Sara Glazer of New York Health Hypnosis and Integrative Therapy On How We Can Solve The Loneliness Epidemic Among Young People
An interview with Pirie Jones Grossman
Make efforts to connect with others in a deeper fashion, by actively listening, establishing times to engage in meaningful activities and mutual hobbies and sharing thoughts and feelings.
Our youth are facing a loneliness epidemic like never before. They have “social” media, but many are lacking healthy social lives. Many have likes and virtual “friends” but not real live friends. They can text and tweet but not speak and listen and connect. And they are feeling it. Humans were made for real live interaction, and we crave it when we don’t get it, or don’t even know how to go about looking for connection. How can we solve this loneliness epidemic that young people face? As a part of our interview series about the ‘5 Things We Can Each Do Help Solve The Loneliness Epidemic Among Young People ’ we had the pleasure to interview Dr. Sara Glazer.
Drawing on her background in attachment theory, relational psychoanalysis and mindfulness-based approaches, Dr. Sara Glazer employs an integrative method that uses hypnosis techniques within an interpersonal lens for grief, self-esteem, social anxiety, and relational trauma. She aims to support clients in exploring how their struggles relate to their self-perception and relationships with others. As the therapeutic relationship contributes to the process of change, Dr. Glazer strives to create an atmosphere of mutuality, safety and empathic understanding.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share your “backstory” with us? What was it that led you to your eventual career choice?
It is my pleasure! Thank you so much for including me in this interview series. I grew up in a large, blended family. The sibling closest in age to me is thirteen years my senior. And so, I often maintained the observer role in my family of origin. I was interested in relational dynamics and psychology before I fully understood what those terms meant.
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?
Hmm, it is hard to choose. I was consistently surprised when working with children. I remember working with one boy who was very affected by a chain toy store going out of business. He exhibited sadness as well as other grief symptoms and asked a lot of questions about the store’s mascot (i.e., if he still had a home). He seemed to view this mascot as an object, likely containing aspects and attributes of various significant figures in his life.
It has been said that sometimes our mistakes can be our greatest teachers. Can you share a story about the most humorous mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson or takeaway you learned from that?
When I was in graduate school, I was working on a paper for my positive psychology class and I accidentally saved an earlier version of the paper, rather than the completed document. The paper was about spirituality and forgiveness (including forgiveness of self), which was a bit ironic, although it took me some time to view the mistake as ironic and humorous. Even after seeking help from the technology support at my school, I was unable to retrieve the document. Given that I had finished the paper right before the deadline, I didn’t have time to rewrite the portions lost and, out of options, I told the professor what occurred.
After that, I bought my first USB drive and learned to back my work up. I believe it increased my understanding when working with college students in a clinical capacity later in my training. At the time, I viewed my performance in school as being linked with my identity and career pursuits and so admitting that I procrastinated felt humbling and unsettling. It also taught me that, given the correct context, mistakes are part of a broader picture. Ultimately the professor of the course became my thesis advisor and so, in a way, the paper offered a genuine lesson in self-forgiveness and compassion.
Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that will help people?
I am presently focused on my clinical work. I have become interested in integrating parts work, such as concepts outlined within the Internal Family Systems model, to better understand and work with our seeming ambivalence related to change.
Can you share with our readers a bit about why you are an authority on the topic of ‘The Loneliness Epidemic Among Young People’?
My clinical work includes specialties in grief and loss as well as struggles within relationships. I often support clients in addressing feelings of loneliness, both inter and intra-personally.
Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the main focus of our interview. According to this story in the New York Times, loneliness is becoming an increasing health threat not just in the US, but across the world. Can you articulate for our readers 3 reasons why being lonely and isolated can harm one’s health?
Studies have shown that loneliness influences our immune systems and that the genetic effects of significant periods of loneliness include increases in inflammatory responses. Loneliness and isolation have also been linked with an increase in heart disease and stroke. From an evolutionary perspective, we are hard-wired to attach to others. When we perceive that this need is threatened, our brains release stress hormones. The link between loneliness and increased cortisol as well as sleep disruption might account for its association with physical health. Finally, loneliness and isolation have been linked with mental health symptoms, such as anxiety, depression and suicide.
Based on your experience or research, are children impacted differently than adults by the loneliness epidemic? How?
Given the critical period of development that takes place in childhood and adolescence, adverse experiences can be particularly impactful. Connection with others is necessary for social and emotional development and, as noted earlier, stress related to the absence of connection can interrupt physical activity and sleep, both factors that are needed to grow. Additionally, due to the individuation period that typifies adolescence and young adulthood, these age groups can be particularly vulnerable to isolation.
On a broader societal level, in which way is loneliness among our youth harming our communities and society?
Loneliness impacts our sense of felt safety, and expectations and attunement to interpersonal threat. This can impact exposure to new opportunities and, at times, evoke behaviors from others that reinforce these beliefs. This reinforcement loop might maintain loneliness and its adverse health outcomes.
The irony of having a loneliness epidemic is glaring. We are living in a time where more people are connected to each other than ever before in history. Our technology has the power to connect billions of people in one network, in a way that was never possible. Yet despite this, so many people are lonely. Why is this? Can you share 3 of the main reasons why our young people are facing a loneliness epidemic today? Please give a story or an example for each.
Even though we have greater accessibility to each other, this does not speak to the quality of our interactions as well as our felt sense of connection. Social media can serve as a replacement for deeper connection. Additionally, given that so much of our lives is on display, this can also reinforce a focus on image which counters authenticity and vulnerability, both key experiences in establishing more fulfilling and genuine relationships with others.
What signs would you tell parents, friends, or loved ones to look for in young people they think may need help? Can you please explain?
I would recommend looking out for withdrawal from friends and activities of interest. In children and adolescents, shifts in mood might also manifest as irritability and aggression rather than sadness. Other signs might include school refusal, physical symptoms (such as stomachaches or headaches), difficulty concentrating, a reduction in grades and changes in eating and sleeping.
Ok. It is not enough to talk about problems without offering possible solutions. In your experience, what are the “5 Things Each Of Us Can Do To Help Solve The Loneliness Epidemic Among Young People?” Please give a story or an example for each.
Make efforts to connect with others in a deeper fashion, by actively listening, establishing times to engage in meaningful activities and mutual hobbies and sharing thoughts and feelings. Lean into existing relationships with individuals who are positive and encouraging. If you have friends that you feel particularly safe with, intentionally spend time fortifying those connections. To increase your social network, I would encourage involvement in activities of interest to meet like-minded individuals. Activities also offer structure for conversation, which can reduce anxiety. Volunteering is another great way to connect and increase a sense of meaning. Finally, spending time on self-care and nurturing your relationship with self can improve confidence and your ability to be present when spending time with others.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Please feel free to look me up on my website at https://www.nyhealthhypnosis.com/dr-sara-glazer. Our website also contains our blog posts about relevant therapeutic topics.
Thank you so much for these insights. This was so inspiring, and so important!
About The Interviewer: Pirie is a TedX speaker, author and a Life Empowerment Coach. She is a co-host of Own your Throne podcast, inspiring women in the 2nd chapter of their lives. With over 20 years in front of the camera, Pirie Grossman understands the power of storytelling. After success in commercials and acting. She spent 10 years reporting for E! Entertainment Television, Entertainment Tonight, also hosted ABC’s “Every Woman”. Her work off-camera capitalizes on her strength, producing, bringing people together for unique experiences. She produced a Children’s Day of Compassion during the Dalai Lama’s visit here in 2005. 10,000 children attended, sharing ideas about compassion with His Holiness. From 2006–2009, Pirie Co-chaired the Special Olympics World Winter Games, in Idaho, welcoming 3,000 athletes from over 150 countries. She founded Destiny Productions to create Wellness Festivals and is an Advisory Board member of the Sun Valley Wellness Board.In February 2017, Pirie produced, “Love is Louder”, a Brain Health Summit, bringing in Kevin Hines, noted suicide survivor to Sun Valley who spoke to school kids about suicide. Sun Valley is in the top 5% highest suicide rate per capita in the Northwest, prompting a community initiative with St. Luke’s and other stake holders, to begin healing. She lives in Sun Valley with her two children, serves on the Board of Community School. She has her Master’s degree in Spiritual Psychology from the University of Santa Monica and is an Executive Life Empowerment Coach, where she helps people meet their dreams and goals! The difference between a dream and a goal is that a goal is a dream with a date on it!
