Taking the Leap: Author Claire Berger On How To Learn To Believe In Yourself
An Interview With Savio P. Clemente
Change is not only possible, but also probable, so embrace life’s pivots with grace and an open mind. The benefits are boundless. When I decided to end my marriage after thirty years together, I accepted that everything familiar in my day to day life would change and I embraced it as a fresh start. You are never too old to begin again.
Starting something new is scary. Learning to believe in yourself can be a critical precursor to starting a new initiative. Why is it so important to learn to believe in yourself? How can someone work on gaining these skills? In this interview series, we are talking to business leaders, authors, writers, coaches, medical professionals, teachers, to share empowering insights about “How To Learn To Believe In Yourself.” As a part of this series we had the pleasure of interviewing Claire Berger.
For over four decades, Claire Berger has been earning a living as a comedian, improv actor, keynote speaker and writer. She began her career in Chicago with The Second City and found big laughs in Los Angeles, earning acclaim as a warm-up comedian on over sixty five of your favorite sitcoms, including Seinfeld. Claire was also the first comedian HGTV hired to host a series (Fantasy Open House).
Pivoting from television to corporate boardrooms, Claire helped businesses have fun while getting the job done with her memorable bespoke events.
Claire has always found humor in unlikely places, including Italian kitchens where she served as resident writer and cookbook contributor for two popular culinary immersion programs, Tuscan Women Cook and Italian Culinary Adventures.
Claire wrote “How Much Is Enough? Getting More By Living With Less” as an interactive memoir, to give voice to the ever present conversation we’re all having in our heads. How much is ENOUGH… Exercise? Religion? Health? Shoes? Family? Food? Claire tackles an array of topics in twenty-two chapters that can be adapted into an entertaining, interactive keynote that will engage audiences of every age and stage of life.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dive into the main focus of our interview, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?
What or who inspired you to pursue your career? We’d love to hear the story.
My mother was a teacher and loved the arts. She would take me to theater, movies and always the library. She was a huge supporter of my writing and performing at an early age.
It has been said that our mistakes can be our greatest teachers. Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?
Well, I don’t believe mistakes are tragic. And while we can’t always control all the things happen to us, I believe how we respond can chart the course for our life. For example, looking back at my decision to marry at such a young age (20!) could be perceived by some as a mistake, but it was very important in my maturation process and afforded me a great deal of creative support.
What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now? How do you think that might help people?
Three years ago, I totally uprooted my life in Los Angeles to move to Brooklyn to completely reinvent both my personal and professional life at 64 years old. This exhilarating pivot is the inspiration for my new interactive memoir “How Much is Enough? Getting More By Living With Less.” I believe this chapter of my life shows everyone that radical change is possible at any age.
OK, thank you for all of that. Let’s now shift to the core focus of our interview. This will be intuitive to you but it will be helpful to spell this out directly. Can you help explain a few reasons why it is so important to believe in yourself? Can you share a story or give some examples?
What exactly does it mean to believe in yourself? (Can I believe that I can be a great artist even though I’m not very talented? Can I believe I can be a gold medal Olympic even if I’m not athletic)? Can you please explain what you mean?
I think it is imperative to believe in yourself, AND also to be realistic and optimistic in following your passions in life. I have an enormous amount of pride in the trajectory of my life, both personally and professionally and am grateful for all of it, even the difficult challenges. I believe that the toughest challenges can reveal our deepest strengths. I illustrate this in detail in my book.
Was there a time when you did not believe in yourself? How did this impact your choices?
Launching a career as a woman in comedy in the 1980’s was filled with obstacles. I was faced with many people who discouraged my dream of becoming a comedian. It was natural to second guess myself in light of negative feedback, But I found ways to circumvent the negativity and worked hard not to take any of it personally. What impacted my professional ambition the most was the decision to have children and be present to raise them, something very few of my fellow female comics were doing at the time.
At what point did you realize that in order to get to the next level, it would be necessary to build up your belief in yourself? Can you share the story with us?
For me ‘the next level’ was not what other fellow comedians were seeking. Most wanted to be booked on national tours, be cast in the ensemble on SNL or the Tonight Show. I wanted to earn a living as a comedian AND be home to raise my kids, so I knew it would be necessary to give up larger career aspirations that would lead to more money and fame. Looking back on my 40+ year career, I can say with certainty that I have no regrets about this decision. The payoff has been profound. I worked on so many great network television series (including Seinfeld) as a warm-up comedian AND the relationship I have with my fully launched, adult children is more precious than any professional achievement I could have imagined.
What are your top 5 strategies that will help someone learn to believe in themselves? Please share a story or example for each.
1 . Change is not only possible, but also probable, so embrace life’s pivots with grace and an open mind. The benefits are boundless. When I decided to end my marriage after thirty years together, I accepted that everything familiar in my day to day life would change and I embraced it as a fresh start. You are never too old to begin again.
2 . Surround yourself with positive people. Their energy and support will have a huge impact on your own belief strategies. My father always told people a joke as soon as he met them. Even in his final years in dementia, he could still remember his joke and tell it to everyone he met. They were immediately charmed by his ninety year old wit and charm.
3 . Challenge yourself to accomplish a big adventure or a big project. Pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, like learning a musical instrument, training for a marathon or writing a book, will instill a deeper belief in yourself that will bolster your confidence for the rest of your life. After I had my kids I couldn’t run any more but I loved distance walking, so I signed up for, and completed seven full (26.2 mile) marathons as a registered walker.
4 . Dedicate part of your life to public service. Volunteering is the best way to find a healthier perspective in your own life, deepening your gratitude for all that you are and all that you have. When I prepare meals to be delivered to New York’s homebound residents through Gods Love We Deliver, I am reminded how lucky I am to be healthy and to be able to feed myself and my family fresh,wholesome meals.
5 . Most importantly, believe that you are ENOUGH. With age I have learned that self confidence comes from within, not from others’ judgement. Believing that I am smart enough, attractive enough or successful enough projects to others my belief in myself.
Conversely, how can one stop the negative stream of self-criticism that often accompanies us as we try to grow?
Don’t live your life by committee. Asking too many people their opinions about your many life decisions will undermine your self-confidence. Be intentional in your decisions and stand by them.
Are there any misconceptions about self-confidence and believing in oneself that you would like to dispel?
Anything is NOT possible. I think practical optimism should replace blind faith.
What advice would you give to someone who is struggling with imposter syndrome?
Own your success and be proud of what you have achieved both personally and professionally. Also, seek opportunities to help someone else to succeed the way you have through meaningful mentorship.
Ok, we are nearly done. You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good for the greatest number of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger.
My goal in writing “How Much Is Enough?” is to start a conversation and personal contemplation about the concept of ‘Enough’ in all aspects of our lives. My hope is that after reading my book, people will look at their lives with a renewed sense of self-esteem and acceptance, discovering that what they have is more than enough.
We are very blessed that some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US, whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we both tag them :-)
Jon Stewart! He is smart, funny and committed to making the world better by using his fame to make powerful changes in the world.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Please visit my website, claireberger.com and subscribe to my monthly newsletter. I also have a wonderful community on my “How Much Is Enough?” Facebook group.
Thank you for these really excellent insights, and we greatly appreciate the time you spent with this. We wish you continued success.
Thank you!
About The Interviewer: Savio P. Clemente coaches cancer survivors to overcome the confusion and gain the clarity needed to get busy living in mind, body, and spirit. He inspires health and wellness seekers to find meaning in the “why” and cultivate resilience in their mindset. Savio is a Board Certified Wellness Coach (NBC-HWC, ACC), #1 best-selling author, syndicated columnist, podcaster, stage 3 cancer survivor, and founder of The Human Resolve LLC. He has interviewed notable celebrities and TV personalities and has been featured on Fox News, The Wrap, and has worked with Authority Magazine, Thrive Global, BuzzFeed, Food Network, WW and Bloomberg. Savio has been invited to cover numerous industry events throughout the U.S. and abroad. His mission is to provide clients, listeners, and viewers alike with tangible takeaways on how to lead a truly healthy, wealthy, and wise lifestyle.
