Rikki Lee Travolta Of Love & Light Productions: Five Things I Wish Someone Told Me When I Was First Diagnosed With Mental Illness
An Interview With Stephanie Greer
I wish I had been told when I was first diagnosed is that having a mental illness doesn’t make you less than anyone else. Having a mental illness doesn’t make you “weird” or “strange”, it just means you have a certain challenge that not everyone else has to navigate. People with mental illness are just as special and capable as any “normal” person.
Navigating the complexities of mental illness can be a solitary and daunting path for many. The initial diagnosis often comes with a deluge of emotions, confusion, and an overwhelming sense of uncertainty about the future. It is a pivotal moment where guidance and wisdom from those who have walked this path before can make a significant difference. As a part of this interview series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Rikki Lee Travolta.
Rikki Lee Travolta is an award-winning creative professional who has worked in theatre, television, film, music, and literature. He has achieved success despite living with mental illness, something he is open about so as to be a role model for others with similar challenges. His driving belief is that he can’t help being disabled, but he can show what a disabled person is still capable of.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! We really appreciate the courage it takes to publicly share your story. Before we start, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your background and your childhood backstory?
I started working in the entertainment industry at a young age. Continuing to be affiliated with industry as an adult, I have worked in theatre, film, television, music, and literature. I am the former head of public relations for several well-known brands and currently handle publicity for a selection of celebrities, as well as premier business clientele. I am a television producer for Love & Light Productions including The Polish Cooking Show on PBS, I continue to appear in select film and stage roles, and am among Chicago’s main pool of theatre critics. I do this despite living with mental illness. Some days are harder than others.
The symptoms of mental illness began to appear in childhood, and then dramatically so beginning in the teen years. Despite rampant symptoms that are now recognized in hindsight, because I am intelligent, there was a delay in diagnosing my mental illness. There can sometimes be a false belief by professionals and the afflicted themselves that if you’re smart, you can’t also be mentally ill.
After being diagnosed with mental illness as an adult, I started the long process of putting my life back together and pointing my ship in the direction of the healthiest life possible. I work with both a psychologist and a psychiatrist in managing my symptoms and medicating them as best as possible.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
Often, happiness is a choice. You can always find a positive way to look at circumstances, sometimes it takes some creativity and determination to do so, but it can usually be done. When you focus on the positives and not the negatives, you change your mindset. You set yourself up for success and for believing in yourself. Believing in yourself is the first step to pursuing your dreams. You’ll never pursue your dreams if you don’t believe in yourself, and I am of the firm belief we should all pursue our dreams.
Let’s now shift to the main part of our discussion. Can you share what your journey with mental illness has been like? Can you share the moment you first realized what you were experiencing was a mental illness, and how that initial understanding evolved with time?
I was a very troubled child. I had been sexually molested by people outside the family, and severely emotionally abused at home. In addition, mental illness is very present in my family tree.
When I was a teenager, my symptoms really started to escalate. However, when I told my mother I was having difficulty with my thinking and emotions, she threatened to have me “locked up.” Maybe it was just a bad choice of words by her, but it made me think that if people knew I was struggling with reality then I would be thrown in jail. I shut up and didn’t talk to anyone about my symptoms for decades. Instead, like many undiagnosed people, I learned to self-medicate with alcohol. After a lifetime of addiction, I turned my back on alcohol forever in 2014 — which is one of the best things I’ve ever done in my life.
Was there a turning point for you when things started to change for the better? Can you please share a story?
A lot of people say they knew I was mentally ill, or at least suspected it. But they never acted on those suspicions to get me help. Or if they did, I was too far gone into my illness to realize it or be receptive to the idea. Unmanaged, my life spiraled out of control. With no intention of it, I left a path of mayhem and destruction behind me. Ultimately, I became suicidal and was admitted to a mental hospital.
Even then, I was lost in a sea of delusions. I still had no idea I was mentally ill. I thought I would be released and life would go on as normal, but in reality, they feared I would have to be institutionalized for the rest of my life. What finally broke through to me was that my fiancé said if I didn’t accept my diagnosis then I didn’t have anywhere to come home to. She would leave me forever. That’s what I needed to break through a lifetime of fog and realize I was not well and had not been for a long time. That started the process of healing.
Who are some of the people in your life who have been on this journey with you? How have they either helped you or made things harder?
I am blessed to be in a relationship with an amazing woman. She and I were friends for two decades before getting involved romantically, so she has seen me from days of pre-diagnosis to today.
She makes my life better. She helps me manage my symptoms and translate my reality into this world. We all need someone in our corner.
My colleagues at Love & Light Productions are also very important and supportive. It is the kind of entertainment company that you can be proud to work for because not only do they produce quality entertainment, but they are also an assembly of truly good people.
How did your personal relationships and social interactions shift following your diagnosis, and what advice would you give to others navigating similar changes?
When you need help and it takes all the humility you can muster to reach out to your friends and ask for help, it can be an eye-opening experience of who cares for you. You’ll learn who views your friendship as being at their convenience.
I went through that. I was heartbroken to discover there were people I’d always been there for, who couldn’t be bothered when it came time for my needs. However, I have also been surprised by situations where people I barely knew came through and turned into lifelong friends.
My advice is that you be prepared to be surprised.
What are 5 things you learned from your journey that you think other people navigating life with mental illness would benefit from knowing?
1 . The first thing I wish I had been told when I was first diagnosed is that having a mental illness doesn’t make you less than anyone else. Having a mental illness doesn’t make you “weird” or “strange”, it just means you have a certain challenge that not everyone else has to navigate. People with mental illness are just as special and capable as any “normal” person.
2 . The second thing I wish I had been told, is that finding a medical cocktail to treat mental illness can be a lengthy process — but eventually, things should get better. I was a zombie for years as the doctors tried to find a collection of medications that would successfully allow me to function in day-to-day society. But you can only adjust one medication at a time and you have to give each one time to show if and how it will help. That’s why a simple medication change can be a process that takes years. Don’t give up hope.
3 . The third thing I wish I had been told relates to one of the hurdles that sometimes affect developing the proper relationship you need to have with your psychiatrist. I have seen several psychiatrists and heard similar experiences from peers. In most cases, the psychiatrist thought they knew better than their patients. This creates challenges in getting the treatment needed. The most common experience I’ve heard reported is that psychiatrists tend towards super overconfidence in which they think they know all. Chances are that your psychiatrist has no firsthand knowledge of what it is like to experience the symptoms of mental illness or how a medication might work or not affect them. Don’t forget that you as the patient are the authority on how a medication makes you feel. There are some psychiatrists out there who do listen to the level they should, but they are exceptions.
4 . The fourth thing I wish I had been told also relates to psychiatrists, it is that you shouldn’t settle for a subpar quality of life. Sure, as someone with mental illness, you will have challenges, but all too often I see medical practitioners expecting their patients to just settle for an existence of being a zombie or being incapable of having relationships. You must advocate for yourself. It is okay to not accept being over-medicated. It’s okay to not accept medication side effects that tarnish your quality of life like excessive weight gain, mood instability, and sexual dysfunctions. Would your psychiatrist accept these kinds of limits on their enjoyment of life? Probably not. So, you shouldn’t either.
5 . The fifth subject I wish had been broached with me when I was diagnosed was to never give up on yourself. Don’t accept the belief that having challenges means you aren’t able to do incredible things.
How has living with mental illness affected your relationships, both romantic and platonic? Any advice for others who are navigating relationships while managing the condition?
One of the most frustrating things about having mental illness is realizing after the fact that your symptoms caused worry or worse to loved ones. It can be daunting to look in the rearview mirror and know you have to repair all the damage that is visible in the path you’ve cut. Just take it one step out a time. You can fix things that have gone wrong. You can establish mutually respectful and beneficial relationships — but you have to work at it. You can either accept that you are damaged and use that as an excuse to give up on change, or you can dedicate yourself to living your best life by managing your symptoms and moving forward in every way possible each day.
Reflecting on your journey, what do you believe are the common misconceptions about mental illness that could be dispelled to support newly diagnosed individuals better?
Having a mental illness does not make you second-class. It does not mean you aren’t intelligent. It does not mean you don’t have talents. And it sure as heck doesn’t mean you are as good or deserving of respect as any “normal” person. After all, what is normal? Never let anyone disrespect you — not family, not doctors, and certainly not strangers. We all deserve to be respected and celebrated for our unique talents.
What strategies or practices have you found most effective for managing your mental health, and how did you tailor them to fit your unique circumstances?
A healthy body helps in maintaining a healthy mind. It is important to keep physically fit. It is one tool among many that can help manage your mental wellbeing. For me it’s pushups. I do several hundred pushups a day. The result is a body I’m proud of, and when you like what you see in the mirror it brightens your entire disposition.
Loneliness can be cruel. That’s why human contact is also important. Some people are blessed to have a family to reach out to. Others have friends they are close to. Don’t be embarrassed to reach out to your family and friends. We all need to feel connected to others.
Each affliction has its own symptoms and challenges. For someone like me who balances multiple diagnoses, there can be many strategies at work to most effectively manage mental health.
Looking back, what is one thing you would tell your past self in the wake of your diagnosis, and what message of hope can you offer to those who are just starting to come to terms with their mental illness?
Some believe that when we die, our soul goes to heaven. Others believe in reincarnation — our souls returning to earth in a new body after our time in our current body ends. Whether you believe in either of those scenarios or believe that life simply ends when we die, the fact is we only have one shot at this lifetime. I’ve been on this earth for 50 years and it seems like a blip in time. Life is short. If I could go back and tell my past self something, it would be to always persevere and to never settle. Too many years were lost trusting psychiatrists who didn’t listen and expected me to live a sub-standard quality of life because it would be easier than working to find medications that work the way I need to live my best life.
Are there any books, podcasts, or other resources that have helped you understand or manage your condition better?
I found the book “First Person Plural” by Cameron West very helpful in understanding dissociative identity disorder.
Since becoming diagnosed, I have been an outspoken advocate for those with mental illness. My own book about my journey with mental illness has been cited as beneficial by many readers. Look for “Unbecoming Travolta” — one of Amazon’s top dissociative disorder books. It also deals with bipolar and schizophrenia.
We are very blessed that some very prominent names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them. :-)
My feature film script “The Elvis Conspiracy” has won 13 Best Screenplay Awards in the last few months and is attracting interest from studios and name actors. It’s an alternative history script, which is a genre growing in popularity. People talk about Elvis almost as if he’s different people at different stages in his life: Young Elvis, Hollywood Elvis, GI Elvis, and Las Vegas Elvis. What if that were true? What if Elvis was someone created by Col. Parker using multiple young men, plastic surgery, and lip-syncing?
We hear interesting names being tossed around. I would love to see Johnny Depp, John C. Reilly, or Christopher Waltz read the script with an eye on the lead role of Col Parker. It’s the kind of role that wins awards.
A young up-and-coming actor like Antonio Capriano or Dacre Montgomery could change their entire career path as potential Best Supporting Actor Oscar nominee for playing multiple versions of Elvis.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Online, you can follow Rikki Lee Travolta at www.LifeandTimes.biz. Life and Times is your guilty pleasure for entertainment news, views, and reviews.
Also, make a point to listen to the podcast It’s Showtime with Rikki Lee — providing a backstage pass to all things entertainment including stage, film, television, and music. Available on Spotify and all major podcast apps: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/rikkileetravolta
Keep up to date on The Polish Cooking Show at www.ThePolishCookingShow.com.
Additional information on Rikki Lee Travolta’s entertainment career is available at www.RikkiLeeTravolta.com.
Thank you for your time and thoughtful answers. I know many people will gain so much from hearing this.
About The Interviewer: Stephanie Greer, PhD is the Co-founder and CEO of Akin Mental Health — a company dedicated to guiding families on their journey supporting a loved one with mental health challenges like bipolar disorder, schizophrenia and severe depression. Stephanie is passionate about this topic from her own personal experience growing up with a mother who struggled with bipolar 1 disorder and found a path forward to overcome the obstacles and live well. Stephanie’s professional experience includes a doctorate in neuroscience as well as design research roles at Hopelab and Apple. Stephanie brings this personal passion together with her world-class science and technology background to support families across the US in their personal journeys supporting loved ones with mental illness. To learn more about Akin Mental Health and join our community, visit us at akinmh.com.
