens that I would not have otherwise engaged with. Both have given me more expansive ways of engaging with my wellness needs and made me much clearer about the “what” and “why” of my wellness pursuits.

I’ve heard many say that most of us will come out of the pandemic with new mental health challenges and greater needs for therapy than ever before. I did not wait to be out of the pandemic. I sought mental health support during the pandemic to help me cope with lack of social interaction, which a strong extrovert like me not only craves but needs. My therapist was also a big proponent of making my gratitude practice much more robust. At this point, I only see a cliff as a launch pad for flight to new levels.

Gratitude helps us focus our lens and see life more clearly and abundantly.

Let’s talk about mental wellness in particular. Can you share with us a few examples of how gratitude can help improve mental wellness?

My best example is one that is very close to me. I have a younger sister who was diagnosed with a very aggressive breast cancer five years ago. This has been a heavy weight on my entire family because cancer is so challenging and because she is young. For years, I struggled with how to talk about it, what to say and how to support her. Covid made it worse because she lives 2,000 miles away from me and I could not even visit her. For almost a year, I was too afraid to travel and also paralyzed by the thought of losing her. After struggling with this for a year and amidst significant deterioration of health, I decided to drive the 2,000 miles with my family in an RV because the pain of not seeing her was surpassing my will to be safe. Every day, I woke up grateful for time off to take a fun and ambitious journey with my husband and children. Every night, we went to sleep grateful for precious family time to see parts of the country that we rarely take time to see. And when I finally arrived at my destination, I was incredibly grateful for the time with my sister. I now know that I don’t want to lose her, but the time that I had with her gave me clarity about how to honor her legacy however her journey with cancer ends. And for that, I will be eternally grateful.

Ok wonderful. Now here is the main question of our discussion. From your experience or research, what are “Five Ways That Each Of Us Can Leverage The Power Of Gratitude To Improve Our Overall Mental Wellness”. Can you please share a story or example for each?

1.) Gratitude Journal — I recommend a daily practice. But start slow and work your way up.

2.) Meditation — I recommend a daily practice of no more than 10 minutes a day but you can work up to a unit of time that feels comfortable for you.

3.) Walking — When I get outside, I have greater appreciation for fresh air, seasonal colors, animals and sounds like streams and birds. When we take the time to notice these things it can be incredibly refreshing and rejuvenating.

4.) Service — Serving others as often as possible has a way of pulling us outside of our own individual journeys and into community with others. Service renews the social contract that we should all maintain toward each other and it typically takes very little to be great at it.

5.) Elevating our conversations to only the most purposeful things — This is helpful with reconstituting relationships and setting sights on higher aspirations.

Is there a particular practice that can be used during a time when one is feeling really down, really vulnerable, or really sensitive?

When I am feeling really down, vulnerable or sensitive, the first place that I go is to my therapist who helps me break down the source of the feeling or emotion and works with me to define a productive path forward. I say this because therapy is often assigned a stigma in many communities including the black community and the more we all breathe life into its strength and purpose, the more we make space for others to benefit from the same.

Do you have any favorite books, podcasts, or resources that you would recommend to our readers to help them to live with gratitude?

I am working my way through three books that I particularly like:

“Open Heart, Open Mind” by Tsoknyi Rinpoche

“The Sound of Silence” by Ajahn Sumedho

“Buddha and the Badass: The Secret Spiritual Art of Succeeding at Work” by Vishen Lakhiani

All three of these books call on meditation as a means of finding our center, our “why” and our gratitude. Each is wonderful in its own way at expanding on this very important way of living and being.

You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. :-)

Recently, I have become fascinated with our individual journeys toward sexual wellness. I am particularly interested in erasing social stigma and judgement while providing a safe space for people to explore, learn and grow. I am passionate about sexual wellness for everyone, but particularly for women, who make up more than half of the global population. I think that there are a number of important strides that we in wellness can make to enhance support for comfort with our bodies, our needs and our confidence in this arena. I want to remake this segment of wellness from the ground up. It’s time.

What is the best way our readers can further follow your work online?

I am a former Facebooker, so Facebook is my most frequently used channel for sharing work, accomplishments, triumphs, fears and concerns. It’s also how I most actively engage with my constituents. But I can also be found on LinkedIn.

Thank you for the time you spent sharing these fantastic insights. We wish you only continued success in your great work!